Spidereal Monkey: The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Tarot

TheSims2.com - Exchange Story Detail

2010-03-22T08:33:00.000+10:00

Why I still like the ending of Tim Winton's Dirt Music, no matter how inconclusive!

2009-09-10T13:16:00.003+10:00

I have long considered Tim Winton's Dirt Music THE "great Australian novel", or at least one of the greatest Aussie novels ever.
Some readers may object to the inconclusiveness of the ending.
OK, what is happening at the end? Georgie has just found Luther Fox, and then it seems she has to administer mouth-to-mouth to revive him, or he may be lost...
Normally, such an ending would annoy me too, in most regular "love stories".
We do want to know whether it is a comedy ("happy ending"), or a tragedy.
Dirt Music, in my humble opinion, surpasses these usual literary characterisations.
Georgie, being the obsessive type she is, and desperately in search of a "meaning" to fill the void of her own life, hopes she has found it in Fox. Jim, equally obsessive and driven by will, jumps on to the bandwagon of her search, "for something to do". These are motivations which I feel sure many of us can identify with.
Luther Fox is perhaps equally obsessive in his own way, but is more obsessed with rather more transpersonal issues, of finding a "meaning" in the music (the "dirt music" of the title) welling up from the depths of his being, and indeed from the depths of the land itself, real "roots" and "grassroots" music. I feel he was in fact almost at the point of completely disappearing or blending into the landscape in a state of mystical oneness, which was perhaps the consummation he so devoutly wished. I feel that whichever way the ressuscitation eventuated, Luther at least would be "happy", either conventionally, with Georgie, or unconventionally, in death, without her. Georgie's quest might have to continue a little longer, at least if she failed to revive Fox, and she wouldn't necessarily have the affinity with "dirt music" to help her... Poor Georgie!
The point is that the vastness of the landscape (the Australian landscape, and the West Australian, in particular) completely dwarfs ALL petty human concerns! In a special sense, whether or not the wishes of the human protagonists are fulfilled, remains irrelevant. The real "love story" in this book is, I feel, Tim Winton's own love for the vastness of the landscape itself, which reduces all human characters and their necessarily petty concerns to mere dots or disappearing smudges upon that very landscape... In this, he does in fact give a new meaning to those mawkish lines of Dorothea Mackellar's, so often jingoistically or chauvinistically recited, "I love a sunburnt country, a land of sweeping plains..."
Whether or not humans and their concerns even continue to survive in this landscape is ultimately irrelevant, compared to the vast and rich landscape of fish, birds, quolls (yes, don't forget the quolls!) etc. etc., which so richly populate the book, that at times it reads like a wildlife or nature documentary! Even the indigenous people have seemingly forgotten how to live according to "the traditional ways" of closeness and oneness with the land. In "going native", Luther had almost begun to approximate their perhaps earlier experience.
It is a challenging book, I feel, and would be a challenge for most city-dwelling Australians, since our lives are normally lived between tram-stops and cappuccinos. But it does us good to escape the tiny limits of our own petty concerns and open our minds to the truly "bigger picture" of our own outback once in a while. I suggest that book clubbers could fruitfully dig around in this book, and explore their own reactions to it, and also find themselves confronted with the "bigger" questions, as well as the bigger picture, of life, the universe and their own place in it!

P.S. Recently, a brand-new copy of Charles Dickens' Great Expectations fell serendipitously into my hands, a real bonus "gift of the universe", as it were. It might also be a fruitful exercise, in a later blog post, to "compare and contrast" the lack of resolution between Pip and Estella in that, with our reactions to the lack of resolution between Luther and Georgie! Which, if any, is more satisfying, and why? I suspect, in my case, it may be the Winton version, but only because England is, after all, a lot tinier than Australia (how many maps of England CAN you fit inside a map of WA?), and therefore just does not have the "landscape" for the "bigger picture"! ;-))

A small story from the small world of the Sims: Jacob Martin, Riverblossom Hills

2009-06-04T07:57:00.000+10:00

On the face of it, Riverblossom Hills, where I grew up, looks like one of the more boring Sims neighbourhoods. Quiet, peaceful, rural, the residents seem to have no interests other than gardening and fishing. We have winter for eight months of the year, and the rest of the year it rains, which is why our hills are always so lush and verdant, and even the weather is boring. But Riverblossom Hills also has more than its fair share of gossips, journalists and aspiring journalists, because I guess we all really know that every house has its share of secrets, and a huge scoop lies behind every doorway!
I don't remember much about my mother Elena, although my father Andrew tells me she taught me to talk and potty-trained me, whereas he only got to teach me to walk. We were all living at the time in the huge Viejo hacienda, home of Catherine and Julio Viejo, who always wanted it to be a true "family home". Unfortunately, Julio died, so Catherine never got to have the family she always wanted, although for a while Mum, Dad and I were her "substitute family". Then my mum died, when I was still quite small. She must have been something special, because Dad went to seed after that, and hasn't looked at another woman since.
Jules O'Mackey was the first love of my life, my puppy-love and childhood sweetheart. I had my first kiss with her, and then we did the usual teenage things of going steady, and breaking up. It was never clear why we broke up, at least not to me. But Jules has been known to have a bit of a temper, so she must have flown off the handle about something one day.
Then I met, and had my first kiss with Sandra Roth, who then had dazzling platinum blonde braids, and was duly swept off my feet - talk about a coup de foudre! - and we went steady for a while...
Jules wasn't happy. She had her own troubles, you see. She had also lost her mother, Alexander, when quite young. Only Alexandra had not died; she simply up and left one day, and ran off to sea to be a pirate... I kid you not! We know she really was a pirate in those "missing years" because she has since shown us her secret hoard of rare and primitive artefacts from the south seas. Jules has since then been working on "reclaiming" her mother as a kind of friend. Alexandra now lives up the road from us, although Riverblossom Hills was once too quiet and boring for her - or maybe it was just Jules' dad, the schoolteacher Gabe, who was just too quiet and boring for her! We are not quite sure what she does, and don't want to know, because it is probably something not quite legal; she shares a house with the Japanese professional studio musician Cleo Shibiku. Jules' dad Gabe has since found love with Cleo's former housemate, the sedate brunette Patricia Wan; he loves her because she is so unlike the fiery redhead Alexandra, who has been known to have the odd affair with married men even since her return from the high seas!
But Jules wasn't happy, while I was going steady with Sandra (Sandra's dad is the high-flying International Sim of Mystery, Morty Roth, who seems to have been the original inspiration for Ian Fleming's, and Sean Connery's, James Bond, and seems set to achieve his lifetime ambition of becoming a Space Pirate before his rapidly approaching retirement; Sandra is just starting out now, but she seems to want to follow in his footsteps, and they are big footsteps to fill!). I know Jules wasn't happy at this time, because Dad tells me he met her when we dined out at the Lucky Cards Shack in my first year of college, with my college buddy Gordon Kosmokos. Sandy bumped into Jules there, and wanted to scratch Jules' eyes out, and Jules was so upset, my dad had to try and cheer her up a bit!
Sandy, Jules and I all went to the local college, the Tower Academy, known locally, and somewhat sardonically, as "The Ivory Tower". At the start of my freshman year, I tried to do the frat. boy thing, and give hilarious parties; but my attempt at a dorm. party was a huge flop, and such a fizzer, I decided to give up the party-animal thing, and knuckle down, and become a nerd instead. So had Jules. We met up again in college, fell in love all over again, made out, and I lost my virginity to her, and she to me; one thing led to another, and we became engaged, and moved into double digs, and all in my freshman year!
Jules and I both majored in philosophy, because, for all the intra-faculty jokes about it only preparing us for the fast-food industry, it also trained us to use polysyllabic words with great aplomb, and we both have journalistic, and literary, aspirations! Pascal once said that all our troubles come from the fact that we do not know how to just sit quietly in a room. I am inclined to think he was right, because sometime after I had become engaged to Jules, I had an affair with Sandra - still a dazzling blonde at the time (not all gentlemen prefer blondes, but I certainly have a thing about them!) - and even moved in with her and her room-mate Emily Lee for a short while. For days, it seemed, she would not let me leave the bedroom; I was a very happy, and contented, prisoner of love... Jules went ballistic! She had it out with Sandra, and for a while I thought she would kill her, as I looked helplessly on from the sidelines, secretly flattered that they were fighting over little old ME! I didn't want either of them to die. I didn't want to lose either of them. I still don't.
Jules won the scrag-fight, so I was "legally" now her official property, and toyboy, lock, stock and barrel. I kept my head down, my nose clean, and my occasional visits to Sandra very discreet, so Jules would not know about them. In the meantime, Sandra had abandoned her original psych. major, and started studying lit. instead (with a view to following in her hero dad's footsteps), and, on the rebound from me, became involved in an intense lesbian affair with Emily, who had just been curious about all this sex-business, and wanted to find out what all the fuss was about! When SHE sprang Sandra with me one day, she was so upset, she stormed out, back to the dorm, and spent her last senior semester separated from Sandra, and trying to get over her, but still dreaming of her, and unable to let go... Now they are living together, with Sandra's dad, and her journalist mum Stella, from whom Sandy inherited her original platinum blonde looks. Despite the fact that she graduated with honours, and showed much promise in many disciplines, it took Emily a while to find any sort of job at all, and when she did, it was only as a blog writer, a very lowly step on the journalistic career ladder. Sandy had dropped out to be with her, and she has a similarly low-ranking job (spelunking) on her dad's adventuring career ladder.
My dad had quite high ambitions for me, but none at all for himself, it seems. As I said, he never got over the death of my mum Elena, and, even while I was at college, spent some time eking out an existence as lowlife scum, a mere pickpocket. He still LOOKS like lowlife scum (or the comic-book guy on the Simpsons!) with his greasy ponytail, perpetual five o'clock shadow and morbid obesity. He absolutely NEVER works out! But at least he has "gone straight" from his life of crime, unlike Jules' mum, presumably to make some sort of better role-model for me, as if I need one (!), and has taken to the gaming career instead. When Jules and I graduated from college, he did not nag us to get jobs straight away, presumably because he was preoccupied with rising to the status of gold farmer within that!
Catherine Viejo has since moved out of the old hacienda, to start up her own little love-nest with her elderly squeeze, Betty, a Jewish legal secretary, after the model of the two old lesbian ladies of Glebe House, in Robertson Davies' The Cunning Man, so there is much more room in the old hacienda, to be filled with more Martins, although Jules and I are in no hurry to do so... I am flat out giving every appearance of being a devoted fiance to Jules. Don't ask me to be a husband and father just yet!
I worry about the obesity genes I obviously inherit from my dad. Jules has had no trouble keeping in shape, and likes the husky, muscular jock-type. Unfortunately I will NEVER be one of those! But, like Sandra, I hate fatties, and, since I see in myself my father's tendency to precisely that, I don't mind working out, occasionally, in moderation, so I at least won't be too repulsive in the rare, stolen moments I still occasionally enjoy with Sandra. I must be careful Jules does not find out; Sandra must be careful Emily does not find out, which makes our moments together all the rarer and further between. Sandy knows I can only give her half my heart, because half of it belongs to Jules; I know Sandy can only give me half her heart, because half of it belongs to Emily. What Sandy and Emily get up to is no great concern to me; it is after all every guy's favorite fantasy, and I would love to be the proverbial fly on the wall! I can do the "metrosexual" thing and share the odd dirty joke with my gay friend Mitch, but shudder to think what he and his squeeze Max must be getting up to in the privacy of their... Never mind. Double standard? I guess so. Max and Mitch are still at college, by the way, soon to return to Riverblossom. Maybe all the lesbian partnerships that have become such a part of our community will smooth the way for their "queer-as-folk"-ness.
I forgot to tell you about Jules' other friendship, with yet another lesbian, the Satanic witch, Marla Biggs, also a graduate with honours, and medical doctor! Marla lives with a much older practising black witch called Jeannie, and I simply cannot comprehend what she sees in her! Jeannie still looks like a horribly withered, and malicious, old crone to me; maybe she knows the original secret of "glamour", which is actually a spell put on someone to bewitch them, and make them think you are terribly attractive, when you are not... Nor can I understand Sandy's little brother Xander, also still at college, falling for another geriatric, the Native American medicine woman and shaman Mrs Smoke, so-called because strange-smelling smoke is ALWAYS issuing from her chimney, and wanting to live with her when HE graduates, although Mrs Smoke is mildly more attractive than Jeannie at least, since she has the smooth, polished, weathered look of an old stone, or piece of driftwood, kind of ageless, and timeless really, with her silver braids...
But these are just some of the stories of Riverblossom Hills. In the meantime, Jules and I kicked back and started our first novels until we got jobs: Jules always says mine represents a "Magian world-view", which she circumscribes with words like "phantasmagoria" and "Arabian nights", and which she says ultimately derives from Spengler; this is a good thing, because it means I have fictionalised my real inspiration and muse sufficiently that she does not recognise it as Sandra, and me joking that, if I was the one who looked pregnant already, it was because we had two "babies" on the way, only her brain-child is more clear-eyed and dispassionate than mine, and celebrates what she calls the Great Justice, which we do not dish out ourselves, but every Sim gets, in the form of what comes to them!
Do we deserve what we get coming to us? My dad and I both got struck by lightning at the same time, just after I had moved home from college; it literally scared the crap out of me, and was a horribly embarrassing little "accident"!
Jules and I now both have reasonably respectable journalistic jobs, as obituary writers. At least we don't have to start out writing horoscopes, although SOMEONE has to churn out that crap peddled by the tabloids! At least you get to research real, if dead, people, when writing obits. We know quite a bit about real, if dead, people, because we had to study "old dead guys who thought stuff" at college. And it definitely beats the ultimate spectre of getting stuck in some dead-end job in the fast food industry, which they always said at college ultimately awaited us... I am still nearly as paunchy as dad, for all my efforts to shift the flab, for Sandy's, Jules' and my own sakes. Mind you, I did maximise the cooking skill, if only because I was a couch potato who enjoyed watching the cooking channel in my spare moments between assignments, while Jules was flat out becoming uber-charismatic, and we are both uber-creative types! Maybe I should start chomping on a cigar, so I can look suitably scowly and jowly, like Orson Wells in Citizen Kane, in anticipation of the day Jules and I presumably both become media magnates together...
I love Jules to death, and can't get enough of her, especially since she dyed her hair platinum blonde (Sandy has since dyed her hair brown, and paints her face with little hippie-stars and flower-decals, to cater to Emily's tastes!).
"But why did Pip never stop yearning for Estella?" is a question that still haunts me. (From one of Sandy's last term papers, while still at college). I, perhaps more than any Sim, already know all about "great expectations", and how we can't always get we want, no matter what we do. I still want both Jules and Sandy, and that is just not going to happen.
Why do I not stop yearning for Sandra, when I have Jules?
I'll see Jules tonight, when the car pool drops us both back home.
When will I get a chance to enjoy a sweet, stolen moment with Sandy again?

Sims2 Tarot: King of Wands

2009-02-25T21:27:00.001+10:00

http://thesims2.ea.com/exchange/story_detail.php?asset_id=244647&asset_type=story&user_id=2972270

Spidereal Monkey: the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Tarot

2008-08-13T20:24:00.001+10:00

Glitterati is resurrected, and back, in Yahoo games (literati)!!!

2008-06-29T19:03:00.003+10:00

Interesting dream last night, if scary: Bjorn Erik was cutting off my feet; not really painful, but I felt anxious about how many more body parts he would remove, before there was nothing left of me at all! ;-P

Shibboleth: a new meaning for an ancient word?

2008-06-09T11:00:00.003+10:00

Shibboleth is a word that is often misused, and misunderstood, although in its proper English meaning it can have its uses, and I suggest one here (it went over the heads of literati gamers, but then I over-estimated the average IQ of the room? lol)

It comes from the Bible, Judges 12:6, in which the Hebrews use it as a test-word to distinguish the fleeing Ephraimites. How does this have relevance in the cyber-age, I hear you ask?

Since it denotes a word or sound which a person cannot pronounce correctly, a word used for detecting foreigners, I propose it in its proper meaning as a new word for those "word verification thingies" online, for which I had never before thought of a single descriptive word!

Alternatively, you could also use it to denote the jocular urging by Aussies of Kiwis to say "fish and chips", to betray their NZ origin! lol

The Wyrd of Words

2008-06-08T13:59:00.002+10:00

Reading Julian Burnside's Word Watching: field notes from an amateur philologist has just re-kindled my juvenile passion (I did not know then one could call it amateur philology!), so this Sunday afternoon I choose to spend recalling some interesting snippets, and compiling them here.

Pedal was once an adjective, deriving from the pedal pipes of an organ, i.e. those played by the foot.
Admiral, despite its form, does not derive from admire, although for a short time in the 17thC it did mean admirable. In fact it derives from the Arabic amir al bahr: commander of the sea.
Bridegroom also gives a false idea of its origins. A groom is a person who attends to animals, especially horses, by currying and feeding them. The original bridegroom was the Anglo-Saxon brydguma: bride man. It gradually shifted to brydgome, becoming conflated with groom (attendant).
To curry favour <> (French), meaning to curry a horse of brownish or reddish yellow. In a 12thC story, this represented fraud or deceit, so the moral of the story was not to curry favour, i.e. waste care and effort on a deceiver. In English, fauvel become misunderstood as favour...
The very Spanish word flamenco in fact was once a disparaging term for natives of Flanders.
The Spanish word batador (one who administers a beating, or the instrument used for that purpose) came into English and became battledore (a paddle-shaped instrument used for beating clothes in washing, and also the flat-ended instrument used for placing loaves in the oven; the game we now call shuttlecock was called battledore and shuttlecock until the end of the 19thC.
Venison originally meant any animal hunted for meat.
Leveret = a young hare; grice = a young hog, if still sucking; a young weaned hog = a shoat. Pups = also baby rats or dragons. Eyas = a young hawk. Poult = young turkey or domestic chicken. Young cod = codling or sprag, or scrod. Elver = a baby eel. Young salmon = sprag or parr, then smolt, then grisle, and alevin. Spat = the spawn of oysters and other bivalves.
Dasypodid = pertaining to armadillos. Vespertilian = pertaining to bats. Vituline = pertaining to calves. Pithecoid and simian => monkeys; pongid => gorillas and orang utans.
Coleridge's albatross was more likely a pelican, deriving from the Portuguese alcatras; the notorious US prison derives its name from the large pelican colony there.
Abaciscus = a square compartment enclosing part or whole of the design of a Mosaic pavement.
Denariate = a piece of land worth a penny a year.
Holluschickie = young males of the northern or Alaska fur seal.
Turdiform = having the form or appearance of a thrush.
We need an equivalent of the Italian magari ('Ah but that it were so').
Bail up comes originally from dairy farming and was adopted ad hoc by Australian bushrangers. The bail was the frame used for holding the cow's head during milking; the farmer would tell her to "bail up" when he pushed her into the bail. By the time of Ned Kelly, it came to mean a demand for submission to another's will.
For some reason, Australians also have a lot of slang terms for cicadas: cad, baker, floury baker, floury miller, green Monday, yellow Monday, miller, mealyback, red eye and double drummer.
In 1791, "sparrow-grass" was so common a term, that its more correct version, asparagus, sounded stiff and pedantic.
Miniature does not primarily refer small size, but rather "the action or process of rubricating letters or of illuminating a manuscript".
Quantum leap has come to mean a very large change in amount, position or attitude; in fact, according to Max Planck who coined it, it refers to the smallest change in position possible in the known universe!
Cyber derives originally from the Greek kubernetos, meaning steersman, which also gives us our English words gubernatorial, and related cognates.
A parting shot was originally a Parthian shot. In 55 BC, ineffectual Roman general Crassus was defeated by the Parthians with the following tactic: they let fly a volley of arrows, then turned in retreat. Thinking their resources exhausted, the Romans followed, only to meet yet another volley unexpectedly.
Bandicoot derives from the Telugu pandi-kokku, meaning pig-rat.
The Australian plonk, meaning cheap wine, derives from the French vin blanc, although plonk can just as easily, and more usually, be red!
Seersucker <>shir o shakkar, literally 'milk and sugar'.
Do-si-do, as in square dancing, <>dos-a-dos, back to back.
Nickname <> (or supplementary name).
Penthouse < Old French pentis, a lean-to or covered walkway.
Collective nouns: a skein of geese, when in flight (a gaggle on the ground); a skulk of foxes; a hover of trout; a drift of hogs; an exaltation of larks; a bouquet of pheasants (when they break cover in front of hunters); a murder of crows; a rafter of turkeys; a fall of woodcocks; a murmuration of starlings; a dule of doves; a cast of hawks; a deceit of lapwings; an ostentation of peacocks; an unkindness of ravens; a host of sparrows; a congregation of plovers; a mustering of storks; a flight of swallows; a watch of nightingales; a parliament of owls. A pod of seals; a gam of whales; a sloth of bears; a gang of elk; a crash of rhinoceroses; a barren of mules; a shrewdness of apes; a rout of wolves. And among humankind: a school of clerks, a sentence of judges, an eloquence of lawyers, a subtlety of sergeants (at law), a prudence of vicars, an obeisance of servants, a cutting of cobblers, a bleach of suitors (same as cobblers), a misbelieving of painters, a worship of writers, a superfluity of nuns, a herd of harlots, a scolding of seamstresses.
Vietnam doublespeak: collateral damage = killing innocent civilians; removal with extreme prejudice = assassination; energetic disassembly = nuclear explosion; limited duration protective reaction air strikes = bombing villages in Vietnam; incontinent ordnance = bombs that hit schools and hospitals by mistake; active defence = invasion.
Bushisms: "more and more of our imports come from overseas"; and my personal favorite: "French is a silly language: it has no word for entrepreneur"! lol
Fart was more or less polite language until the 18thC. A fizzle = a close fart (1598). Interestingly enough, the French petard, which survives in our phrase 'hoist with his own petard', also means a fart!
Originally naughty meant having nothing, needy, from naught/nought. Then it came to mean wicked, i.e. morally bankrupt, in the King James Bible. Shakespeare also used it to convey real wickedness. I.e. at least until the end of the 16thC, it was probably safer to call someone a fart or a turd, than suggest they were naughty!
English has no single word for the act of sexual intercourse, other than fuck (think about it: for such a popular pastime, this makes it really difficult to talk about!) lol
Poppycock <>(Dutch).
Nice originally meant stupid, from the Latin nescius, ignorant. Shakespeare did not use it much, because it had acquired such a weight of ambiguous meanings by his time!
Pedigree < foot of the crane (French), referring to the shape of old diagrams of pedigrees.
Philtrum = the vertical groove from the nose to the upper lip, in case you wondered (and haven't we all?).
Strait-laced = literally, someone with the tendency to tie their stay-laces too tightly.
Halcyon days = literally the 14 days of calm around the midwinter solstice, interestingly, associated in mythology with the kingfisher, who gets its biological name from this.
A clew or clue = first and foremost, a ball of string or twine, as in the thread Ariadne gave to Theseus to guide him through the labyrinth.
Tawdry lace <> once a sign of real finery (she attributed her death by throat cancer to the vanity of wearing a silken lace around her neck). Tinsel also derives from the old French etincelle, a spark, which we also get in scintillate.
They and their have a long and respectable history as a third-person singular, non-gender-specific pronoun, so advocates of political correctness, take heart: you may use it as a substitute for his or her, no matter what the grammatical purists say!
Being baffled was originally a very dishonorable punishment meted out to dishonorable knights; I will spare you the sordid details: look it for yourself, if you must!
Some obsolete Aussie slang: kangaroo feathers = a furphy, an impossible thing; Anzac button = a nail used in place of a button; camel dung = an Egyptian cigarette; throw a seven = to die; throw a six and a half = to almost die; Anzac stew = an urn of hot water and bacon rind; Anzac wafer = a very hard biscuit; Anzac soup = water in a shell-hole polluted by a corpse (ew! this has to be the foulest and most grisly I have encountered yet!) ;-P
Tabloid was originally copyrighted by Burroughs, Wellcome & co of London to refer to
the handy size of their pharmaceutical products

Stranger than fiction

2008-05-22T06:33:00.001+10:00
> Stranger than Fiction

>> Harold Crick (Will Farrell) is an IRS auditor who almost
> compulsively measures, quantifies and rationalizes his life.
> Suddenly, he becomes aware of a voice narrating his
> life, "accurately and with a better vocabulary." The voice is that
> of a writer we learn is struggling with writer's block (Emma
> Thompson), mostly about the best way to make Harold die. When Harold
> overhears his impending doom, he takes action, and eventually makes
> his way to a professor of literary theory (Dustin Hoffman), who
> helps him understand the implications of the narrative life he is
> leading. The main story line seems to be around a woman he is
> auditing, played by Maggie Gyllenhaal. Realizing he could die at any
> moment, Harold begins to break free of his limited, orderly life,
> and joins Gyllenhaal in a romantic relationship. He tracks down
> Thompson and confronts her with the truth: if she writes about his
> death, then he will die. But Hoffman is convinced the novel must be
> written as intended, and Thompson herself is ambivalent. Crick
> himself reads the novel and encourages her to keep the original
> ending, which would kill him.

Interesting; kind of reminds me of the real-life/fictional interaction between J.K.Rowling and Harry Potter. Since she had resolved, arbitrarily or not, to have no more than seven books in the series, in the seventh he came closer than ever to finally "dying" once and for all; this possibility really upset me, for one, as I would have liked to see HP "grow up" out of perpetual adolescence! J.K. herself seemed determined to kill him off, but her millions of child readers prevailed, and "saved" Harry from premature death; he also lives on, as per the end of the Deathly Hallows, in my Sims game! lol

So maybe Harry did also come to experience that kind of real-life/fictional transcendence, or liberation, which we also see in The Truman Show, in which Harold Crick's compulsion to "script" his own life is seen completely externalised in the "evil" (gnostic demiurge) director Christof; Truman himself also came perilously close to dying, in the "reality TV show of his life", remember, until he finally also managed to escape, by literally smashing through the boundary between fiction and real life... ;-))

Not as "funny" as some of Jim Carrey's other movies, but infinitely deeper, and I have always thought it some kind of gnostic epiphany in itself (my hubby thought so too, and he normally could not stand Jim Carrey!) ;-))

Another novel that explores the boundaries between reality and fiction is Sophie's World, by Jostein Gaardner, also for younger readers, the more philosophically inclined and/or the more philosophically inclined among younger readers! I for one have always wanted to write a sequel to Sophie's World, which for some reason I imagine as beginning on a plane, leaving Bangkok, where she finds herself seated next to Thomas Merton (!), bound for Alaska, where he always imagined his "ideal hermitage", and perhaps a bit of "northern exposure"...? hehe

Then again it might also be fun to make a sequel to the Truman Show, if more cinematically inclined; does Truman make it to Fiji, I wonder? And does he catch up with his childhood sweetheart, who helped him escape Christof, along with all of us, as we sat on the edges of our seats, rooting for him? ;-))

Ben Elton's latest

2008-04-19T17:12:00.001+10:00
I don't know if you have managed to get hold of Richard Dawkins' The God Delusion yet, but, if not, as a consolation prize, try getting your hands in the meantime on Ben Elton's latest: Blind Faith. It seems to me to correspond, in fictional terms, to Dawkins' magnum opus, and also, incidentally (?!), a follow-up, revision or update to George Orwell's 1984 (which sadly not only needed updating because, having a year as its title, it suddenly became passe when that year finished, but also because of the intervening presence of the internet, blogs, Google and Facebook, all of which it features!). The librarian did not like it: too much "gloom and doom" for her taste, and "not as funny" as his others, but it does contain elements of very, very dark, bitter, 'black' comedy... although with a sadly tragic, while still hopeful, end! It envisions a post-apocalyptic world (After the Flood) in which the "fundies", i.e. anyone who believes in anything, a faith incorporating elements from Christianity, Asian religions and the New Age, have well and truly taken over, and science has become officially illegal!!! Anyone who dares to think for themselves and follow reason rather than faith had better beware...!!! Do yourself a favor: I know you will love it; I did, and also found it powerfully moving, especially at the end... Enuff said! ;-))

P.S. Ironically blogging this, despite Elton's warning about the futility of blogs, since "no one reads them anyway"! lol

Three, no, four wyrd dreams, for the price of one!

2008-04-05T06:47:00.002+10:00
>A Three Episode Dream

>I had a three episode wyrd dream. All of them occurred at the sameplace: A very large hall with very high ceilings:

>Episode 1: I had a companion - a man; with whom we had hundreds ofmen/trees as captives. My companion were kind to them and I was very loyal to him. Suddenly he became mad. Tortured them and began toviolate me. He began to kill everybody and also deceitfully tried to kill me.
>Episode 2: I had a partner - a woman; with whom we danced in a big party. There were hundreds of guests. She was charming and beautiful. A very special woman. Meanwhile I didn't know her. Suddenly she became mad and started killing guests. At last she deceitfully tried to kill me. The whole hall became the scene to our delicate tactical moves of chase and run.
>Episode 3: A large gathering of magicians and witches. I was being married to a princess (the same previous woman). She was charming and beautiful. She was tyrant and deceitful and killed his enemies with poison or bullet. Meanwhile she was a healer. Crying babies became quiet when she touched their face. We loved each other and all the time we were flying and making love. We both deceived people in coordinated plots and tried to run away.

Funny (wyrd?) that you relate these right now, Sepand, because I just had one last one that fits, rather wyrdly (?) in with the theme of these dreams. Despite its very different settings, characters, props etc., I feel it has a thematic similarity, so, rather than attempting to interpret or analyse yours in any way, I will just add/append it, as "episode 4". Maybe Blue days/nights in the Mayan calendar (i.e. watery/emotionaldays in the 4-day earth-cycle) really do represent times when hidden emotions float to the surface, if we let them... ;-))

Episode 4: In this dream I attend a meeting in my old school library (school as in secondary student, notteacher!), with a group of Gawith Villa clients; we discuss, in a very civilised and orderly manner, among other things, "munchers" (of which we see one drawn in a small cartoon on our agenda), i.e. "monstrous" or predatory people, who might harm or present a danger to us in some way, and suddenly C, normally a very softly-spoken and gentle admin. coordinator, second only to the CEO, comes in and loudly interrupts our meeting, saying something to the effect that "munchers" do not exist, and therefore we find the meeting instantly disbanded, all the clients disappear and go home, and get replaced by a meeting of workers in the library...
An indication of the REAL power-relationships and agendas in this organisation?!! ;-P

>I can't remember the fourth! Claire, what is the hidden relationship that you have identified between the fourth and others?

Our real feelings about the "munchers" that exist out there, i.e. really nasty people; you don't meet them very often, but, if and when you do, it can get really nasty! And their nastiness goes further than just personal, private projection... Mine got typified by a run-in I had online with a "muncher" the other night, a horrible person in a literati chatroom, with whom I had a bit of an altercation, to the point of ignoring them, then retired, thinking it all over; woke up, and guess what? Found a real computer virus downloaded to my PC (first and only time!); thinking all my worst nightmares had come true, I managed to kill the virus with AVG software (it turned out to amount to a nasty Trojan Horse piece of work! ;-P)... But obviously the incident still left me feeling shaken up and vulnerable; just because you don't feel paranoid, doesn't mean "they" won't know where to find you! ;-P

The dream also had a pre-cognitive as well as a post-cognitive aspect, in that, the next day, clients at GV should supposedly have seen a video about disability rights under the new state legislation, as advocated by VALID, a disability rights organisation, only the DVD player would not work properly, due to lack of remote; so that session got quickly disbanded, just like the meeting in my dream! So the fascist, tyrannical side of "munchers" can also get expressed by chronic organisational lack of functional resources, as well as particular "nasty" individuals! ;-P

>I think I know the reason why this dream is in three episodes. If I dreamt this dream before the time I had begun my self-analysis processes and all the magical stuff, it wouldn't last more than one episode. At the end of each episode I am in a serious danger of being killed. At these moments, I - consciously - transformed eachsituation, so the story repeated in a different form.
>Beside these, there is one specific relation between those 3 episodes.In first episode, there is a man I fear and in second, a tyrant beloved. At third episode, I transform into the dreadful man of first episode and my "counterpart", the beloved woman of second episode.Meanwhile we both agree on the quality of being tyrant and this does not make "me" fear anymore as it was in previous episodes.

So, your dream does have a happier ending than mine, Sepand, in that you at least internalise the projection? ;-))

Blue Solar Night dream!

2008-03-12T14:50:00.002+10:00
"I perfect in order to dream,
Producing intuition.
I seal the input of abundance
With the planetary tone of manifestation." (Mayan affirmation of the day)

First dream ever involving fellow workers rather than clients, at GV:

For some strange reason, I stay late at Gawith Villa until it begins to get dark, and then I see M., a fellow worker, stark naked, climbing over a fence; she looks as surprised to see me as I her! I stay still a bit later, and it continues to get darker, and then I see M. and A., this time, both starkers, M. again scaling a fence... I have no idea where she goes, or what goes on on the other side of the fence, because of the darkness.
It feels almost as embarrassing, seeing others naked in a dream, as finding oneself naked! But after a little reflection, I did not find this at all a difficult dream to "crack". Both M. (a lesbian) and A. represent aspects of my life I have not explored, and therefore know nothing about, M. as a woman who dares to love other women, and A., a male, as an artist who also deals professionally with other artists. I might think I know a lot about these areas of life consciously, e.g. from reading "Tipping the Velvet" recently, but I don't really, because I have not experienced them! I finally get a satisfied feeling, as from successfully solving a puzzle, not only at managing to recall a dream at all, but also from the intuitive side, of actually "solving" it! Hence, it feels significant enough to want to record it, in this blog... ;-))

A dream

2008-02-23T10:07:00.001+10:00
I dreamt of Bjorn Erik again last night: here, with me! Only at first he seemed more interested in flirting with an Asian neighbour than with me, and then I worried how to divide up the beer between us, seeing as now I wanted the lion's share for myself!

Dreams of Ordinary Men

2008-01-20T06:12:00.000+10:00
I like this poem; if one can see the relationship between snake and kookaburra in terms of their dynamics of predation/prey, so too can one see the relationship between spider and fly (spider a totem of mine, fly an "animal of the road" that just won't go away!). It reminds me of my hubby Bjorn Erik, also, because, of all Blake's poems, he liked The Fly from Songs of Experience best
;-))

the song Dreams of Ordinary Men by the 80's NZ band Dragon.
------------------------------------------
There is an essence in the water
There is a spirit in the sky
There is a spider drawing webs
To crucify a fly

The fly is drawing nearer
Just as if he knew
How we all must fit the pattern
How the pattern must fit you

Everybody say amen
These are the dreams of ordinary men
This is the world that we'll be living in
Out of the dreams of ordinary men

I mistook all your intentions
But you never did deceive
I have a helpless fascination
For the web you wove for me

We had nightly public beatings
But we slept in private hells
And I feel no guilt or vengeance
We just couldn't help ourselves

So what's the answer I have to find
To change my world like I change my mind
And change my life
If I could only change my dreams

Sometimes, these lyrics make so much more sense when written out as poems, than when you try to listen to them on Rage!

And, by a strange synchronicity, just after this, I just happen to read, in A. S. Byatt's A Whistling Woman: "He also felt an energetic ironic contempt for church life, in which all children were said to be, were, cosmic battlefields, and yet one who heard and saw the horrible forces on the other side of the pane, pain, membrane, brain, that separated him from their full impact, could only be hustled away into a hospital ward, where madmen hummed, and caught at imaginary flies, and hid under their beds, and made missiles of their food" (my emphasis added, in the last lot of italics!).

Elliot Perlman's Seven Types of Ambiguity

2008-01-13T19:10:00.000+10:00
I have just discovered my third great Australian novel (after Tim Winton's Dirt Music and Gregory Roberts' Shantaram, arguably the "War and Peace" of our times!): Elliot Perlman's Seven Types of Ambiguity. And he, too, like the second of these three, comes from Victoria, and not only Victoria, but disturbingly close to home, the inner south-east suburbs of Melbourne, so when he talks about these streets and stuff, I know to what he refers! He writes as I would write, if I could. He writes about things I would like to write about, both global and intensely personal. Like Peter Hoeg, Hendrik Ibsen and Gustave Flaubert ("Madame Bovary, c'est moi!"), although a man, he can describe also the inner subjectivity of women as if one of them. And, yes, he has created characters everyone can relate to, even if the characters themselves vacillate between seeing themselves as Hamlet, or the guy in Kafka's The Trial. Interesting, that he once practised as a barrister himself (hence his intimate acquaintance with the inner workings of the law and court procedure); the law itself also qualifies as a 'literary' career, according to old CES employment posters. He describes people all along the socioeconomic and demagraphic continuum with the uncanny and richly 19thC eye of a Dickens, with Dickens' sense of outrage at social inequities, especially those brought out by the apocalypse of 'globalisation' and so-called 'economic rationalism'. I found it strange that he has no apparent links to psychology or psychiatry himself, but perhaps his own acuity prevents him holding out much hope for the efficacy of any glib 'talking cure' for the things that really trouble us. I heard he got nominated for the Miles Franklin award. I hope he gets it. No one deserves it more!

The true 'braininess' of animals

2008-01-09T08:39:00.000+10:00
I just read something really interesting in Richard Dawkins' The Blind Watchmaker, which I thought I would share with you; it concerns the 'encephalization quotient' or EQ, as worked out and used by Harry Jerison, according to Dawkins, a "leading authority on brain history".

He calculates the EQ in a rather complicated way, so as to eliminate the relative factors of brain and body weight, which suggests the amount of brain 'computing power' left over, after removing the amount of brain required for routine body maintenance; e.g. a whale has a huge body mass, and therefore a huge brain, but this does not mean that all of its brain gets used for computing or thinking, because most of the brain gets taken up just routinely maintaining the body!

Humans have an EQ of 7 according to this measure.
Monkeys are well above average, and apes (including ourselves) even higher.
Squirrels have an EQ of about 1.5, somewhat above...
Rats have an EQ of O.8, slightly below the average for all mammals.
Hippos have an EQ of O.3 (but this may not necessarily mean that humans are 23 times as clever as hippos!).

Unfortunately, no more data on particular species available, but if anyone would care to research these, it might prove really interesting! ;-))

Here's your Daily Poem from the Poetry Chaikhana --

The monkey is reaching
By Hakuin(1686 - 1768)
English version by Norman Waddell

The monkey is reaching
For the moon in the water.
Until death overtakes him
He'll never give up.
If he'd let go the branch and
Disappear in the deep pool,
The whole world would shine
With dazzling pureness.

Harry Potter glossary, dramatis personae and trivia (work in progress)

2008-01-06T16:57:00.000+10:00
There must exist others like me, out there, who, when reading or re-reading the Potter books, occasionally get lost and Confounded by the plethora of characters, creatures and specialised magical terminology, and I can only wish J. K. Rowling herself had bothered to supply such a list at the back of her books, especially as they got longer and more complicated! I present it here, folks, for all your Harry Potter trivia needs, a humble tribute to the works themselves:

Aberforth and Ariana = Albus Dumbledore's siblings
Abraxas Malfoy = Draco's grandfather, died of
dragonpox
"Accio..." = to get something
"Aguamenti" = fill with water
Alastor Moody = better known as "Mad Eye"
Albert Runcorn = used by Harry as a disguise in the Ministry of Magic
"Alohomora" = open sesame (except when bewitched)
Amortentia = the most powerful love-potion in the
world
"Anapneos" = unchoking spell
Apolline dela Cour = Fleur's maman
Arabella Figg = Harry's Squib neighbour
Aragog = head of the Acromantula
Arkie Alderton = "a well-known broomstick designer", at least according to his half-blood son, whom this did not save from the Dementors.
Auntie Muriel Weasley = 107 years old, famed for
her goblin tiara; loves Rita Skeeter and friendly
with Bathilda Bagshot, i.e. an old gossip
"Avada Kedavra" = death-curse, with which Snape
killed Dumbledore
Bathilda Bagshot = historian, author of A History of Magic; once lived in Godric's Hollow, Gryffindor, where the Dumbledores had lived, and James and Lily Potter lay buried
Burrow, The = Weasley residence, hard by the
village of Ottery St Catchpole
Charity Burbage = Muggle Studies teacher at
Hogwarts
Carrow, Alecto = took over her position on Snape's "appointment" as headmaster
Carrow, Amycus = her brother, took over position of Defence against the Dark Arts professor
"Confringo!" = to cause an explosion
Crookshanks = Hermione's ginger cat
Crumple-horned Snorkacks = what Xenophilius and
Luna go searching for on holiday
Dean Thomas = not sure if he really had a Muggle parent; member of Gryffindor.
"Descendo" = to make something come down
Dittany = a cure for Splinching
Egbert the Egregious, Emeric the Evil = previous owners of the Elder Wand; Godelot died in a cellar when his son Hereward took it from him; Loxias took it from Barnabus Deverill, becoming an owner in the line of Arcus and Livius
Elphias Doge = member of the Order of the Phoenix,
writer of Dumbledore's obituary; nicknamed "Dogbreath" at school
Enid Smeek = a nosy neighbour who lived on the outskirts of Godric's Hollow
"Episkey" = mends broken nose
Ernie Prang = driver of Knight Bus, after Stan
Shunpike
"Expelliarmus!" = to get rid of something
Fawkes, Dumbledore's phoenix
Felix felicis = liquid luck
Fenrir Greyback = the Death-Eating werewolf
Firenze = a centaur
Flourish and Botts = bookstore in Diagon Alley
Fred and George Weasley = invented Peruvian Instant
Darkness powder
Gabrielle dela Cour = Fleur's petite soeur
Gellert Grindelwald = carved his sign, a triangular
eye, into the wall of Durmstrang (Viktor Krum)
"Geminio" = duplicate
Gernumbli gardensi = correct name of garden gnomes,
according to Xenophilius Lovegood; contact may
impart an unexpected urge to sing opera or declaim
in Mermish
Ginevra ("Ginnie") Weasley = tried to take (fake) Sword of Gryffindor from Snape's office.
Grawp = Hagrid's half-brother
Gregorovich = Ollivander's wand-making counterpart in Viktor Krum's country
Grimmauld Place (#12) = Harry's old house,
inherited from Sirius Black
Griphook and Gornuk = goblins, known to associate with Ted Tonks.
Gurdyroot = really good for warding off Gulping; purple like beetroot
Plimpies, according to Luna
Harry James Potter, never a good Occlumens, but
inherited the Snitch caught in his first Quidditch
match, and Godric's Sword of Gryffindor from
Dumbledore
Hermione Jean Granger, inherited Dumbledore's Tales
of Beedle the Bard
Ignotus Peverill = buried at Godric's Hollow; along with the other two Peverill brothers, Antioch and Cadmus, one of Harry's ancestors
Inferi = (roughly) zombies
Kendra = Dumbledore's mother
Lancelot = a healer at St Mungo's
"Langlock!" = shut up
Libatius Borage = author of Potions textbook
Lily Potter = a dab hand at Potions; Muggle-born
"Lumos" = summons light
Madame Malkin = proprietress of robe shop in Diagon
Alley
Mafilda Hopkirk = assistant in the Improper Use of Magic office, whom Hermione used as a disguise
Mary Elizabeth Cattermole = wife of Reg (q.v.) of the Magical Maintenance Department, mother to Maisie, Ellie and Alfred.
"Merlin's beard, trousers, etc." = mild expletives
Mermish = merpeople's language
Nymphadora Tonks = daughter of Bellatrix's sister
Percival Dumbledore = Albus' father
"Petrificus totalus" = freeze!
Phineas Nigellus Black = former headmaster of Slytherin; portrait in Sirius Black's house
Pius Thicknesse = puppet Minister of Magic under You-Know-Who
Polyjuice Potion = to disguise oneself as someone
else, e.g. when Harry disguised himself as
red-haired 'Cousin Barney', a boy from Ottery St
Catchpole, to attend Bill and Fleur's wedding
Professor Minerva McGonagall, head of Gryffindor
Professor Horace Slughorn, head of Slytherin
Professor Pomana Sprout, head of Hufflepuff
Professor Flitwick, head of Ravenclaw
Professor Vector, Arithmancy teacher
"Protego" = Shield charm
Quibbler, The = a rag started by Xenophilius Lovegood, in opposition to the Daily Prophet, and, to his credit, the last issue did not contain a single mention of Crumple-horned Snorkacks!
"Quid agis?" = what goes on?
Reg Cattermole = used by Ron as a disguise in the Ministry of Magic
"Rennervate" = to ressuscitate
"Reparo" = to fix anything
Rita Skeeter = scurrilous tabloid journalist; wrote
a highly unauthorised biography of Dumbledore,
reputed to contain less fact than a Chocolate Frog
Ronald Bilius Weasley = inherited Dumbledore's
Deluminator
Rufus Scrimgeour = Minister of Magic after
Cornelius Fudge (of the lime-green bowler hat)
"Sectumsempra" = against foes, a favorite of Snape
Sopophorus bean = an ingredient in Felix felicis
"Specialis revelio!" = to reveal the secrets of
something
Ted Tonks = Nymphadora's father
"Tergeo" = washing spell
Tom = landlord of the Leaky Cauldron; do not confuse with Thomas Marvolo Riddle, the real name of He-Whom-You-Must-Not-Name
"Wendell and Monica Wilkins" = the names given by
Hermione to her parents, when she charmed them into emigrating to
Australia and forgetting all about her
William Arthur Weasley = savaged by Fenrir, m.
Fleur Isabelle dela Cour; works for Gringott's bank.
"Wingardium leviosa!" = to levitate something
Wrackspurt = what Luna resembles when dancing; has siphons like ear-trumpets to remove all traces of distraction, and Billywig propellers (wings) to induce an elevated state of mind; orange Dirigible plum also helps one to accept the extraordinary!

And if that does not seem enough to get anyone re-reading at least the last two books, I don't know what will!

P.S. Neither Hello nor Picasa work anymore for uploading pictures, so unfortunately I can no longer supply them!

2008-01-04T06:15:00.000+10:00
http://www.necronomi.com/projects/666/

A "homeless" item looking for a good home...

2007-12-25T06:11:00.002+10:00
After the successful despatch of Nards' homeless vibrator, I have decided to give you another conundrum to wrap your creative and ingenious thinking caps around...

Yes, it happens to the best of us at Christmas: the sad fact of a totally unwanted and unwarranted gift from an otherwise very beloved person!

Guess what my hubby sent me this year?

After keeping it pristine in its gold wrapping with gold rosette for weeks in anticipation, I finally opened it this morning...

Shock, horror! A glow-in-the-dark Ouija board game!

(Now, in case you don't know, the Ouija board has a bit of a history with me and Bjorn Erik, in that in Norway he begged to go to Witchy Bitchy occult/metaphysical paraphernalia shop, and buy one, and we did. He tried and tried to get an answer out of the damned thing, and I just felt sillier and sillier, feeling his fingers move the damned thing! He became more and more obsessed, and, when he finally got hospitalised, I asked online what I should do with it, and others said to dump it in the trash, which I could not do without Bjorn Erik's permission, since it came of his idea anyway, so I asked him, and he gave permission to dump it in the trash... Now he gives me something he really wants himself? ;-P)

I could send it back unopened to Norway, but would find the return cost of postage prohibitive...

I have never sold or bought anything on ebay, and would not have a clue how to go about it.

Any ideas?

The Lady in Blue

2007-12-09T18:17:00.000+10:00
http://www.theladyinblue.net/

I know many of my contacts will find this fascinating stuff...
Nice website; I have just read the novel. Fact or fiction, who knows? Javier
Sierra himself calls it "a novel", but it does seem a (g)ripping yarn that he felt
strangely compelled to tell... Bigger than Dan Brown's Da Vinci Codes? I hope so, cos this unassuming, and very cute, Spanish guy has a modesty unlike
Dan Brown's, and obviously does not want anyone to think him crazy... Read, see, discover, and think for yourselves... and remember, you heard it here first! ;-))

Doris Lessing, this year's Nobel laureate in literature... alas!

2007-11-27T14:11:00.000+10:00
>Doris Lessing "that epicist of the female experience, who with scepticism, fire and visionary power has subjected a divided civilisation to scrutiny".

Did she get this year's Nobel prize for The Cleft? If so, then I do not find her the epicist of MY female experience, but rather as boring, stupid and pretentious as I feared!

This, her most recent "novel" (2007) has no believable, identifiable characters, since it reduces all the personages to 'archetypes', or rather pasteboard stereotypes. It has no plot, because its timeframe uneasily straddles the great divide between historical time (ancient Rome) and evolutionary, or uncountable, time. I wonder if she intends it as mythology, anthropology or science fiction? As any of the above genres, she has failed abysmally, in her pomposity, imho! ;-P

Therefore it has no meaningful emotional tension to speak of, as evolutionary time does not willingly allow confinement within the parameters of a novel framework, however "post-modern" the intention. I find her story about as meaningless and unbelievable as the Bible itself; did she set out to write her own "Bible", I wonder? If so, then she has succeeded, because she has achieved a tour-de-force as meaningless and unbelievable as I already find the Bible!

Moral of this story? Do NOT let Swedish prize-givers choose your reading material for you!!! ;-P

YAY!!!

2007-11-24T18:50:00.000+10:00

R.I.P. (rot in pieces), Louie the Fly!!!

Turning Descartes on his head

2007-11-22T19:46:00.000+10:00
Descartes's "proof" of the existence of god turned into its contrary:

(1) Nothing that exists has perfection, i.e. you will always find a fly in the ointment somewhere (Buddha's first, and imho, most indisputable truth!) ;-))

(2) god = the idea of perfection

(3) Therefore, god cannot exist (except as an idea!) LMAO

Shadow totems

2007-11-07T05:27:00.000+10:00
Shadow totems? Hmm, hard for me, since, imho, people who hate snakes and spiders simply "have no soul"... lol!

But your mentioning nightmares gave it to me... the rat! (Not too crazy about mice either, the thought of small, swarming, seething rodent hoards under the floorboards just gives me creeps!)

Strange, because in other ways, rats and mice (at a distance) seem quite cute, warm, furry, warm-blooded, and you have to love a mouse's small, glistening, bright eyes... I could respect one guy's affection for his pet rat when he held it, although I could not; with mice, the thought that, if you see one in your house, means that ten others lurk beneath the floorboards, drove me (because I still do not like the unnecessary cruelty of poison, even in their case, and the thought of having to dispose of a trap with a dead rodent body in it just gave me the heebie-jeebies) to borrow the mouse's natural predator, a CAT!!! And at that point, the cat and I really bonded, as the cat supplied me with Tom-and-Jerry cartoons of ruthless efficiency in disposing of mice... hehe ;-))

I could tolerate mice in a small mouse house for my son, then at kindergarten age, but when they gnawed through the chipboard and escaped, I felt happy to pass it on to the local kindergarten as a 'donation', then to become their problem...

Rats became my nightmare on reading Camus' The Plague in Year 12; I also picked up my Norwegian mother-in-law's worst nightmare, in Norway, of rats tumbling out of a hole in the wall... Interestingly, a common species of rat, along with 'Rattus rattus', gets called 'rattus norvegicus'? Perhaps an encapsulation and anticipation of the traumatic, as opposed to idyllic, aspects of my whole Norwegian experience?

In other ways, I respect their intelligence, so like our own, and the fact that they alone, along with cockroaches (*shudder!*) stand to inherit the earth in the event of catastrophe...

Strangely enough, I have rat, in a perfect Chinese trine, with monkey and dragon in my Chinese horoscope. Something about "the perpetual student" in me, greedy, but more so for knowledge rather than food... I would love to have a rat suck up to me, and fawn on me, as monkeys famously suck up to, and fawn on, dragons... ;-))

I still don't like them much, but I respect them more and more as a shadow totem every day ;-))

OK, enough about mine; your shadow totems, anybody? ;-))

Another must-read book: When Elephants Weep

2007-10-05T06:55:00.000+10:00
I have just finished another must-read book, for when you have the time (!): When Elephants Weep, by Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson, exploring the emotional lives of animals, and by a psychiatrist, of all people (!), covering all manner of ethobiological and sociobiological data! And also this book ties in interestingly, at the end, with the next book on my list, Richard Dawkins' The Selfish Gene ;-))

It would almost make me go vegetarian, except that my body recoils from the thought of never, ever eating meat again, as it does also from the thought of never drinking another beer, or smoking a smoke again! I now have a bad case of what social psychologists would call "cognitive dissonance", i.e. my body wants it, while my mind and emotions clamour against it! (Interestingly, cognitive dissonance itself, of which smokers normally have more than their fair share, got instantly cured, when, at the cinema in Norway, after a social psych. lecture on, precisely that, cognitive dissonance, I saw an anti-smoking ad that proclaimed, "1 in 2 smokers die of smoking", and I thought happily, "I can live with those odds!" Cognitive consonance instantly restored! lol)

But the vegetarian debating loudly in my stubbornly non-vegetarian body will not go away... After that book, which systematically demolishes everything that supposedly separates us from other animals, even Terry Pratchett's much-vaunted narrative or story-telling abilities (the signing experiments with great apes hardly having exploited the apes' full potential in this regard, due to the signing limitations of their human trainers?), and those suggested by Darwin himself, blushing, crying etc. (yes, I did look into the eyes of an elephant shackled in a circus once, and thought them the saddest eyes ever, very moist with tears, and the tigers and panthers restlessly pacing in their cages did not look too happy either; hopefully that same elephant later dumped its half a ton of elephant dung right in the centre of the ring! lol)...

Perhaps one distinguishing feature remains, after all? We represent the only species that can still EAT OTHER ANIMALS, WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY FEELING GUILTY ABOUT IT??? Do dogs feel guilt about eating meat, or dolphins about eating fish, I wonder? Do spiders feel guilt about eating flies and other insects, for all their other wonderful qualities, like web-spinning and even care of their young spiderlings, at least in the case of the wolf spider? And don't talk to me about the much-vaunted "saintliness" and guru-like qualities of dolphins: like chimpanzees (our lot!), for all their occasional compassion, altruism and empathy (like us!), they can also demonstrate quite mean and aggressive behavior, and have even raped members of their own species! ;-P

Actually, the one species that could so far come close to our own in the narrative or storytelling department could amount to the great cetaceans, in particular the humpbacked whale, whose "songs" some researchers have studied and found to represent basically the same stories each year, with minor, critical variations, i.e. do they really retell the history of the world, or at least their own species, with updates?

So what do you think? Does this guilt as carnivore/omnivore characterise that which alone sets us apart from the other animals? I think of Lewis Carroll's poem The Walrus and the Carpenter, and find parts of me enacting ALL characters in it, in the manner of a psychodrama: the walrus (who doesn't want to eat the oysters), the carpenter (who does)... and even the little, helpless oysters themselves?? ;-P

Deadly Tarot?

2007-10-01T17:45:00.000+10:00
You gotta laugh at one episode of Inspector Rex (series 5, episode 12), in which a serial killer plans his killings by the Tarot... the Tower means I must throw someone off a high building, 3 of Swords means I must stab him mortally three times; the Chariot means a death by vehicle, of some description! lol

P.S. According to that episode, the Wheel of Fortune means, "You had better hurry out and buy some ham rolls, or a terrible fate will befall you!" lol

Harry Potter and the moral education of children and adults alike!

2007-08-08T17:31:00.000+10:00
I feel so excited; I have finally managed to get hold of a copy of the long-awaited HP and the Deathly Hallows, courtesy of my friendly, local Malvern library! Of course, I have not finished it yet, barely begun, in fact, and I want to drag it out as long as possible to fully savour the experience... But in the meantime, I would like to take some time out to blog some of my reflections on the book, and the series, so far... ;-))
Children and adults both love it, and for different reasons, I think. Of course, children may miss some of the subtexts, which adults can pick up (as they probably also do with the Simpsons, in fact), but in the sub-texts lies, I believe, the real moral value of the work. Of course, it does not come across as "moral" in the preachy, didactic sense, and a good thing, too, or that would defeat its purpose, and turn everybody off! But, nevertheless, its subtexts contain a deep vein of morality and values for the 21st century, and therein lies its genius: hopefully these values will rub off, by osmosis, so to speak, on children and adults alike... ;-))
We meet a number of interesting characters and creatures throughout the series. We meet the house-elves (subtext: oppressed and enslaved workers who do not even realise the extent of their oppression and slavery: Hermione tries in vain to "raise their consciousness" to some sort of class struggle)... ;-P
We meet the werewolves: in particular the engaging Professor Lupin (subtext: homosexuality as a behaviorally unalterable condition that makes it impossible for him to continue at Hogwarts despite his tenderly affectionate and even paternal relationship to the young Harry)... ;-P
We meet those denigrated as "Mudbloods" by the cold and supercilious Slytherians, in particular our co-heroine Hermione (subtext: racism in all its forms)... ;-P
In the seventh book we also get to hear of a "Squib" (magically deficient wizard looked down upon by other more proficient wizards), the very sister of Dumbledore in fact, who suffered, interestingly enough, the "inverse fate" of Harry himself, finding herself locked up and hidden away by a wizard family, as his Muggle family had locked him up and hidden him away (subtext: intellectual disability)...
Hmm, do you see the moral and political agenda emerging yet, as I do?
One of my fellow disability workers agrees with all of this and identifies "He Who Must Not Be Named" as Hitler himself, and if we equate Voldemort with Hitler, then this seventh book must surely equate to the "holocaust", as the Mudbloods get rounded up, and everyone must have certificates of "racial purity", etc. Truly scary stuff! The Ministry of Magic overtaken and infiltrated by the Death Eaters now becomes Hitler's Nazi Party... ! ;-P
Of course, the Nazis liked to see themselves as all very "scientific" with their policy of racial purity, but we know it now to amount to a very dubious form of "pseudo-science" at best. Because the very idea of "racial purity" amounts to a form of evolutionary suicide. To deprive a breed, any breed, of a diversity of genes in its gene pool, is to shoot itself in the foot. For example, Eurasians seem smarter on the whole than either Europeans or Asians; mongrel dogs seem much smarter and better balanced on the whole than purebred dogs. Consider the very inbred European royal families (the Danish princess Mary at least brings an evolutionary breath of fresh air into this dismal picture!). I cannot for the life of me see why people, except out of a misguided sense of snobbery, would want to spend large amounts of money for a "purebred" dog, when they actually purchase a bunch of hereditary defects that will end up costing them even more money in the long run; you would seem far better off heading down to the local pound to pick up a regular, unwanted mongrel, who would in the end turn out healthier, smarter, less neurotic and a better dog all around, for life, and a better life span at that!
At first, in the beginning of book 7, the equation of werewolves with homosexuality, at least, seemed suddenly on shaky ground, when Lupin wanted to get married (I just thought, "What the...?"). But then that particular subtext confirmed itself yet again, when no sooner had he fathered a child with Tonk, than he wanted, strangely, just to take off with Harry Potter again... My lesbian friend assures me that Tonk in fact can look after, not only herself, but also her child, and has her own agenda! ;-))
Interestingly, Lupin, in the subtext, slightly ego-dystonic, i.e. a not very "happy gay", seems concerned that any child of his may also equate to "half-werewolf", i.e. he has concerns for a possible genetic component to his condition. The idea of a possible genetic component in homosexuality seems a two-edged sword for gays. On the one hand, if we do discover a gene definitely linked to homosexuality, hard-core homophobes will want to abort any child carrying the gene... as they might also want to abort any child carrying a gene for certain disabilities! On the other hand, the religious right may just find itself hoist with its own petard, and itself wondering whether to "abort or not to abort" a child who almost inevitably will commit what they regard as an "abominable sin"... They may well find the joke on them, and gays may well find themselves completely off the hook, for simply following the genetic dictates of their own nature... ;-))
You can preach against the evils of all these forms of discrimination till you get blue in the face, and, as long as people continue to cling to their ignorant stereotypes, history seems bound to repeat itself in all manner of "holocausts". But, as long as J.K.Rowling continues her "good fight" (much as she did in her 19thC past life as Charles Dickens, imho?), the consciousness of the masses will continue to rise with her leaven, disguised in the cunning form of a ripping good yarn... Interestingly, this time around, she does not need to churn as many books as she did as Charles Dickens (who himself singlehandedly instigated many much-needed reforms with his books, as the reforms of the notorious "poor boys' schools" in the north of England, with Nicholas Nickleby, for example), having got all her moral and political agenda down pat in a well-crafted series of seven ripping yarns! And, hopefully, as it leavens the consciousness of present and future generations alike, we need never repeat such unfortunate historical episodes as the holocaust, because people's moral natures will instinctively recoil from their premises... "Nie wieder!" The self-righteous fundamentalists who want to ban these books from their children's libraries, hearts and minds, do not realise the injustice they do their own children, by depriving them of a moral and political education based on real, as opposed to merely theological and religious values!

A midsummer/midwinter night's dream

2007-07-05T06:42:00.000+10:00
Wow! Phew! Hats off to Shakespeare, and all who bring him to life again!I have just seen the latest Hollywood version of A Midsummer Night's Dream, and found it a rare treat, even in midwinter (I feel sure Shakespeare himself would appreciate the irony of that!) ;-))

As I said before to the wyrdlings, "stellar" cast, with Kevin Kline as Bottom, Michelle Pfeiffer as Titania (yes, their "love-scene" I found well worth the wait!), and Calista Flockhart as Helena (remember the little elfin-faced girl in Sex and the City?), a very suffering suffragette, on a bicycle... Mortals have their bicycles, but the fairies love their stolen gramophones! lol

Brilliantly set at the turn of the 19thC, to bring it slightly forward to our contemporary awareness from Shakespeare's day, and yet able to keep, at the same time, a suitably "period" flavor... ;-))

I found the mud-wrestling scene between Helena and Hermia a stroke of genius, to show mortals at their lowest ebb of degradation, abandonment and confusion... "Lo, what fools these mortals be!" (Puck summed it up so nicely) ;-))

I also found Shakespeare very much inserting himself, as dramatic artist, into this one, in the person of Bottom, the Weaver, note, i.e. the "weaver" of dreams and illusions on stage. He begins yearning for more convincing illusions in the absence of special "FX", hence all the hooha about the "wall", in the "play within a play", which idea seems to me his idea of what we now get in those "movie extras" attached to DVDs: little asides, and glimpses behind the scenes of the actual production! He also, in that "play within a play", has a go at the ludicrousness of having boys sprouting beards, and with their voices breaking, play the female leads... So he obviously also wished for genuine females to play the female leads. And in his own "dream"... Ah! "It shall be called 'Bottom's dream... because it has no bottom!" he hints at serious mysteries (his take on Apuleius' Golden Ass?), thereby rounding out this robust tribute to paganism in all its aspects, from the most commonplace and mundane (Robin Goodfellow and the fairies) to the most esoteric and 'high' magick... You gotta love the 'fairies', a skilful combination of pre-Raphaelite grace, and classical, faun-like robustness (note Puck's own horns AND pointed, elfin ears!). While Bottom himself, with his moustache and little goatee beard, I found strongly, even physically, reminiscent of the bard himself. And of course, "all's well that ends well", and even the actors of their ludicrous little pantomime, still hilarious after all these years (although intending to portray a "tragedy"! lol), got their little "Oscars", in the form of gold medals from the Duke... You get the feeling that mortals, as artists, become most godlike when making complete asses of themselves (and this a long time before Shrek and his annoying sidekick! lol), and the play or the movie itself becomes for the masses what the dream becomes to the individual... I speak in riddles, even to myself, but even Bottom found himself "riddling" to himself on awaking from his dream... And as Bottom presented the first disclaimer in the play within a play, so Puck presented the first disclaimer in the overall play?... How far ahead of his time could a playwright get? (Shakespeare at least as far ahead of his time in this, anticipating the special FX his plays deserved, as Georges Seurat anticipating pixellated computer graphics in the fine arts?) ;-))

What can you not love about it? I would nominate this the "Best Pagan Movie" of the year, if such a category existed! ;-))

Postcard from Bjorn Erik

2007-06-18T15:36:00.000+10:00
For accompanying words, see Bjorn Erik's blog!

Eurovision 2007

2007-05-13T19:39:00.000+10:00
No longer finding myself in Europe, my spiritual home (sadly) and therefore unable to vote, I record my points and comments here (thank you, Helsinki, for that wonderful Hard Rock Hallelujah, from the home of Tolkien's original inspiration for Lord of the Rings; truly a hard act to follow, whether or not you like LOTR!)

Rumania: nice gypsy guitar (did Django Reinhardt come from Rumania?)... Romantic, with humor... I would like these guys serenading me in a gypsy restaurant... o O, dance factor!!! I like the multilingualism also! 9.5/10... No, stuff it, give 'em 10!!!***
Bulgaria: doing what Belaruss, or the Ukraine, did a couple of years ago... Cool; haunting, shamanic drums... very magical, and literally spellbinding?! Wendy Rule, with attitude!!! (Not that Wendy herself lacks this!) 10/10***
Belarus... loved 'em a couple of years ago... intense, hot... I don't want to lose this feeling, either! "Work your magic", Belarus! Very catchy, and magical... I feel their magic working on me... It made me get up and dance (extra points!) 9.5/10
Ukraine... Dance factor, with an extraterrestrial flavor!!! Get down, Ukraine!!! 9.5/10
(Once again, I seem to favor the Slavic countries, so chuck another vodka glass in the fireplace, and "Nitchevo!")
Macedonia... Impossible to stay seated for this one also... 9.5/10
Bosnia-Herzegovina... prayer for forgiveness... musically nice... loses points for awful dress... 8/10
Spain... boy band... belt buckles and thrusting trousers, all in white... bleahh... 3/10
Ireland... as always, it brings tears (of joy, or sorrow?) to the eyes... 8.5/10
Slovenia... Wow! Another Wendy Rule... loses points for excruciating upper register... Nice costume, shame about the music with operatic pretensions (it gives me a headache)... 4/10
Hungary... I hate it when Europeans try to sound like American C&W singers... Ee-oww, the screeching! 2/10
Lithuania... very mellow... you could enjoy it as musical "wallpaper" at sunset, virtually anywhere in the world... 8.5/10
Greece... Disco has not died? Someone should lay it to rest... 4/10
Georgia... Some people just should not try to sing in English! Or indeed, to sing at all... ;-P 2 points for the whirling Cossack dancing! 2+2 =4/10
Sweden (the country that had the gall to win Eurovision '99 with a remix of ABBA! Aaarrrggghhh!!!)... I do like the androgynous makeup... but otherwise, R.I.P., disco, again! 7/10
France... The French do a lot of things well, but not sing! When they sing franglais, it sounds even worse! 3/10
Latvia... Singing in Italian, because it probably sounds a whole lot better like that: not the three tenors, but very cute for all that... 7/10
Russia... this gives Russia the reputation of Europe's sluttish schoolgirls? Do they actually fellate those mikes? 3/10
Germany... Nice, very cool bit of swing (shame about the upper register, again!)... 7/10
Serbia... Nice; Serbia's answer to k.d.laing? I guess I kinda like moody lesbians! Very pure upper register... I too wish I knew what all that involved! 9/10
UK: eeecchh, more headache material! (Pass the cold compresses and the aspirin!) They do for Eurovision what British Airways does for the skies... pollution?! And, no, showing your tits will get you nowhere, at least, I hope not!
;-P 2/10
Turkey: belly dancing disco-style?! Lacks the dignity and passion of their winning belly-dancing entry a few years ago, which I did back... Sorry, Turkey; with British belly-dancers, it just does not seem the real thing... 4/10
Armenia: beautifully sung ballad... nice panpipes... got me singing (sing-along factor!)... 8.5/10
Moldova: more passionate gypsy violins!!! Tres exotique... definite haunting ambience... shame it had to degenerate into disco pyrotechnics... and screeching upper register... eeccchh! 6/10
****************************************************************************************************************
At least, the Spanish voters share my taste, and vote for Bulgaria and Rumania, with me, despite their own appalling entry! And B.-H. gives its vote to Serbia... Eurovision knows no boundaries (much!). I love it, how people vote very much within their neighbourhoods... and yet it still pans out differently every time? Anyone care to give a mathematical analysis of the Eurovision voting? lol
At least Israel gives its 12 points to Belaruss!... Looks like my runner-up (Serbia) may = a Eurovision winner, for the very first time?
o O... how does Norway vote? Hungary (8), Serbia (10), and o O... Sweden (12)?!! lol
Sweden MUST vote outside of Scandinavia; Hungary(8), Serbia(10), Finland...(12)... the closest they could find to Scandinavia?! lol
Iceland also forced to discover Finland, by Scandinavian default...! lol
***************************************************************************************************************
SERBIA WINS!!! (Who said you had to have a conventionally pretty face, to win Eurovision?! Actually, she does not look that bad, second time around! That may = the beer goggles talking? lol)

Why don't they ever tell us the place-getters at the end? Cos no one remembers a loser? ;-P

Complete madness, of course... I don't know why it sucks me in every year, but it does! lol

Let Finland have the last word again, for this year: "I gotta go crazy, just to stay sane!"

I miss bears!!!

2007-05-08T20:38:00.000+10:00
OK, Usch (German for "little bear", from the Latin Ursula), I know you won't read this, because you despise online communications, but I miss you, because:

(1) the spangled drongo turned up on the Einstein Factor on Sunday, as a real bird, and I still have your drawing of it (if the Americans have a "star-spangled banner", why can't we have a spangled drongo?)

(2) Uncle Bob's place in downtown Armadale, totally French, "chez Bob", offers, among its other culinary offerings, "legumes oublies", "forgotten vegetables", would you believe?

(3) I got 6 out of 6 in my footy tipping this round, round 6... 666... descending minor chords, please! lol
(Sorry, I got that bit wrong - totally mathematically innumerate klutz as I find myself; I actually got 6/8, as everyone tried to tell me, but I assumed, when NAB footy tipping called it "outstanding", that that meant a perfect score! Still, 6 out of 6 in round 6 has a much better ring, don't you agree? lol)

Of course, I also miss the bear Bjorn ("Bear") Erik, who left a gaping hole in my life...

Where have all the bears gone?

2007-05-08T20:14:00.000+10:00
Fossil range: Early Miocene - Recent

Kodiak Brown Bear
Scientific classification
Kingdom:
Animalia
Phylum:
Chordata
Class:
Mammalia
Order:
Carnivora
Suborder:
Caniformia
Family:
UrsidaeG. Fischer de Waldheim, 1817

The incidence of religious psychosis across religious denominations?

2007-02-21T15:27:00.000+10:00
This question interests me, because I have the hypothesis that Catholics, with a higher degree of institutionalized neurosis than Protestants, on the whole, would therefore experience a relatively lower incidence of full-blown religious psychosis, because their institutionalized neuroticism would keep a lid on it, so to speak...
So far, the article that comes closest to answering this question, from my googling so far, with some solid facts and figures, and statistical analysis, seems this one:
http://www.dukespiritualityandhealth.org/research/outside/outsideM.html

(Some excerpts only!)

"MacDonald, C.B., & Luckett, J.B. (1983). Religious affiliation and psychiatric diagnoses. Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, 22, 15-37. (C/S survey of relationship between religious affiliation (33 types) and psychiatric diagnosis in 7,050 persons terminated from a mid-western psychiatric clinic between 1977-1980; "no religious preference" had the highest proportion of alcoholics, the 2nd highest proportion of drug dependence, but the least number of neurotics, and few marital maladajustment and adjustment reactions (and low rates of anxiety and OCD); "non-mainline Protestants" had the most neuroses (higher rates of depression and OCD) and most adjustment reactions, but the least drug dependence and least alcoholism; mainline protestants had the highest marital adjustment problems and relatively low rates of alcoholism, but high rates of hysterical personality disorder; Catholics had less alcoholism and slightly more neuroses (but high rates of OCD); sects had high rates of psychosis (uncontrolled chi-square associations!!); of particular note is that 43% of the sample reported "No Religious Preference" (compared with 8% nationally), especially given the mid-western location of the study)
"Mackenbach, J.P., Kunst, A.E., Devrij, J.H., & VanMeel, D. (1993). Self-reported morbidity and disability among Trappist and Benedictine monks. American Journal of Epidemiology, 138, 569-573. (case-control study of monks at 7 monasteries in Netherlands, with 134 responses (67%); compared rates of morbidity and disability among monks with all Dutch males by standardized morbidity ratios (SMR), adjusting for age and education; SMR was similar for monks and non-monks (SMR 1.07), but disability by ADL impairment was much higher for 7 of 10 ADLs assessed, after adjustments for age; for trouble sitting down and getting up from chair, SMR was 2.21 (95% CI 1.44-3.32); concluded that a prudent lifestyle may prolong life, but at expense of higher disability)
"MacKenzie, G., & Blaney, R. (1985). Further correlates of problem drinking in Northern Ireland from a population study. International Journal of Epidemiology, 14 (3), 410-414. (C/S survey of probability sample of 3,755 community-dwelling adults in Northern Ireland (1783 males, 1972 females); regression analysis found that male drinkers more likely to be Catholic; no discussion of religious finding)
*[MacLean, C.R.K., Walton, K.G., Wenneberg, S.R., Levitsky, D.K., Nandarino, J.V., Waziri, R., & Schneider, R.H. (1994). Altered responses of cortisol, GH, TSH and testosterone to acute stress after four months' practice of transcendental meditation (TM). Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, 746, 381-384.]
"Maes, H. H., Neale, MC, Martin, NG, Heath, AC, Eaves, L. J. (1999). Religious attendance and frequency of alcohol use: same genes or same environments: a bivariate extended twin kinship model. Twin Research, 2, 169-179. (Investigators examined whether the inverse relationship between religious attendance and alcohol use was driven by genetic or environmental factors. Data on these two variables were attained from twins and their families in the Virginia 30,000 study. A bivariate model of family resemblance was fitted to the data using Mx. Results indicated that genetic factors primarily account for the relationship between alcohol and church attendance in males, while shared environmental factors, including cultural transmission and genotype-environment covariance, are stronger determinants of this association in women.
"Magaletta, P.R., Duckro, P.N., & Staten, S.F. (1997). Prayer in office practice: On the theshold of integration. Journal of Family Practice, 44, 254-256. (opinion, discussion: Physicians must pay close attention to patients' varying levels of intimacy and mutual willingness for discussion when addressing these issues and/or acting on them. For example, the patients' wishes must be considered before the physician offers his or her own private prayers. If the physician would prescribe prayer for the patient, then he/she must be cautious this does not increase the patient's sense of guilt or fear of a poor prognosis.)
"Magee, J.J. (1987). Determining the predictors of life satisfaction among retired nuns: Report from a pilot project. Journal of Religion and Aging, 4(1), 39-49. C/S survey of a "random" sample of 150 retired nuns aged 71-85 in New York (method of sampling was not given); life satisfaction measured by Life Satisfaction Index-Z scale; 30.7% with high life satisfaction, 50% as moderate LS, and 19% as low LS; multiple regression used to identify predictors of life satisfaction; holding an administrative or governance position in one's congregation before retiring (the only religious variable measured) was significantly related to LS (p<.05) when list-wise regression used, but this association disappeared when step-wise regression used)
"Mahoney, A., Pargament, K. I, Jewell, T., Swank, A. B., Scott, E., Emery, E., Rye, M. (1999). Marriage and the spiritual realm: the role of proximal and distal religious constructs in marital functioning. Journal of Family Psychology, 13, 321-328. (97 couples completed questionnaires about their joint religious activities and perceptions regarding the sanctification of marriage, such as perceived sacred qualities of marriage and beliefs about the manifestation of God in marriage (proximal religious constructs). Individual religiousness and religious homogamy (distal religious constructs) did not predict marital outcomes as strongly as proximal religious constructs. Proximal religious variables were associated with greater global marital adjustment, perceived benefits from marriage, less marital conflict, more verbal collaboration, and less use of verbal aggression and stalemate to discuss disagreements. Proc small measures added substantial unique variance (R-square change) ranging from .06 to .48 after controlling for demographic factors and distal religious variables.
"Mallory, M. (1977). Christian Mysticism: Transcending Techniques. Amsterdam: Van Gorcum Assen (don't have it) (44 nuns and 9 friars from a Carmelite order whose primary activity is contemplative prayer; mysticism scores correlated positively with extraversion (r=0.23) and happiness (r=0.41); prayers associated with rational processes, however, were significantly correlated with mental distress); in a subsample of 14 enlisted for EEG recordings during prayer, a significant reduction in alpha abundance during prayer was found (p<.04), although this study was criticized for her use of statistical techniques)
"Maltby, J. (1997). Personality correlates of religiosity among adults in the Republic of Ireland. Psychological Reports, 81 (3, Part 1), 827-831.
Malzberg, B. (1973). Mental disease among Jews in New York state, 1960-1961. Acta Psychiatry Scandinavica, 49, 479-518. (largest U.S. Jewish population is found in New York State; compares incidence of mental disease among Jews and white non-Jews in NY State; based on 1st admissions to all mental hospitals in NY State during 1959-1961 (5,514 Jewish and 34,707 non-Jewish white first admissions); involutional depression and manic depressive illness made up more of the total proportion of cases among Jews than among non-Jews (12.1% and 5.8% vs 7.5% and 2.5%, respectively for native born) (18.6% and 3.9% vs 10.0% and 1.6%, respectively for foreign born); concluded that Jews had higher incidence of involutional psychoses and manic-depressive illness than non-Jews)
"Mandell, AJ (1980). Toward a psychobiology of transcendence: God in the brain. In Davidson, JM, & Davidson, R. J. (editors), The Psychobiology of Consciousness. New York: Plenum Press
*[Mandle (1984)........] (religious people commit suicide less often than non-religious)
"Manfredi, C., & Pickett, M. (1987). Perceived stressful situations and coping strategies utilized by the elderly. Journal of Community Health Nursing, 4, 99-110. (C/S survey of a convenience sample of 51 persons aged 60 or over in Rhode Island (senior citizen housing complex); the 66-item Ways of Coping Checklist, after identifying a stressful event he/she experienced in past month; prayer was the most frequently used strategy to cope in a field of 66 coping strategies)
"Mansfield, C., Mitchell, J., King, D. E. (1997). The doctor as God's mechanic? Beliefs of a southeastern role population. Presented at the Annual Meeting of the North American Primary Care Research Group, November 14, 1997, Orlando, Florida. (Reliance on religion and spirituality as a coping mechanism among the elderly is supported by this epidemiological survey--Mansfield and colleagues documented an increased reliance on prayer and religious faith among patients who perceived a decline in their health status)
"Manusov, E.G., Carr. R.J., Rowane, M., Beatty, L.A., & Nadeau, M.T. (1995). Dimensions of happiness: A qualitative study of family practice residents. Journal of the American Board of Family Practice, 8, 367-375. (Q) (religion or religious commitment was mentioned by many of the 59 residents (years 1-3) as a contributor to their happiness and well-being in four different sites (Cleveland, Washington DC, Charlotte, NC, Bethesda)
Maranell, G.M. (1974). Religiosity and personality adjustment. In Responses to Religion. Lawrence: The University Press of Kansas (109 students; examined 8 measures of different types of religiousness; two dimensions were consistently related to mental pathology (superstition and ritualism); measures of church orientation, altruism, fundamentalism, theism, idealism, and mysticism were unrelated; he concluded that religious persons are likely to be less well-adjusted than non-religious persons, although data do not support that conclusions, since if multiple comparisons are taken into consideration, there were no significant findings - reported in Bergin 1983, p 180)
"Marcus, P., & Rosenberg, A. (1995). The value of religion in sustaining the self in extreme situations. Psychoanalytic Review, 82, 81-105. (Kohut has noted that Freud "ignored the supportive aspects of religion. Religion consitutes a set of cultural values which he totally underestimated (Kohut, 1985, p 261)"; these authors examine the behavior of believing and practicing "traditional" Jewish inmates in Nazi concentration and death camps; self psychology is used to understand the religious experience in these extreme situations)
"Markides, K.S., Levin, J.S., & Ray, L.A. (1987). Religion, aging, and life satisfaction: an eight-year, three-wave longitudinal study. The Gerontologist, 27, 660-665. (8-year prospective cohort study of 511 Mexican-Americans and Anglos age 60 or over interviewed at 3 time points during this period (aim is to see if religious variables become stronger predictors of life satisfaction with aging); cross-sectional analyses using multiple regression conducted in 1976 (T1), 1980 (T2), and 1984 (T3); there were 230 respondents who participated in all three Waves; frequency of private prayer (single item), self-rated religiosity (single item), and church attendance (single item); regression results indicated the following std beta for CA on LS: 1976, beta=.03 (ns) for 230 and .09 for 511, p<.05; 1980, .13 (ns) for 230 and .15, p<.01 for 338; 1984, .06 (ns) for 230 and .08 (ns) for 254; for self-rated religiosity on LS: 1976, .05 (ns) for 230 and .10, p<.05 for 511; 1980, .03 (ns) for 230 and .08 (ns) for 338; 1984, .09 (ns) for 230 and .07 (ns) for 254; for private prayer: 1976, .04 (ns) for 230 and .07 (ns) for 511; 1980, .14, p<.05 for 230 and .13, p<.05) for 338; 1984, -.04 (ns) for 230 and -.04 (ns) for 254; among dropouts, means on life satisfaction, religious attendance, and functional health were all much lower than among participants; concluded that the associations (particularly with church attendance) lose their significance because dropouts (many who drop out due to death or serious illness) are less frequent attenders who report lower levels of functional health and life satisfaction)
"Martin, C., & Nichols, R.C. (1962). Personality and religious belief. Journal of Social Psychology, 56, 3-8. (C/S survey of convenience sample of 163 undergraduate college students (104 females); 41-item religious belief scale and 54-item religious information scales were developed by authors from existing instruments; also examined church attendance and membership, parental religious beliefs and atittudes; outcome was MMPI Pa scale (paranoia), L scale (lie), and MF scale (interest), and the California F scale (authoritarianism); correlations looked at for entire group and for 50 highest and 50 lowest on religious information (about Bible and other religious issues); religious belief scores inversely related to paranoia (-.12, p=ns), unrelated to Lie scale (.02, p=ns), positively related to MF (interest) scale (.16, p=ns) in males and unrelated in females (.00, p=ns), and significantly related to California F scale (.18, p<.05), and was unrelated to religious information measure, either Bible, other, or total; among those with high religious information, MF was inversely related (-.39, p<.05) and F scale was unrelated to religious belief; among low information, PA was inversely related to religious belief (-.31, p<.05) and F scale was significantly related (.31, p<.05) (no other variables controlled); also, they summarize a dozen studies in the 1950's that show a negative picture of the religious believer)
"Martin, D., & Wrightsman, L.S. (1965). The relationship between religious behavior and concern about death. Journal of Social Psychology, 65, 317-323. (C/S survey of convenience sample of 58 adult members of three churches in middle Tennessee (33 Church of Christ, 13 Methodist, 12 Christian Church; few subjects had attended college, age range 18-75, mean 44; given Religious Participation Scale (unpublished) asking degree of extent of church attendance, personal prayer, reading of religious material, Sunday school attendance, and ratings of the intensity of their religious convictions compared to others; Broen's Religious Attitude Inventory; Sarnoff & Corwin's Feath of Death Scale and a 10-item extension of that scale; religious participation was inversely related to both fear of death scales (-.27, p<.05, and -.42, p<.05); religious attitudes (Broen's Factor I "nearness of God" and Factor II "fundamentalism vs. humanism"), however, were unrelated to death concerns on either death anxiety scales) (no controls)
"Martin et al. Psychological Reports, 66, 123-128 (no religion)
Martin, W.T. (1984). Religiosity and United States suicide rates, 1972-1978. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 40, 1166-1169. (case-control study of suicide rates and church attendance; suicide rates per 100,000 obtained for white males, white females, black males, and black females for 1972-1978 from U.S. DHHS; religious involvement was based on GSS by NORC; church attendance measured on a 0-8 scale; correlated suicide rates in four subpopulations above with their mean church attendance rates based on GSS data; results indicated a negative correlation (r(14)=-.85, p<.0001); concluded that results of this study provide support for the idea that religiosity deters suicide)
("Despair is a sin, Sister", bishop to suicidal Sister Philomena in Brides of Christ!) ;-P
"Martin-Baro, I. (1990). Religion as an instrument of psychological warfare. Journal of Social Issues, 46, 93-107. (reviews a series of small studies in El Salvador in the 1980's (based on participant observation and all studies with 100 subjects) that show almost all Catholic base communities tend to assume active and critical postures toward the social order, while a significant portion of the evangelical and Catholic charismatics tend to adopt individualistic attitudes favoring passive submission to the social order (left in the "hands of God") (Jerry Falwell's moral majority and Pat Robertson's CBN don't appear to be doing this!)
"Martinez, F.I. (1991). Therapist-client convergence and similarity of religious values: Their effect on client improvement. Journal of Psychology and Christianity, 10, 137-143. (prospective cohort study of 30 subjects receiving counseling at a university counseling center in midwestern US; outcome measured by global improvement scale rated by patient and therapist (correlated .59); results indicated that if the client was more religious than the therapist, he/she was less likely to benefit from therapy than if patient were less religious than the therapist; patients also showed greater improvement if the therapist was more theologically conservative than the patient's orientation; furthermore, the therapist is more likely to rate the patient as having improved if their religious values become more like that of the therapist -- underscoring the effects that religious values have on therapy)
"Marty, M. E. (1982). Health/Medicine and the Faith Traditions: an Inquiry into Religion and Medicine. Philadelphia: Fortress Press
Marx, J.H., & Spray, S.L. (1969). Religious biographies and professional characteristics of psychotherapists. Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 10, 275-288. (C/S survey of 1,371 psychiatrists, 1,465 clinical psychologists, and 1,154 psychiatric social workers in Chicago, Los Angeles, and New York about religious affiliation (total 3790); found that 21.3% were Protestant, 9.5% Catholic, 33.6% Jewish, 14.6% none, 10.6% agnostic, and 10.4% atheists; Jews and unbelievers are markedly over-represented in the mental health professions; psychologists less religiously involved than most people, and therefore underestimate the signifiance of religion in people's lives)
"Masters, K.S., Bergin, A.E., Reynolds, E.M., & Sullivan, C.E. (1991). Religious life-styles and mental health: A follow-up study. Counseling & Values 35, 211-224. (don't have it) (3-year prospective study of 60 Mormon undergraduates; persons classified as manifesting a continuous religious development vs. discontinuous development; assessed with MMPI and Religious Orientation Inventory; over time, groups tended to regress toward the mean and become more similar over time; the "continuous group" appeared slightly more conforming, conventional, and self-controlled; both groups improved on mental functioning, as well as on intrinsic religiosity over time)
"Mathew, R.J. (1995). Measurement of materialism and spiritualism in substance abuse research. Journal of Studies on Alcohol, 56, 470-475. (Mathew Materialism-Spiritualism Scale developed in India, but now being tested in Durham, NC for use in U.S.; six subscales: I - (God) belief in God or a power that guides the universe, II - (Religion) examines faith in the value of religion and religious practices, III - (Mysticism) evaluates belief in the genuineness of mystic or transcendental experiences, IV - (Spirits) studies belief in the existence of spirits and survival of the soul after death, V - (Character) examines belief in the personal value to the individual of altruism, unselfishness, kindness, morality, etc., and VI - (Psi) relates to belief in the genuineness of paranormal phenomena such as extrasensory perception and telepathy; 62 members recovering from substance abuse (most in 12-step AA and NA programs) scored significantly higher on character and mysticism than 61 general controls (although controls younger than cases, and 12-step involved cases may have exaggerated their spiritual gains or those with greater spirituality may have chosen 12-step groups); MAST positive controls had significantly lower scores than recoverying group for God, mysticism, and character; Christians had higher scores on God and religion subscales than did nonChristians and agnostics)
"Mathew, R.J., Georgi, J., Wilson, W.H., & Mathew, V.G. (1996). A retrospective study of the concept of spirituality as understood by recovering individuals. Journal of Substance Abuse Treatment, 13, 67-73. (case-control C/S study of 62 persons (from AA, NA, and general public in Durham, NC) with history of drug/alcohol abuse abstinent for 6 months or more (52% male, mean age 43); compared with a control group (n=61) (54% male, mean age 33) of persons with no history of drug/alcohol or psychiatric problems; asked to complete Mathew Materialism Spiritualism Scale as (a) they would respond now and (b) as they would have responded during time when abusing drugs/alcohol; all six MMSS subscales showed increase from pre-abuse to post-abuse among cases; among controls, pre-recovery MMSS scores were higher than in cases; comparing post-recovery scores of controls and cases, only Mysticism subscale was higher among cases)
"Maton, K.I. (1989a). The stress-buffering role of spiritual support: cross-sectional and prospective investigations. Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, 28, 310-323. (C/S survey in Part I; prospective cohort study for Part II; 81 members of bereaved parents group (mean age 46, 77% women) divided into high and low stress groups (Part I); 68 high school seniors divided into high and low stress completed were surveyed twice, 5 months apart (Part II); in Part I, depression assessed with Hopkins Symptom Checklist and self-esteem with an adapted version of Rosenberg's scale; spiritual support assessed with 3-item scale asessing emotional, intimacy, and faith aspects of spiritual (religious) support; high life stress was defined by death of child within past 2 years (n=33) and low stress if death > 2 years (n=48); in Part II, college adjustment assessed with Personal-Emotional Adjustment scale and Social Adjustment scale during the first semester (Time 2); spiritual support assessed assessed at Time 1 (5 months earlier) with similar 3-item index used in Part I and church attendance was measured using a single item measure; social support was assessed with two standardized scales (diferent from Part I); pre-college depression was assessed as a baseline control with 7-item Brief Symptom Inventory; stress scale assessed 22 major life events and subjects divided into high and low life-stress samples based on scores above and below median on stress scale; in Part I, spiritual support inversely related to depression (-.23, p<.05) but not SE; effect was larger in high stress group (-.33, p<.05, for depression, and 0.42 with self-esteem, p<.01); for low-stress group, spiritual support unrelated to depression or self-esteem; in Part II, spiritual support was unrelated to emotional adjustment; for the high stress group, however, there was a relationship (p<.05); church attendance was unrelated; findings persisted after controlling for other variables -- demographics, social support, and other variables using regression)
[Maton, K.I. (1989b). Community settings as buffers of life stress? Highly supportive churches, mutual help groups, and senior centers. American Journal of Community Psychology, 17, 203-232.] (162 church members, mean age 31, surveyed on economic stress; membership in high or low support church, based on material support transactions in church; outcome life satisfaction; results ??)
"Maton, K.I., & Wells, E.A. (1995). Religion as a community resource for well-being: prevention, healing, and empowerment pathways. Journal of Social Issues, 51, 177-193.(excellent review)(churches 37% volunteer activity, $6.1 billion to community causes) This review examines the potential of religion as a community resource for well-being in primary prevention, healing, and group empowerment.
"Mattlin, J.A., Wethington, E., & Kessler, R.C. (1990). Situational determinants of coping and coping effectiveness. Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 31, 103-122. (C/S survey of 1,556 adults in Detroit multistage cluster sampling design) (including only non-black married couples (n=977) in which at least one spouse was 18-65 yo); were asked how they coped with the most stressful event or situation in their lives over the past year; 55% indicated that religion was used between "some" and "a lot" for dealing with stressor; religious coping more often used when dealing with illness and death, rather than when dealing with practical or interpersonal problems)
"Maugans, T.A., & Wadland, W.C. (1991). Religion and family medicine: A survey of physicians and patients. Journal of Family Practice, 32, 210-213. (C/S survey of 115 (of 146) members of Vermont Academy of Family Physicians, and 135 patients (of 150) from 3 outpatient FP practices in Vermont; among physicians, 33% Protestant, 22% Catholic, 8% Jewish, 28% none; among patients, 37% Protestant, 50% Catholic, 1% Jewish, and 9% none; patients more likely than physicians to believe in God (91% vs. 64%, p<.01), an afterlife (60% vs 45%, p=02), to use prayer (85% vs 60%, p<.01), and to feel close to God (74% vs. 43%, p<.01); physicians more likely to believe that the physician has the right (89% vs. 52%, p<.01) and responsibility (52% vs. 21%, p<.01) to inquire about religious factors; 77% of physicians at least occasionally address religious issues with patients; most common situation where physician addressed religious matters were: counseling for terminal illness (69%), impending death (68%), death (60%), birth (48%), major surgery (47%), and major illness (36%); 40% of patients believed that physicians should discuss pertinent religious issues; most patients did not recall physicians addressing religion)
"Maugans, T.A. (1996). The SPIRITual history. Archives of Family Medicine, 5, 11-16. (Q) (describes method of taking a medically-oriented Spiritual History, with case examples)
"Mayer, J., Merril, A., & Myerson, D.J. (1965). Contact and initial attendance at an alcoholism clinic. Quarterly Journal of Studies on Alcohol, 26, 480-485. (193 patients contacted the Peter Bent Brigham Hospital Alcoholism clinic and accepted intake appointments; 62% kept appointment and 38% did not; examined characteristics of persons who did not show up for their appointments; none of 11 characteristics of patients collected during the initial contact predicted who would show up for appointment (including religious affiliation) (Ca, Prot, Jew)
Mayo, C.C., Puryear, H.B., & Richek, H.G. (1969). MMPI correlates of religiousness in late adolescent college students. Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, 149, 381-385. (C/S survey of sample of convenience; MMPI administered to 166 college students at small denominational university in Texas; religious variables included whether person considered self "religious" or "non-religious" and and whether person was a church member; defined religious person as responding positively to both questions above; found that religious male students were different from non-religious male students by their absence of schizophrenic, depressive, and psychopathic deviate attributes; religious females had lower ego strength than non-religious females) (no control variables)
"McAllister, R.J., & Vanderveldt, A. (1961). Factors in mental illness among hospitalized clergy. Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, 132, 80-88. (examines the characteristics of clergy with mental illness (n=100) and compares them to non-clergy (n=100); worse outcomes observed (Seton Psychiatric Institute in Baltimore); duration of mental hospitalization was much longer for clergy compared with lay persons, p<.01; fewer clergy were improved at discharge (p<.01); clergy less likely to have a change of duty after discharge or be transfered to another hospital, rather than resume their occupation (p<.01); clergy more likely to have diagnoses of alcohol or anxiety disorder, compared with lay persons; and clergy more likely to have personality disorder compared with lay persons (p<.01) (note that clergy also more likely to have chronic illness, with onset of symptoms prior to age 32, p<.01, and more likely to have family members with psychiatric illness, p<.01); (no controls)
McAllister, R.J., & Vander Veldt, A.J. (1965). Psychiatric illness in hospitalized Catholic religious. American Journal of Psychiatry, 121, 881-884. (case-control study using an expanded sample from the study reported in 1961; consecutive discharges from a private psychiatric hospital: 200 Catholic religious psychiatric inpatients (100 priests and 100 nuns) compared with 200 lay patients (100 men and 100 women) and 200 non-ill Catholic religious (100 seminarians and 100 sisters without psychiatric illness); shotty, retrospective methodology; "proves" all the sterotypes affiliated with the religious; religious patients more likely to be hospitalized for misuse of alcohol or drugs or sexual "acting out"; alcoholism was predominant delinquency among clergy, acounting for 32 admissions; religious patients outnumbered lay patients 11 to 3 in admission for OCD symptoms; lay person more likely to have symptoms of depression than clergy (84 lay vs 34 clergy); 63% of religious vs 39% of lay patients were from lower SES level; 86% of clergy came from homes where parents exhibited definite psychiatric symptoms, 60% being alcoholism; 80 of lay patients vs 32 clergy were discharged within one month of hospitalization; 67 clergy vs 14 lay patients stayed over 6 months (explained this by fact that since their Superior was paying the bill, expense did not serve as motivation towards early discharge; religious patients outnumber lay patients 2:1 in personality disorders) (major defects in this study; may have been monetary motivations by hospital staff to keep these patients for long periods, given unlimited financial reimbursement; also, secular psychiatrists may have been more likely to make personality disorder diagnoses in these patients; finally, clergy clearly had more chronic symptoms (even though 50% of both clergy and lay patients had histories of prior psychiatric treatment) and came from more disrupted homes)
McAllister, R.J. (1969). The mental health of members of religious communities. International Psychiatric Clinics, 211-222. (R)
McBride, JL, Arthur, G., Brooks, R.,Pilkington, L. (1998). The relationship between eight patients spirituality and health experiences. Family Medicine, 30 (2),122-126. (Stratified, random sample of 422 patients from a suburban family practice residency clinic; used INSPIRIT to assess spirituality, Dartmouth Primary Care Cooperation Information Project (Coop) charts used to measure overall health and pain level; results indicated that overall better health was significantly related to greater spirituality (r=-.18, p<.001) (with spirituality measured as a continuous variable); less physical pain also tended to be related to greater spirituality (r=-.09, p=.08) (uncontrolled). When spirituality broken down to high, moderate, and low, moderate spirituality was associated with significantly lower pain that low spirituality (p=.008), although high spirituality was associated with nonsignificantly greater pain (curvilinear relationship).
McClure, R.F., & Loden, M. (1982). Religious activity, denomination membership and life satisfaction. Psychological Quarterly Journal of Human Behavior, 19, 12-17.] (C/S survey in mid-sized Southwestern city; convenience sample of 233 adults were solicited from participants involved in church activities (33 Catholic, 13 Jewish, 73 Baptist, 42 Mormon samples) and a control sample of 66 college students and 6 atheists (Texas); depression scale on MMPI was measure of life-satisfaction/happiness; the more time spent on religious activities, the higher the life-satisfaction/happiness (p<.001); the more religious responsibilities a person had, the greater their life satsifaction and happiness with religious associations (p<.0001) (associations uncontrolled)
McCrae, R.R., & Cost, P.T. (1986). Personality, coping and coping effectiveness in an adult sample. Journal of Personality, 54, 385-405 (CS survey of samples of 255 participants in BLSA who had reported recent negative life event, and 151 not reporting recent negative event; reported that "faith" was rated as the single most effective coping strategy (out of 27 strategies) in dealing with loss events in both samples; however, "faith"postively related to neuroticism in Study 2 (non-stressed) (r=.17, p<.05) and inversely related to openness to experience in both studies (r=-.19, p<.01) and r=-.30, p<.001); no controls.
McCullagh, E.P., & Lewis, L.A. (1960). A study of diet, blood lipis and vascular disease in trappist monks. New England Journal of Medicine, 263, 569-573. (while monks had lower serum cholesterols due to avoidance of animal fat, they were not protected from either atherosclerotic vascular disease or hypertension; in fact, the data suggested that arterial hypertension was more frequent in them than in other men of the same age in the American population; concluded that diets low in animal fat and low serum cholesterol levels are not by themselves sufficient to offset the advance of CAD and HTN)
McDowell, D., Galanter, M., Goldfarb, L., & Lifshutz, H. (1996). Spirituality and the treatment of the dually diagnosed: an investigation of patient and staff attitudes. Journal of Addictive Diseases, 15(2), 55-68. (C/S survey of 101 consecutive admissions to chemical dependency unit of hospital (mean age 37, 77% men, 46% Black and 29% Hispanic, 42% Catholic and 42% Protestant, 23% homeless; 31 nurses also surveyed (74% women, mean age 35, 32% Asian, 52% Catholic and 19% Hindu); God and Life Scale (Feigan 1964) used to assess spiritual interests (11-items tapping extrinic and intrinsic religiosity/spirituality) and 3 Gallup items (comfort from religion, attendance, and belief in God); patients asked to assess the value of 11 factors in recovery from addiction: AA, outpt prorams, medical services, comunity, spirituality, inner peace, beleif in God, trusting, a job, housing, benefits (rank-ordered in importance); nurses given similar questionnaire but asked to guess patients' responses; nurses not significantly different on religious belief or activity; however, were very different in rating value of factors in recovery: patient's rated belief in God, AA meetings, and strong sense of spirituality significantly higher than nurses predicted they would (all p<.05); nurses also underestimated that patients' interest in having more spiritual groups, p<.05))
McKinney, J.P., McKinney, K. G. (1999). Prayer in the lives of late adolescents. Journal of Adolescence, 22, 279-290. (This cross-sectional study found a relationship between identity status and frequency of praying among college students. There was also association found between identity status and commitment to religion. Qualitative analysis indicated that prayer may be a revealing approach to the psychosocial lives of late adolescents including their central concerns, temporal orientation, and the social bounds of their definition of self.)
McMordie, W.R. (1981). Religiosity and fear of death: Strength of belief system. Psychological Reports, 49, 921-922. (C/S survey of convenience sample of 120 male, 200 female undergraduate psychology students completed self-perceived religiosity checklist, followed by Templer-McMordie Death Anxiety scale; medium religiosity subjects had significantly higher death anxiety (p<.05) than the high or low religiosity groups, suggesting a curvilinear relationship)
McNamara, P.H., & St. George, A. (1979). Measures of religiosity and the quality of life. In Moberg, D.O. (ed), Spiritual Well-Being: Sociological Perspectives. Washington, DC: University Press of America, 229-236 (don't have it) (C/S survey of national random sample conducted by U of Mich SRC of 2,164 persons age 18 or older in U.S. (Quality of American Life Survey); 8-items measured religious commitment: importance of religious faith, satisfaction with religion, denominational preference, attendance, religious-mindedness, attednance at religious instruction as child, church membership, and membership in church-connected group; standard scales of life satisfaction, marital satisfaction, family life satisfaction, personal competence, general affect, and well-being; not surprising, satisfaction with religion related to most other life satisfaction outcomes; church membership was significantly related to personal competence; no other associations reported) (poor study!)
Meador, K.G., Koenig, H.G., Turnbull, J., Blazer, D.G., George, L.K., & Hughes, D. (1992). Religious affiliation and major depression. Hospital and Community Psychiatry, 43, 1204-1208. (C/S survey of probability sample involving 2,850 adults participating in NIMH ECA study, Duke University site; greater rate of major depression in Pentecostals vs. other affiliations (5.4% vs. 1.7%); even after controlling for covariates, rate of major depression in Pentecostals was three times greater than for other affiliations)
Meisenhelder, J.B. (1986). Self-esteem in women: The influence of employment and perception of husbands' appraisals. Image: Journal of Nursing Scholarship, 18, 8-14. (C/S survey of stratified random sample of 163 women (85% response) ages 25-45 living at home with husbands and children in suburban Boston (mean age 35, 2.2 children, 40% Jewish, 34% Catholic, 17% Catholic); strength of religious beliefs and religious affiliation; self-esteem by 10-item Rosenberg scale; for homemakers (n=68), self-esteem correlated with two variables, one of which was religious strength, which also had the strongest correlation with self-esteem (beta .38, p<.01); for employed women, religious strength unrelated (r=.12) to self-esteem, which was predicted by quality of relationship with husband, older age, and part/full time employment; these are results from a regression model controlling for seven other predictors of self-esteem)
Mickley, J.R., Carson, V., & Soeken, K.L. (1995). Religion and adult mental health: state of the science in nursing. Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 16, 345-360. (reviews the major empirical data on religion and mental health pertinent to nursing)
Middleton, W.C., & Putney, S. (1962). Religious, normative standards and behavior. Sociometry, 25, 141-152. 554 college students from Florida and California (predominantly White and Protestant) answered anonymous questionnaires (260 M, 294 F). Religiosity was measured as belief in God vs. atheistic, agnostic or deistic beliefs. The authors find no evidence that religious sanctions are essential to sustain basic social norms. Although religious individuals are more likely to believe in traditional ascetic morality than skeptics (sign test, p<.05), there was no significant difference in beliefs in social morality. Believers are less likely to engage in anti-ascetic behaviors than skeptics (sign test, p<.05). When compared with two other measures of religiosity (church attendance and importance of religious convictions to the individual), the first measure was highly correlated. Thus, the results regarding normative standards are not a function of the measure of religiosity.
Mitchell, J., Mathews, H.F., & Yesavage, J.A. (1993). A multidimensional examination of depression among the elderly. Research on Aging, 15, 198-219. C/S survey of a random sample of 868 persons aged 65-101 in eastern North Carolina to examine the impact of variables that moderate the impact of life strain on depression (ave age 75, 65% women, 90% fairly or deeply religious); life strain measured by hearing impairment, ADL limitations (13 items), and poverty status; moderator variables included social contact, social support, and belief in religious intervention in illness ("Have you been cured of an illness through prayer? Do you believe in religious miracles? How strongly do you believe that prayer will heal illness?" (score range 9 to 27); depression measured by 15-item GDS (with 3 dimensions: life satisfaction, withdrawal, and general depressive affect); regression analysis revealed that Religious Intervention was inversely related to the withdrawal subscale (-.09, p<.05), but was positively related to general depressive affect (.07, p<.05), and there was a significant interaction between ADL impairment and religious intervention (p<.05), such that general depressed affect tends to be higher among those with ADL limitations who also believe in religious intervention in illness; indepth interviews with 200 respondents revealed that there was a tendency for people with ADL limitations to believe in religious intervention to cure them; when cures do not occur, however, they blame themselves) (negative study)
Mitchell, R.E., Cronkite, R.C., & Moos, R.H. (1983). Stress, coping, and depression among married couples. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 92, 433-448. (C/S survey of a convenience sample of community couples (n=157) and couples in which one person was depressed (n=157) from Stanford University Hospital and VA Hospital in Palo Alto, CA; cases and controls were matched; men were significantly older and had more years of education than women, otherwise groups were quite comparable; completed Health and Daily Living Form, Family Environment Scale, and Work Environment Scale; variables included measures of social background, negative life events, chronic strain coping responses (problem solving and emotional discharge), family supports (cohesion, expressiveness, and conflict), and depression (18 symptoms on 0-4 scale); depressed patients were more stressed and possessed fewer personal and social resources; spouses of cases fell between depresed partneres and control subjects on above factors; negative life events, coping, and family suppport were directly related to depression; refers to studies that show that social support buffers the effects of negative life events (Gottlieb 1981; Heller & Swindle 1983; House 1981; Mtichell & Trickett 1980; Mitchell et al 1982); no mention of religion)
Mittal, D., Sears, SF, Godding, PR, & Reynolds, M.D. (1999). Case report: decision-making capacity and religious conversion--a case of dialysis refusal. Annals of Long-term Care, 7,320-322. (Describe the case of a hemodialysis patient age 55 presenting with recent religious conversion, and subsequent noncompliance with hemodialysis. Working within the patient belief system and maintaining a therapeutic alliance were critical in achieving resolution of this situation)
Mollica, R.F., Streets, F.J., Boscarino, J., & Redlich, F.C. (1986). A community study of formal pastoral counseling activities of the clergy. American Journal of Psychiatry, 143, 323-328. (list of all known clergy in south-central Connecticut was obtained from the Metropolitan New haven Directory of Churches and Synagoges; the 214 or 290 clergy who responded to the C/S survey were divided into (1) traditional clergy (Methodist, Episcopalian, Unitarian, Catholic priests, and Rabbis) (n=116), (2) evangelical clergy (Pentecostal ministers excluded) (n=13), (3) Black clergy (n=21), and (4) pastoral counselors (n=64); two-thirds of traditional clergy spent 10% or less of their time providing pastoral counseling, whereas the majority of Black and evangelical clergy spent 11%-25% of their time counseling; most clergy had not received formal training in counseling; Black ministers were more likely to counsel poor individuals, to counsel persons with drug or alcohol problems, and to be involved in crisis intervention; traditional or evangelical clergy were more likely to be sought out for help or have someone referred to them, whereas Black clergy were more likely to seek out emotionally troubled persons; only pastoral counselors charged fees ($25 or less), and only 22% charged anything; pastoral counselors made the most referrals to psychiatric professionals and evangelical clergy made the fewest; evangelical clergy primarily referred to other clergy; more than three quarters of traditional, evangelical, and pastoral counselors and more than half of Black clergy had never received a referral from the regional mental health center) (emphasizes lack of communication between clergly and mental health professionals)
Moore, T.V. (1936). Insanity in priests and religious. American Ecclesiastical Review, 95, 485-498, 601-613. (case-control study of all Catholic mental hospitals in United States, and state institutions, city hospitals, county santoria, and private institutions (77%-100% response); of the total number of priests in U.S. in 1935 (30,250) there were 135 admitted to mental hospitals, giving a rate of 446/100,000; of the total number of nuns/sisters in U.S. in 1935 (122,220), 593 were admitted, giving a rate of 485/100,000; of total number of brothers in the United States in 1935 (7,408), there were 31 admitted to mental hospitals, giving a rate of 418/100,000; for comparison, in the U.S. Navy, there were 390 admitted, giving a rate of 357/100,000; in the U.S. Army, there were 740/100,000; this should also be compared with total mental cases per 100,000 in New York (600) in 1934 and in Massachusetts in 1934 (591); the difference is significant at p<.001, suggesting lower rates of mental illness among the Catholic religious; however, they also did find a rate of 4,118/100,000 among cloistered, exclusively contemplative nuns; this is particularly true for schizophrenia in cloistered nuns, where rate was 5 times greater than expected) (suggesting that there was a tendecy of pre-psychotic schizophrenics to seek admission to the religious life); on the other hand, remarks that syphilitic mental conditions are almost unheard of among priests and nuns (sufficiently well-known for Kraeplin to make the comment "Quakers and Catholics are very seldom paretic. Krafft-Ebing saw not a single Catholic priest in 2,000 cases of parensis, but on the other hand, found that as many as 90% of officers in the army with mental disease were paretics... Up to the present paretic nuns seem never to have been observed." (p 487, E. Kraepelin. Psychiatrie II)
Morris, P.A. (1982). The effect of pilgrimage on anxiety, depression and religious attitude. Psychological Medicine, 12, 291-294. (prospective cohort study of 24 persons with serious illness (92% Catholic), average age 60, made pilgrimage to Lourdes; assessed within month preceding pilgrimage (Time 1), 1 month (Time 2) and 10 months (Time 3) after return with Beck Depression Inventory and Spielberger State-Trait Anxiety Inventory; found a significant lessening of both state and trait anxiety from Time 1 to Time 2 (p<.01), Time 1 to Time 3 (p<.01), and significant decrease in state anxiety from Time 2 to Time 3 (p<.05); also significant decrease in depression from Time 1 to Time 2 and Time 1 to Time 3, but not between Time 2 to Time 3; relationships were similarly significant when stratified by sex; no other variables controlled; also compared mean religiosity scores on Religious Attitudes Scale (Poppleton & Pilkington) before and after trip; they were not significantly different)
Musick, M.A. (1996). Religion and subjective health among black and white elders. Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 37, 221-237. (3-year prospective cohort study of stratified random sample of persons age 65 or over in North Carolina (EPESE); Wave I participants numbered 4,162 and Wave II numbered 2,623; used regression analysis to examine predictors of subjective health in Black and White subsamples; for 1,421 Blacks, Wave I religious devotion (private prayer/Bible reading) was significantly related to greater Wave II subjective health (beta=.07, p<.01, using residualized change analysis), but religious attendance was not after functional impairment was controlled (because Blacks with higher levels of functional impairment spend more time in devotional activities, the effect of devotion on subjective health ccannot be seen until functional impairment is controlled); among 1,202 Whites, while there was no main effect for either Wave I devotion or attendance, there was a significant interaction between both and functional impairment (beta=.06, p<.05 and beta=.09, p<.001) (high levels of functional impairment and high devotional activity or high religious attendance at Wave I are related to better perceptions of physical health (Wave II), providing evidence for the comfort role of religion) (comment: greater religious involvement among southern Blacks (especially church attendance) combined with a limited range of religious activity response categories, results in a limited dispersion of the religious variable (and less power to predict health outcomes); furthermore, church attendance is ubiquitous among southern Blacks, making decisions about how often to attend heavily influenced by social expectation and community ethos, rather than religiosity (also see Ellison 1995 and Ellison & Levin 1998))
Musick, M., Williams, D. R., and Jackson, J. S. (1998a). Race-related stress, religion and mental health among African American adults. Paper presented at the 7th International Conference on Social Stress Research, Budapest, Hungary. (C/S probability sample of 586 black community-dwelling adults in the Detroit Area Study; psychological distress was measured by a 7-item Kessler index, and was measured using the Diagnostic Interview Schedule (short composite); religious variables were religious attendance and prayer; stress was operationalized in terms of discrimination (2 measures); results indicated that among men, attendance was inversely associated with negative well-being and major depression, whereas among women, attendance was associated with less psychological stress (controlled); among men, the effects of stress on mental outcomes were moderated by religious attendance; there were mixed findings for prayer; they found that men who used prayer to cope were undergoing more stress than men not using prayer to cope)
Musick, M.A., and Strulowitz, S. (1998b). Public religious activity and depressive symptomatology: a comparison of religious groups in the United States. Social Science and Medicine, under review (7-year prospective cohort study of 13, 017 community-dwelling adults in United States (10,008 in Wave II); 8 religious groups were formed: Jews, conservative Protestant, moderate Protestant, liberal Protestant, black Protestant, Catholics, Mormons, and others cycle depressive symptoms measured by 12-item CES-D (somatic retarded and depressed affect subscales); religion variables were 2 public religious index, participation in church affiliated groups, and belief in the truth of the Bible; social integration, marital status, health status and demographic variables were controls; religious attendance (wave 1) was positively related to somatic retarded activity (wave 2) in Jews (p<.01), but inversely related in conservative Protestants (p<.05), Catholics (p<.05), and Mormons (p<.05); a similar pattern of results was found for depressed affect (wave 2), with religious attendance been positively correlated with depressed affect in Jews (p<.05), and inversely related in conservative Protestants (p<.001) and Mormons (p<.05) (multiple controls)

Anyone with any more, hard, related, empirical data, feel free to leave your link in the comments box!

Truly wyrd Sims shit!

2007-02-13T06:46:00.000+10:00
Something truly wyrd happened in the Sims today: Abbe Odhran (father confessor and chaperone of Claire Charming) and Claire both sleep, Odhran after giving up his aspirations to stardom in Studio Town, Claire exhausted from trying to make it there... And their piano plays by itself!!!

(They also have no radio or jukebox, always previously having made their own music... o O... a Sims ghost pianist walks, and plays???) lol

a poem dialogue by Colin and Claire

2007-02-07T09:53:00.000+10:00
which colours?

a flower
or several
is often
delightful
in mauve spaces

(Colin)

a plan
governed
dreams in winter

be careful with
a dwarf tulip species
these flowers
smaller
in sheer autumn comfort

(Claire)

Bringing up Elden (a new moon Sims-novella)

2007-01-20T05:48:00.000+10:00
Picture 1:

At Number 76, Sim Lane, funnily, not too far from the palatial mansion of the filthy rich Goths Senior, founders of the neighbourhood, lives a very "modest" family, to say the least.
"Modest" seems hardly the word. Semi-rural, semi-feral, semi-degenerate Hicks, straight from Red Neck County, Hicksville, if you must know. The Goths shun this part of the neighbourhood, uncomfortably in cheek-by-jowl proximity, even when they take their evening perambulations and constitutionals down by the picturesque Gothic quarter of the Old Town, otherwise celebrated for its cool haunts full of pool halls and New-Orleans-type jazz groups. The magnolia grows very lush indeed around this part of town, and the cemeteries only serve to give it local character, and an atmosphere or ambience all its own.
Picture, if you will, Mama Hick, in a faded print housecoat and down-at-heel slippers, her son Elden in greasy overalls, his greasy black hair tied back in a lank ponytail in an attempt to look "cool". Mama cannot but think of him as an unemployed layabout, and seeming ne'er-do-well wastrel, while she at least has her extremely low-paid job as dishwasher, so that at least she can call herself with some pride one of the working poor. Still, she feels proud of him, as her only son, and wonders when her seed will emerge in him, instead of his layabout "bad seed" father's, which has flourished throughout his youth.
Still, the feeling between her and Cornelia Goth Senior (pictured above), despite her efforts at neighbourly hospitality, seems totally mutual; she in her turn thinks of Cornelia as a snooty, stuck-up old bitch. The flies buzz around the screen door, temporarily disturbed from their torpor, as Cornelia slams her way out, pursing her prim lips to an even more severe and disapproving line.
Picture, if you will, the backyard of their cramped clapboard bungalow, littered with a rusting old stove Elden discarded as unworkable one day, overrun by three semi-feral dogs (Bobo, Duke and Leroy, what else? named after the local constabulary), and a couple of cheap, kitschy, fluorescent pink plaster flamingoes in a vain attempt to glam the place up. The dogs run gleeful riot, only getting wilder and wilder, and less domesticated by the day, turning the place into the sort of dump into which you would not invite Cornelia Goth, even if you wanted to. The paperboys and -girls on their routes run shrieking in fear even before they see them, as Duke at least, a German Shepherd puppy, and Leroy, the rottie cross, look a lot fiercer than they seem, when you get to know them; only the scruffy mongrel Bobo does not look at all intimidating.
Elden has become a pinball wizard, by the way, with nothing better to do in his infinity of spare moments, than clock up hi-scores; unbeknownst to many, even to Mama, he also harbours a fondness for classical music, and despises the hillbilly rock and bluegrass, which seem all the local radio stations want you to hear...

Picture 2:

Then one day, Mama hears the words of Dr Phil, "This could be a changin' day in your life", ringing through her consciousness like a mantra, or clarion call.
She decides to look for, and get, another job, and goes out to bring in the paper the shrieking paperboy or -girl has left, when he or she ran off, shrieking in fear, from the dogs.

Picture 3:

And miracles sometimes do happen!
She does get another job, as test-subject, i.e. human guinea-pig, in the local research foundation. Their pay at least beats washing dishes, and she has her foot at least on the bottom rung of the ladder of science.
She changes out of her faded old housecoat, into a bright, checked, western-style shirt knotted under her still shapely breasts, and hip-hugging jeans, applies some pink lippy and runs her fingers through her coarse, bottle-blonde hair. Not quite Cher, Madonna, Michelle Pfeiffer or Susan Sarandon, but there still linger some faded traces of the former beauty pageant queen...
She has the kitchen completely made over, re-installing the old but still usable cooker, gleaming, to its rightful place, buying another chair to make a cosy dining setting for two (where had that other matching chair disappeared to, exactly?), and ripping out the mismatched wallpaper and clapboard interior, and replacing it with neat cream brick veneer (surprisingly affordable, clean and smart!), which sets off the rather beautiful tiles running through the kitchen and hallway, now clean of dog litter. She feels like a little girl again, playing with her first dolls' house, and tea-set! She also hires a maid service, to take care of the place while she goes out to work: a rather simple, but pleasant-faced Irish girl named Brigit becomes their daily char, almost as much a fixture, as the furniture, in fact. She buys a dog-kennel (she can still only afford one), and a couple of sheepskin-lined pet beds, and replaces Elden's pinball machine, that monstrous waste of space, time and money, with a beautiful marble outdoor chess set, complete with timer, and two patio deck chairs, for which she scrimped and saved out of her pin-money.
She sits down to play, and sharpen her wits and logic skills, to enter the magic world of science from the ground up... and a new world opens before her. She never had got around to getting much schoolin', but if those fancy grad. psych. students want to study her as a human guinea-pig, she intends to make it worth their while, and maybe she can also pick up something along the way, by osmosis, you might say. Her old man had always said she had a pretty sharp brain; pity it had got buried under all those X-chromosomes. Oh, well, maybe the old brain hadn't quite rusted up, like Elden's battered old turquoise rustbucket of a Chevvy, yet.

Picture 4:

She notices, out of the corner of her eye, Elden hurrying past her down the hallway to strip himself out of those greasy old overalls, and change into some duds more suited to a fledgling support technician: a freshly-pressed, short-sleeved, white shirt, a tie (even with a tiepin, which his old man must have left behind when he cleared out!) and some neat dark grey pants with a crease with which you could slice bread. Hmm, he has not wasted all those hours spent in evening classes after all, she muses. He scrubs up OK, she thinks.
My boy.

Picture 5:

Mama can hardly believe her new kitchen, with the shiny steel surface of its new trash compactor (no more unsightly and malodorous messes, attracting squadrons of flies!), just right for chopping up ingredients on her chopping board, by way of preparation for dinner.
She feels like a brand-new woman, let alone a brand-new mama.
The dogs still love her, unreservedly and unconditionally (they can still smell the old Mama under all the shiny newness), but Elden sometimes looks at her with a faraway look of suspicion in his eyes, not quite trusting who or what she has become.

Picture 6:

The crickets squeak.
Gosh, suddenly it seems awfully lonely and quiet tonight, as she sits down to her own lovely home-cooking, without Elden now for the first time in lawks knows how many years, now that he works his butt off as a support techie, looking every inch the geek.
He has even started keeping pens in his breast pocket, though, luckily, none of them has leaked yet.
The little nest feels awfully empty, if clean and quiet at last.
Newly promoted to cleaning out rat cages as lab assistant, on graveyard shift, she herself has now changed to clinically white scrubs. The whiteness of sterility becomes her, with approaching menopause.

Picture 7:

Still frowsy in pyjamas, and groggy from his graveyard shift, with daylight yawning blearily outside the windows, Elden feels understandably nervous about using what he had written off as a crappy old cooker, knowing it to represent a death-trap just waiting to happen to him personally, as he knows from previous unfortunate incendiary experiences.
It seems to have his name inscribed personally all over its malevolent hotplates.

Picture 8:

Like a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom, the cooker finally erupts in flames.
"Oh, no, not again!" - the last lucid thought he can remember thinking, not unlike the mysterious bowl of petunias manifested by the Infinite Improbability Drive in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, before its own sudden demise.

Picture 9:

Luckily, he had had the forethought to install a smoke alarm.
While extinguishing the flames, the fireman dryly remarks, "We strongly recommend you get a new cooker, mate." (Sub-text: "We have gotten bloody sick and tired of traipsing out here to the bloody boondocks all the time.")

Picture 10:

Elden looks and feels a whole lot better, reeking of after shave, slipping out of the geeky white shirt now stained under the armpits, and into a short-sleeved safari jacket more suited to his next leg-up the corporate IT ladder, to "webmaster".
Funny, he still does not feel like Spiderman yet, and, besides, he lacks the silly spandex comicbook-superhero tights.

Picture 11:

Competent at work, totally incompetent at home, Elden feels he now leads a double life.
Maybe because he had always felt the kitchen belonged properly to Mama, he always felt bumbling, incompetent and out of place there. Because, at least in that sphere, her effortless superiority constantly put him to shame.
When the fireman came to pay another, by now almost routine visit, he could only mutter, dazedly, confusedly, and mostly embarrassedly, "But I did get a new cooker, like you guys said!" And 'cooking with gas' did not present the easy, proverbial option...

Picture 12:

Dawning flash of illumination on Mama's part, as she wisely leaves out a plate of home-made grits and chitlins for Elden, knowing that the "fire hazard" arises not so much from the succession of cookers, as Elden's own lack of culinary expertise.

Picture 13:

Dawning flash of illumination on Elden's part, as he scarfs down Mama's home-made treat, not unlike the dogs wolfing down their chow, since he now knows that somehow, as part of his on-the-job life-training, you might call it, he must learn to cook... some time!

Picture 14:

Only, when can he possibly find the time, when he hardly has time to take a quick slash?

Picture 15:

Still unwilling to trust himself to the still malevolently lurking cooker, Elden thinks he has solved the hunger problem on a short-term basis by dialling out for pizza. At 40 Simolions a pop, it seems cheap at the price!

Picture 16:

He sits down patiently with a good book to await the arrival of the pizza dude.
And waits.
And waits.
o O, maybe the pizza dude got lost.
Maybe the pizza dude could not find his way out here to the boondocks.
In any case, no tip for the pizza dude. The pizza would have become well and truly stone-cold by now, and it looks like the hunger problem still comes down to Mama, anyway.
The crickets squeak, as Elden waits with patient resignation, and growing, gnawing impatience, for Mama to come feed him.

Picture 17:

After a good feed, Elden finally sits down to bone up on some much-needed cooking skills, and, feeling like a master chef short only of the tall, funny-looking, white hat, he eyes the cooker for the first time with something like confidence, delicacy, gentleness and respect.

Picture 18:

Elden thinks, "Mama forgot my birthday, or maybe we just couldn't afford one before, what with all the home improvements, but dammit all! I think I will belatedly surprise myself with a party now, hehe!"

Picture 19:

The yuppie Tiffany Burb approaches, bearing a floral arrangement Elden doesn't quite know what to do with, and the usual "rent-a-crowd" of familiar and unfamiliar faces starts filing in, including that dreadful Marcel-Marceau lookalike who has to crash every party, under the delusion of providing people with entertainment!

Picture 20:

Horror of horrors, everyone at the big boy's birthday party gets a piece of the cake, and some even a piece of the action, but Elden himself, still battling his way through the wall-to-wall "rent-a-crowd" lining the hallway, and clogging the kitchen; maybe Mama actually cut the cake, having got there before him, and she just home from work, in her white labcoat, wearing a silly party hat like everyone else, but him... It could almost pass for a bizarre fancy-dress costume of the nutty professor, or mad scientist archetype, or stereotype!
Stuff it all, Elden, in his party gear, but minus silly party hat, stumps off to bed, abandoning his own party, feeling much like the tragic Eeyore on his birthday, in the saddest, boggiest slough of despond in the Hundred-Acre Wood...

Picture 21:

Anyone would think it Mama's birthday, not Elden's, the way she carries on!

Picture 22:

Elden leaves the still-continuing party in the early hours of the morning to go to work as competent "webmaster" as usual, thinking, "This must amount to about the suckiest birthday ever, and I don't even have a hangover to show for it!"

Picture 23:

In the pitch darkness, Elden returns home, thinking, "Let the good times roll... and I will probably miss them, as usual... That's what comes of postponing a Sagittarian birthday to a dour Capricorn new moon?" Talk about anti-climactic!

Picture 24:

Surveying the litter of debris from burst party balloons and crumpled silly hats, not to mention a flood of water from the leaking new dishwasher, Elden would still like to test his fledgling cooking skills on at least some sort of normal, home-cooked breakfast, wondering, "Are we having fun yet?"

Picture 25:

Mama still has no faith in Elden's new skills, and cooks up her own batch of chitlins and grits,
making Elden feel subtly undermined by her superior, silent efficiency. Suicidal ideation steals up on him like great red bars of internalised anger streaking his inner eye... Now, if his old man had just left his old shotgun lying around, I might just pull the trigger, one bullet for Mama, and one for myself, he muses. And if only those damned dogs would stop getting underfoot whenever I want in and out of the bathrooms, which barely have room for one human, let alone assorted dependent livestock; maybe a bullet through each of their brains would constitute an acceptably humane form of euthanasia?

Picture 26:

"Hey, I did it!" Elden congratulates himself, leaving the heavy, steaming pot off the cooker. "Pity Mama isn't here to see it! I know she thinks me a useless bumbling bum, still..."

Picture 27:

There still remains the problem of the undisposed-of, and non-bio-degradable, litter of party balloons, however. (Leave that to Brigit, and the omniscient narrator!)

Picture 28:

Elden privately congratulates himself on successfully navigating the pitfalls of dinner as well: another culinary milestone passed!

Picture 29:

Mama returns home to see a relatively clean and unscathed kitchen, and thinks, "About bloody time my bloody son does make it bloody good, even for a bloody HACKER!!!"

Picture 30:

But still, Elden feels gnawed and tormented by inner anxiety. Can't you just see the stubble growing back on his chin with worry, even on his day off, and despite the smart new green velvet suit, with open-necked yellow shirt, he now affects, as a hacker? In fact, you can already smell the sweat staining the armpits of said green velvet suit, although Claire Charming, the paramedic who lives just down the road with her cute, if boisterous, cocker spaniel pup Luna, once mistook that sweaty armpit smell for manly pheromones, when she had a passing crush on him... He wonders if he will ever score a chick, other than Mama, of course.

Picture 31:

Elden remembers his long-buried fondness classical music, and invests in a groovy-looking, retro-jukebox to play all his vintage vinyl records again. How did he manage to survive at all, without Mozart filling the air-waves?

Picture 32:

Mama challenges him to a quiet game of chess, confident of her own logic skills as a graduate field researcher, and also the charismatic presentation skills she has picked up from endless hours practising in front of the gleaming retro-mirror she has hung on the clean, brick-veneered kitchen wall.
"Sit down, Sonny Jim, and take some lessons from your old maw!"
Elden feels the sweat and adrenalin begin to prickle through his green velvet suit, despite her quietly confident, and not at all arrogant, demeanour.

Picture 33:

Mind you, the cool Aquarian graduate scientist and fledgling Sagittarian IT hacker seem to grow in mutual respect, during the course of this crucial, if primitive, war-strategy game, as they pit their wits against each other, so I can't find it all bad, can you?

Picture 34:

Against the odds, or maybe with the Infinite Improbability Drive working for him for once, Elden checkmates Mama, although her ego does not seem sufficiently insecure to crumble, having built up a secure armoury of self-love ("the greatest love of all", to coin a cliche?) in front of that magic, gleaming mirror of self-love, perhaps the most magical of all her kitchen appliances, which may one day take her out of field research, and into the classroom, or lecture theatre...
As it says in the Zen scriptures, "The mind is clear and calm like a mirror"... or something like that.

Picture 35:

Elden, on the other hand, feels all excited, and disproportionately elated, by this temporary victory, or maybe the classical music really has fired up his neurons?

Picture 36:

Somehow, I, as omniscient narrator, and godlike puppeteer pulling the strings, now expanding, now contracting time, with more or less godlike efficiency, and Mama, as she sinks into her new reproduction-antique single bed (to replace the space-wasting old double bed), and the boundaries dissolve between omniscient narrator, Mama and Elden in this intervening hypnagogic moment of Zen satori and transcendental calm, feel sorry for Elden, because he can never quite achieve the level Mama does, with ease and gracefulness... and god/dess, or the Bose-Einstein condensate, only knows, he does try, rushing at everything like a mad bull at a gate; he just tries too hard! Has he in fact inherited some "bad seed" from Papa, counteracting Mama's good genes? In any case, I, as omniscient narrator, vow to learn from Mama's example, as role model, Zen guru and spirit guide, unlikely as that might have seemed at the outset of this journey, and, funnily enough, so does Elden, in his incoherent, inchoate, bumbling way!
Even in her temporary setback of checkmate, Mama feels strangely victorious and undefeated.
The "inner smile" blooms spontaneously on both our faces...

Picture 37 (below):

We can all learn a lot from Mama's almost dreamily "nonchalant", yet focussed, Zen-like grace, and Aquarian "sang froid" (both French words undoubtedly picked up in the French-Creole-speaking old Gothic quarter of our deep southern Old Town!).
Both French words just mean "cool", in English, really.
Elden begins to practise in this "school of cool", challenging as that might seem for a hot-blooded, sweaty, impetuous Sagittarian, even performing such mundane tasks as scolding the dogs for piddling on the tiled floor, thereby improving their house-breaking skills, with no malice or anger at all, and even some of the aplomb, "sang froid" Mama shares with this Saturnian Capricorn new moon, straddling the tensions and dynamics between Sagittarius and Aquarius, to build something new?
"Awareness is a mirror,
reflecting the four elements;
beauty is a heart that generates love,
and a mind that is open."
(Thich Nhat Hanh, Vietnamese Buddhist monk.)
Mama's house now looks clean enough for health, and just dirty enough for happiness!

2007-01-20T05:46:00.000+10:00

2007-01-01T08:13:00.000+10:00

galactically activated buddies, also canine!

A New Year's resolution, despite myself?!

2007-01-01T06:30:00.000+10:00
>what is everybody doing to ring in the New Year?

I did nothing; it does not represent MY New Year, anyway (stupid Gregorian calendar!) ;-P

But I did enjoy at least watching, for the umpteenth time the German New Year's Eve comedy classic, "Der 90. Geburtstag, or Dinner for One", just to see if I would still find it funny, and I did! I still had to laugh out loud at its mostly slapstick antics (brilliant comedic timing, though!), and it does help to just laugh at life's little absurdities sometimes... even if "life's little absurdities" do equate to no more than the butler habitually tripping over a tiger-skin rug - call it the revenge of the tiger, if you like, but I still find it works every time, much like Monty Python's purely slapstick, and totally silly, fish-slapping dance! lol

Speaking of humor, a quizz in Psychology Today magazine got me thinking yesterday. It seems you can break humor down into basically four types:

1) put-down humor, i.e. laughing someone's expense, generally harmless if used to ridicule politicians and those in authority, but wreaking havoc in interpersonal relationships;

2) bonding humor, i.e. "we all seem in the same boat";

3) hate-me humor, self-deprecatory - even brilliant comedians specializing in this can have a dark, self-destructive and even suicidal side;

4) laughing at life (I guess Dinner for One, the European classic, falls into this category!) ;-))

However I discovered with horror that I can tend to use put-down humor, and slightly more even than my also above-average 'laughing at life' type... Despite myself, I feel a "New Year's resolution" coming on, to keep this more in check, and use more of both the bonding and the laughing-at-life kinds instead... ;-))

Maybe the "put-down" tendency comes from the Aussie larrikin, take-the-piss-out-of-anything-that-moves tendency, but when one guy habitually used it on me (as seems generally the case: men tend to use it more on women, because they get socialized to relate in a taunting, teasing, bantering-type manner, and put-down humor does equate to a power, status and control thing), it DID cause the relationship to end very badly indeed! ;-P

I might have occasionally erred on the side of inappropriateness, but nothing like this guy's habitually ripping the shreds off!

"In today's personality stakes, nothing is more highly valued than a sense of humor. We seek it out in others and are proud to claim it for ourselves, perhaps even more than good looks or intelligence. If someone has a great sense of humor, we reason, it means that they are happy, socially confident and have a healthy perspective on life.

"This attitude would have surprised the ancient Greeks, who believed humor to be essentially aggressive." (Psychology Today, August 2006).

And the ancient Greeks seem strangely in tune here with primatologists and evolutionary biologists, who identify the bared-teeth grimace of chimpanzees (the origin of our laughter) as a threatening sign of aggression.

So, humor can amount to a valuable communication tool, like any other, but do realize that it also amounts to a double-edged tool, and has its dark side like any other, and do become aware of when, and how, you use it!

You can probably find this article, and quizz, by googling the magazine, and looking up the archives? I thoroughly recommend it! ;-))

Quite a dream I had last night!

2006-12-27T05:52:00.000+10:00
Blue Crystal Night... quite a night for dreaming in the Mayan calendar, and quite a dream I had last night!
I dreamt I worked with Deanna at Gawith Villa (not unusual lately), and Deanna looked exceptionally glamorous, and Helsy spoke to me! Just one word at a time, but very clear and lucid, and appropriate to the context, e.g. as I pointed to pictures in a book, she could name things, even the slightly more abstract "ticket". So I wanted to take both Deanna and Helsy for a walk, and Helsy seemed exceptionally delighted when I called her "Helsy-Belsy"! lol Alister congratulated me on relating better to Helsy than I had the previous day (apparently, i.e. with my usual non-comprehension of her)... During our walk, something terrible, and yet wonderful in a dreamlike way, happened: we reached a narrow laneway we had to negotiate before we could get in or out, and with help Helsy got out of her chair and, deciding she could see no other way around it, began to climb the wall, Spider-woman fashion! I watched with bated breath, and much anxiety, as she began to fall, fortunately straight into my waiting arms. Craig-os happened to watch at the time, and I wondered if this would incur any repercussions... ;-P

Verlaine by Dornac

2006-12-18T22:03:00.000+10:00
The portraits that the celebrated Parisian photographer Paul Marsan Dornac collected and published as Les Contemporains Chez Eux show the notable figures of Paris in their private cabinets de travail surrounded by artworks, books and tools of their trade. Uniquely, this 1896 photo of the great poet and habitual absintheur Paul Verlaine shows this melancholic figure in the last year of his life with his ever-present glass of absinthe seated in a café. The location is believed to be the Café François Ier, although it may also show the Café Procope, which to this day has similar leather banquettes against the walls.

Carl Sagan on 'Ramtha': things we would like Ramtha to tell us!

2006-12-17T13:40:00.000+10:00
"J.Z.Knight of the State of Washington claims to be in touch with a 35,000-year-old somebody called 'Ramtha'. He speaks English very well, using Knight's tongue, lips and vocal cords, producing what sounds to me like an accent from the Indian Raj. Since most people know how to talk, and many - from children or professional actors - have a repertoire of voices at their command, the simplest hypothesis is that Ms Knight makes 'Ramtha' speak all by herself, and that she has no contact with disembodied entities from the Pleistocene Ice Age. If there's evidence to the contrary, I'd love to hear it. It would be considerably more impressive if Ramtha could speak all by himself, without the assistance of Ms Knight's mouth. Failing that, how might we test the claim? (The actress Shirley Maclaine attests that Ramtha was her brother in Atlantis, but that's another story.)

"Suppose Ramtha were available for questioning. Could we verify whether he is who he says he is? How does he know that he lived 35,000 years ago, even approximately? What calendar does he employ? Who is keeping track of the intervening millenia? Thirty-five thousand plus or minus what? Either Ramtha really is 35,000 years old, or he's a phoney and he'll (or rather she'll) slip up.

"Where did Ramtha live? (I know he speaks English with an Indian accent, but where 35,000 years ago did they do that?) What was the climate? What did Ramtha eat? (Archaeologists know something about what people ate back then.) What were the indigenous languages and social structure? Who else did Ramtha live with - wife, wives, children, grandchildren? What was the life cycle, the infant mortality rate, the life expectancy? Did they have birth control? What clothes did they wear? How were the clothes manufactured? What were the most dangerous predators? Hunting and fishing implements and strategies? Weapons? Endemic sexism? Xenophobia and ethnocentrism? And if Ramtha came from the 'high civilisation' of Atlantis, where are the linguistic, technological, historical and other details? What was their writing like? Tell us. Instead, all we are offered are banal homilies."

- Carl Sagan, Ch. 12 ("The Fine Art of Baloney Detection"), The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark (pp. 191-2).

And re "chaos magic": How does its celebrated and much-quoted dictum, "Nothing is true; everything is permitted" differ so much from the wildly irresponsible assertion of Adolf Hitler: "A new era of the magical explanation of the world is rising, an explanation based on will rather than knowledge. There is no truth, in either the moral or the scientific sense"? (ibid., quoted on p. 249).

working on mandala

2006-12-13T06:00:00.000+10:00

working on mandala

Results of Victorian state election

2006-11-25T20:45:00.000+10:00
Phew! It seems finally over, and thank god/dess the Libs did not get in, once again, in our fair state of Victoria... Having said that, some aspects of the ABC's election coverage disturbed me: no mention at all of Malvern, the electorate I visited to hand out how-to-vote cards for People Power, a new political party furthering the interests of the disabled and mentally ill, in particular, represented by Deb Holmes in that area... In fact, no mention of People Power, Deb Holmes or Malvern whatsoever! Perhaps because it seemed all too foregone a conclusion (extreme Liberal stronghold, held by a margin of 10.2%), so Deb demonstrated some guts even having a go! Also held previously, interestingly enough, by previous Liberal premier Henry Bolte and the retired leader, Robert something-or-other (who cares?), in favor of Ted Baillieu, who continues to hold the seat of Hawthorn... Ted Baillieu has a gorgeous-looking wife and kids, btw, and I did like how his little son, in particular, put him temporarily on the spot, by saying that no, he would not vote for Ted Baillieu, unless Ted Baillieu got him a hot dog! lol

I had to go to the website, not the TV, to find out most of the above, except for the Ted trivia! lol

o O... I think they just mentioned People Power, for the first time, on TV, at 9:44 pm...in the context of eastern Victoria, small parties and balance of power in the upper house (actually technically the Legislative Council in Victoria, as opposed to Legislative Assembly, the lower house, for all you non-Victorians!) ;-))

In my own electorate of Prahran, we did not have a People Power candidate (too safe a Labor seat?), so I had to go Green with Labor preferences, as, it seems, also did plenty of others, although voting 1 People Power in our newly democratic (proportionally, as opposed to preferentially, represented) upper house seemed easy-peasy! ;-))

And Nards, a fellow wyrdling down Warrnambool way, gets to keep his Liberal member, the very snide Denis Napthine (whose wife I remember as a fellow teacher)! Oh, joy, he can keep him! ;-P

P.S. For Americans, Labor corresponds roughly to your Democrat, and Liberal to your Republican, believe it or not!

The worst dream!

2006-11-24T05:22:00.000+10:00
Having worried for some time whether Bjorn Erik has died or not, I dreamt: I did get to see him, but he didn't want to know me; when I asked him, in Norwegian, "Do you think I'm ugly?", he just replied, "Yes, I think you're ugly..." ;-P

Have you heard the one about...? lol

2006-11-21T07:31:00.000+10:00
Bill Clinton, Al Gore and George W. Bush went to a fitness spa for some fun. After a stimulating, healthy lunch, all three decided to visit the men's room where they found a strange-looking gent sitting at the entrance. He said: "Welcome to the gentlemen's room. Be sure to check out our newest feature, a mirror that, if you look into it and say something truthful, you will be rewarded with your wish. But be warned, if you say something false, you will be sucked into the mirror to live in a void of nothingness for all eternity!" The three men quickly entered and upon finding the mirror, Bill Clinton stepped up and said, "I think I'm the most intelligent of us three," and he suddenly found the keys to a brand new Bentley in his hands. Al Gore stepped up and said, "I think I'm the most ambitious of us three," and in an instant, he was surrounded by a pile of money to fund his next Presidential Campaign. Excited over the possibility of finally having a wish come true, George W. Bush looked into the mirror and said, "I think...," and was instantly sucked into the mirror.

An angry email I just sent to the Age

2006-11-16T15:23:00.000+10:00
As a volunteer in the disability sector, I attended this week the pre-election forum held by the Coalition for Disability Rights, and felt depressed and disturbed to learn that, at this stage of the election campaign, neither major party has yet revealed its policy on disability services, and people have already begun to vote postally! The Minister for Community Services, Sheryl Garbutt, described the ALP's, almost with some smugness, as "a closely guarded secret", and I have the feeling that both major parties must have something to hide in this area. The Shadow Minister, Andrea Coote, seemed no better, as I learned that in her whole time in Parliament she has only put one question on disability services to Parliament, on record in Hansard, and doesn't an Opposition have to continually put hard questions to the government, to represent a viable Opposition? I think that both major parties have to hide their extremely low prioritisation of people with disabilities, their carers and families, and their extremely high support needs, and quality of life issues!

The promised universal wheelchair access in public buildings should begin with Parliament House itself, as I would have found it impossible to accompany a wheelchaired client on the Parliament House tour, as I could an able-bodied one!

I felt further appalled and outraged to read on page 1 of the Age yesterday (Wednesday) that this government can find $10,000,000 to spend on more guns for police, and the Victorian police at that, with their trigger-happy reputation, including taser stun guns and semi-automatics. I don't know what everyone else thinks, but I think it shows pretty skew-whiff and dodgy priorities, when they think that people expect to welcome them back with open arms for this, as if we need more police guns, like the proverbial hole in the head? How about thinking about real people with real needs, as in the disability services sector, for a change?

Yours sincerely,

Claire Pedersen

P.S. A pox on both their houses, and more power to People Power!

P.P.S. And it has not only snowed in November: it has also apparently snowed in southern Queensland in November - unheard of! Hell freezes over as we speak, but hopefully the rain has gone some way towards ending the drought! ;-O

The inner meaning of my recurring Sims dreams?

2006-11-14T04:32:00.000+10:00
http://mmothra.blogspot.com/2005/01/crazy-hassan-his-clearinghouse-of.html

"Yule passes, and the sun comes dancing in joyfully. Crazy Hassan catches the sun up in his hands and dances with it, faster and faster. The sky swirls, day sky, night sky, morning and evening skies. "Nothing is True!! No truth anywhere!!," sings Crazy Hassan joyfully."

I love this; somehow it hints at the inner meaning of my recurring Sims dreams? ;-))

And, yes, Crazy Hassan seems strikingly apposite, not to mention a propos, as a/THE coyote/chaote figure? ;-))

"Space dust forms suns. Suns and planets form solar systems, solar systems form galaxies, galaxies form countless multiverses which flood the whirling fabric of spacetime as Crazy Hassan's laughter roars joyfully throughout."

>And Acme is very similar to Hassan I Sabbah's Clearing house of Delights

Hehe! And happy birthday to Bjorn Erik, wherever you find yourself, and many happy recurring solar returns!

And indeed everything happened in my astral scenarios last night, from someone suffering a fatal (?) beesting attack while making honey and beeswax at the honey-and-beeswax-making station, to a naked couple copulating on a lounge room floor, to orphaned kiddies trying to smuggle their way into new adoptive residences... ;-))

Finally...another dream!!!

2006-11-08T15:52:00.000+10:00
I felt like I got a bit out of synch. with the Astral and Dream course last week, due to difficulties early in the week, actually downloading the course material videos, and feel almost a week behind as I start week 5, but only a couple of days, really! And last night, I did have another Sims dream, in which a character (me? Cornelia? Baba Yaga? one of the characters of myself as crone, anyway!) started creating a really magical site or lot, for herself, but also as a public magical venue: she still got the disintegration effect, but, as fast as things disintegrated, they got replaced by more magical "mystery boxes" for her to open, and either use, or sell for more buckeroos or Magic Coins, with the result that she ended up, (if "ended up" seems the right word, because the process or project has not actually finished!) developing a magical site with pay booths for different magical attractions, food stalls, sandwich boards advertising the place, stages for magical performances, to attract the crowds, etc.! I wish, I wish, I wish, I could do all this, in the real, mundane game!!

St Odhran update:

2006-10-30T04:04:00.000+10:00
The Madeline Bray and Smike characters not enjoying their stay in the underworld so much (too Christian, not pagan enough?); their set-up seemed completely dysfunctional, with box-like rooms without windows or doors, toilet parked outside in the kitchen, etc.! ;-P

2006-10-28T12:56:00.000+10:00
Phar Lap beats Second Wind and Shadow King in the 1930 Melbourne Cup.

Phar Lap

2006-10-28T12:52:00.000+10:00
Phar Lap beats Reveille Boy and Scimitar in the Agua Caliente handicap, 1932.

Ode to Pharlap
(4 of Wands: against all odds)

"he wasn't just a horse"
(Harry Telford, trainer)

"that's my Bobby boy"
(Tommy Woodcock, strapper, and final trainer)

he, Phar Lap
(lightning in Thai),
aka. the Red Terror,
aka. Bobby boy,

came to Agua Caliente

the place of hot springs, in Spanish

red as fire
to the fiery springs
ran like the wind, and lightning, as usual
with half his hoof hanging off
as the hard Mexican stones
cut into his feet
lucky a horse's feet hardly touch the ground when galloping

"he would run, and win,
even with no legs",
said his trainer

4 of Wands: seemingly impossible
marriage of fire and water
against all odds

creates a freak, a wonder,
a god in equine form,
whose like we had not seen before,
nor have seen since
(although he had the previous wonder Carbine in his bloodlines,
both sire and dam seemed duds)

duds too, all the other yearlings
trained by Harry Telford

Phar Lap would have done what he did
no matter who trained him,
his trainer realised in near despair

but only if he had a trainer
with the hard head of a Harry Telford
and a strapper
with the softness of heart of a Tommy Woodcock

head and heart so often opposed each other
hardness and softness,
yang and yin
embodied in the two men, one older, the other younger -

"who gives the orders around here?"

what their "marriage" produced
seemed a heart on legs, all heart
the largest heart ever seen in a horse
itself a freak of nature:
imagine the immensity of those four bursting chambers!

and to think that the harsh stony desert of Mexico
could put down a New Zealand/Australian champion!

he ran every race as if it were his last

he put all his heart into it, every time

and all hearts, Australian and Mexican, went out to him

he ran every race as if doing battle with the lords of death,
the rulers of the underworld

R.I.P.
killed by greed

fitting epitaph for a nation's hero, and legend

even if the greedy element in that nation began to kill him

before the greed of the other did!

America, we would hate you for your greed,

if we did not feel more shame at our own

(c) Claire Pedersen, 28/10/06
(springtime brings on thoughts of horse-racing, and the medicine wheel thoughts of horses and horse dreaming:
the power animal of power itself -
they don't call it "horse power" for nothing!)

A serious sequel to the previous dream

2006-10-28T08:53:00.000+10:00
Last night's dream seemed a little strange, even by my wyrd standards! In the dream, there appeared a little child, a boy, Smike, as it turned out, whom I had created after reading Nicholas Nickleby by Charles Dickens, hoping to give him a better childhood with Nicholas and his bride Madeline Bray than he had had at Dotheboys Hall, under Mr Squeers, in the book. Unfortunately, however, in the game, the relationship between Nicholas and Madeline did not take off, although Smike soon graduated to "superkid" status... In my dream, he retraced his steps back through past journeys, visiting milestone-places; someone had told him that if he deleted any objects he had left behind in those places, whatever pursued him (Mr Squeers, the abominable schoolmaster?) would lose the scent, and ability to follow... At first he therefore went around deleting objects, then, when it seemed that Nicholas and not Mr Squeers pursued him, he stopped deleting, in the hopes of a reunion, and, indeed, a better life. But, when Nicholas finally caught up with him, strangely enough, he did not want a reunion, although he loved the child fondly in the book, and mourned his death; he exercised an option instead, which caused Smike and Madeline to sink slowly beneath the ground, among the apple trees of Appleview Farm (where they had lived), to find themselves later transported to another "village" (neighbourhood, in the game?) for safe keeping...

The "sinking beneath the earth" motif seems a strange one, because it does also correspond with the Celtic legend of St Odhran, i.e. a necessary "sacrifice" by voluntary burial. I had wondered how to logistically accomplish this in the game, and this dream solved the problem for me! St Odhran also discovered, to Columcille's horror as an orthodox Christian, that hell or the underworld did not seem so bad after all! So maybe, for the good of the whole game, I should allow the Nicklebys to "sacrifice" themselves, since they seem to "volunteer" for this! (Maybe also the Saint Odhran character himself?) I also wonder about the strangely evocative overtones of the connection with apples, and apple trees... ;-))

This dream also corresponds with today's cyber-Tarot of the "9 of Stones", i.e. extreme earthiness, giving oneself up to the element of earth, and I Ching:

"The present is embodied in Hexagram 14 - Ta Yu (Possession in Great Measure): There will be great progress and success.
In the first (or lowest) line, undivided, there is no approach to what is injurious, and there is no error. Let there be a realisation of the difficulty and danger of the position, and there will be no error.
The third line, undivided, shows us a feudal prince presenting his offerings to the Son of Heaven. A small man would be unequal to such a duty.
The fourth line, undivided, shows its subject keeping his great resources under restraint. There will be no error.
The situation is shifting, and Yin (the passive feminine force) is gaining ground.
The future is embodied in Hexagram 4 - Meng (Youthful Folly): There will be progress and success. I do not go and seek the youthful and inexperienced, but he comes and seeks me. When he shows the sincerity that marks the first recourse to divination, I instruct him. If he apply a second and third time, that is troublesome, and I do not instruct the troublesome. There will be advantage in being firm and correct.
The things most apparent, those above and in front, are embodied by the upper trigram Li (Fire), which is tansforming into Ken (Mountain). As part of this process, brightness and warmth are giving way to stillness and obstruction.
The things least apparent, those below and behind, are embodied by the lower trigram Chi'en (Heaven), which is transforming into K'an (Water). As part of this process, strength and creativity are giving way to danger and the unknown."

A big increase in astral/dream lucidity to report!

2006-10-27T03:47:00.000+10:00
While still not perfect, I have a big increase in astral/dream lucidity to report, over last night's. This time I remember the names of my astral Sims, Robyn and Phyllis (or Louise?), two charming old spinsters in quaint, old-fashioned clothing, with lace collars and cameos and all, overlapping another Sims household, which seems a strong indication that my astral/magical Sims characters do in fact represent an astral dimension of the mundane Sims game, or even parallel universe to it! They arranged their astral Sims household with rather more order than last night's more shadowy figures, and even had a little blue (watery?) dragon this time, sleeping in their kitchen, which seems a major improvement over the little red Burnie, that seems all my mundane Sims can score, which still has pyromaniac tendencies, despite the best and most affectionate of attentions! They even had a flourishing garden, beginning with a cluster of topiary, including hedges trimmed into dolphin shapes, and banks of flower-beds three deep! ;-))

So, mundanely introducing St Odhran, who has his feastday today, as Celtic "patron saint of the underworld", as my patron, really did help? Thank you, Brendan, of slouchingbuddha@yahoogroups.com, for the synchronicities! ;-))

P.S. The little blue dragon, as Dragon of Water, also corresponds to today's cyber-Tarot of the Ace of Cups, and the rune Laguz, also of water?! ;-))

"...one night
there's a heartbeat at the door.
Outside, a woman in the fog,
with hair of twigs and a dress of weed,
dripping green lake water.
She says, 'I am you,
and I have traveled a long distance.
Come with me, there is something I must show you...'
She turns to go, her cloak falls open,
Suddenly, golden light... everywhere, golden light..."
("Woman Who Lives Under the Lake", from C.P.Estes, Rowing Songs for the Night Sea Journey, Contemporary Chants, privately published, 1989).

The only recurring dream (with minor variations) of my life so far

2006-10-26T08:36:00.000+10:00
Just last night, I found myself confronted with the only recurring dream of my life: that same, weird, magical, astral Sims scenario, which seems mostly too dark to see, and a lot of it happens underground anyway; I cannot know who plays the game, or even where they live, except I have the vague feeling they often represent "royalty" (kings, princesses etc.). They busily amass magical riches and assets in the half-dark (shades of Hades/Persephone?), and even had a cute little golden earth-dragon called Urdu (after one of the Norns?), as opposed to the nasty fire-dragon called Burnie; Urdu grew from a golden egg, and set about digging underground tunnels everywhere, but, just as the house fills up with a mad clutter of every conceivable magical asset and gimmick, they quickly disintegrate, seemingly with a half-life of decay of their own, and they find themselves back to square one! Last night, while still dreaming, I called this "the kingdom of the Id", in Freudian terms, to myself, since it seems all about gratifying the momentary pleasure principle, with little light or direction from the conscious ego, which could at least help with some sort of ordered layout... So I set out to introduce a little ego-light, direction and consciousness into it, to make it into a "kingdom of the conscious Ego", and did attain moments of clarity, spotlights on objects here and there, but later still the process of astral entropy took over again, and once again we found ourselves back at square one! ;-P

Note from Wikipedia: "In Norse Mythology Urd (ON: Urðr) is one of the three Norns (old crones). Her name means that which has become, and is related to the English word weird. She was also called the Dís of Death."

Schizotypal personality traits

2006-10-22T07:33:00.000+10:00
"only 1% are diagnosed schizophrenic, and a similarly small percentage clinically manic depressive. Most of us just have a few quirks [60-70% of the adult population, according to one study!].
"Because several important research studies have now established a definite correlation between schizotypal personality and a propensity to have certain sorts of religious experience, and because, as we shall see, being somewhat schizotypal seems to confer a definite advantage on humanity, it is important that we recognise the features that define this state of mind. The degree of each depends upon where on the scale between normal and psychotic an individual is situated.
"According to most assessments, a schizotypal person exhibits the following nine personality traits to varying degrees:
"MAGICAL IDEATION, which means a tendency to think that one's thoughts have a physical power or that they can come true (if I wish bad luck on someone and it happens, thinking made it happen); also, a tendency to see significance in the correlation of supposedly unrelated events (like black cats and bad luck), or in mundane objects such as crystals, bones or anything that might serve as a talisman. Whether such magical ideation is considered schizotypal or normal is, of course, culture-dependent; in many societies such associations are regarded as mainstream.
"EASY DISTRACTION. The highly schizotypal poet Rilke expressed his easy distractibility as, 'If there is noise, I give myself up and am that noise.' A more seriously schizophrenic patient commented, 'I attend to everything at once and thus I do not attend to anything.'
"A TENDENCY TO FANTASIZE OR DAYDREAM, and sometimes not to know the difference between fantasy and reality.
"LOOSENESS OF THOUGHT, or 'thought slippage'. The individual's thoughts don't have the usual logical restrictions and boundaries, so he or she makes connections between things that others might not make.
"IMPULSIVE NON-CONFORMITY, in other words just acting on impulse; sometimes odd speech, odd behavior or eccentric dress."
(Only just Friday my 'interesting' and 'eccentric' manner of dress received yet another comment! lol)
"UNUSUAL EXPERIENCES, such as the visual and auditory kind associated with spiritual experiences...
"INTROVERSION: liking one's own company and preferring solitary pursuits.
"SOCIAL ANHEDONIA, also known as 'integrative pleasure deficiency': a diminished ability to enjoy social encounters, usually accompanied by a tendency to withdraw from them. Physical anhedonia is a diminished pleasure in sensory experience [e.g. taste of food?! ;P].
"AMBIVALENCE: not being able to make up one's mind, because the individual can see the value or possibility of both or many alternatives."
(from "the 'God Spot' in the Brain", Spiritual Intelligence: the Ultimate Intelligence, Dana Zohar and Ian Marshall, pp. 104-5).

Pin the tail (and the ears) on the wossname!

2006-10-19T15:51:00.000+10:00
OK, in last night's Sims dream (yes, another! lol), someone led a donkey about, through all the rooms in the houses, that looked just like this... Guess what? That dream might have had something vaguely precogniscent about it, because guess who seemed the donkey today? Ee-yours truly! ;-P

A nasty, sleazy, little Freudian dream

2006-10-18T07:46:00.000+10:00
Yet another Sims dream, and this time taking place significantly enough in the same house, with the same layout, as last night's (i.e. the bedrock of the psyche?): only this time the drama plays out between a father, a daughter and a serving-maid, all in old-fashioned clothing, quasi-medieval. The father conceives a lust for his daughter, but does not want to act on this, for fear of the complete tabu on incest, so he transfers his lust in turn to the serving-wench, also young and pretty, but he knows, if he forces himself upon her, and her into his antique canopy four-poster bed (as opposed to her Spartan, single, dorm-style one), she could make his life hell by never, ever returning his affections... So the father seems caught in a painful erotic dilemma! I still feel Freud would have done better to stick with his original seduction hypothesis (he had right gut-instincts re the revelations of his patients), rather than allowing a colleague, himself the abuser of his own 10 year old son, to sway him into changing it into the so-called "wish-fulfilment theory"; you wish I wished for that, daddy! This dream leaves the nastiest taste in my mouth yet, of all the dreams so far, since the start of the Astral and Dream course ;-P

Powerful dream totems have arisen also, this new month of the Self-Existing Owl (a personal totem of mine, and, interestingly, in the light of its initial dream, associated with my right, or father's, side!): Lizard and Bear, the dreaming power-totems par excellence!

Also interestingly, for omens on the breaking of the drought, Dragonfly has brought Frog, and might find herself able to tickle Tiddalik into coughing up all that water he has greedily swallowed! I choose as my patron Mayan deity this month Chac, god of rain and lightning: who else?

Interestingly, Horse, the power animal of Power itself, binds together both this month's themes of Dreaming and Drought-Breaking:

"Mighty Horse,
Power to run
Across the open plains,

Or to bring the vision,
Of the shields
Dancing in purple dream rain."
- Jamie Sims, Animal Medicines.

Week 2 of astral and dream course: visualization

2006-10-17T07:30:00.000+10:00
Still flat out dreaming, and recalling dreams, and still dreaming about the Sims! Only this time it seemed about one of my older female Sims (the first Baba Yaga, since evicted for failure to perform?): it seemed she carried on a whole life underground, with underground mansions, abducted princesses, or maybe her daughters, who knows? Something of the Persephone myth about this one, Baba Yaga having something of Hades (underground riches) about her! I only wished, again, I could have seen more of the goings-on in the light... ;-))

Interesting correspondence with today's I Ching:
The present is embodied in Hexagram 36 - Ming I (Darkening of the Light): It will be advantageous to realize the difficulty of the position, and maintain firm correctness.
There are no changing lines, and hence the situation is expected to remain the same in the immediate future.
The things most apparent, those above and in front, are embodied by the upper trigram K'un (Earth), which represents docility and receptivity.
The things least apparent, those below and behind, are embodied by the lower trigram Li (Fire), which represents brightness and warmth.

Day 5, dream course

2006-10-16T08:13:00.000+10:00
Last night I dreamt a murder happened in the Sims: an ABC TV drama I watched simultaneously played out in one of my richer Sims houses, but among poorer, hard-working, farming characters, and the tension apparently erupted in violence; I heard the warning alert sound, as it does when something serious happens, but had no idea to what it referred, and no one called the police, as they did not notice or realise what had happened either. The body just lay there, in a pool of blood; also, I did not see the Grim Reaper come visit, as it usually does when a character dies of "natural" causes, like a fire or something... It broke my heart to see it just lying there.
Moral of this story: Sims characters, as astral entities, like any other aspect of the personality, do indeed have a "life of their own", and will slowly bleed to death, if ignored, deleted, evicted, etc.? ;-P

Day 4, Dream course

2006-10-15T11:02:00.000+10:00
I recalled a dream again last night: hey, this progressive muscular relaxation before sleep really does work, for dream recall! Again, I dreamt about a Sims character called Colin, who seemed to accumulate a huge number of magical assets, but as yet did not know what to do with them (a pretty fair summary of the Makin' Magic game neighbourhoods so far! lol

And if this drought continues, will we end up like China, I wonder?

http://anthropik.com/2006/08/chinas-water-crisis/

Day 3 Dream course

2006-10-14T09:54:00.000+10:00
I dreamt I found myself as a Sims character called Colin, funnily enough, and, like the Colin in waking life, "too much of a poet, and too little of anything else" (Holderlin) or "only a fool, only a poet" (Nietzsche) ;-))

Day 2 Astral course: Won't you take me to Magic Town?

2006-10-13T05:45:00.000+10:00
I have found my muggles characters in the Sims no more magical with the Makin' Magic pack than when they started, and some distinctly less so, but, waking several times last night, after going to sleep doing the relaxation, I found I had a whole family in Magic Town, which I could barely make out, as they had no more bright lighting than the Buddha-light at the time, so I don't know their names or address, but they seemed to have a baby, another little child, a girl, a restaurant with zombi servitors as waiters and waitresses, a whole pod of fairies for the child/ren to play with, and a very weird but magical-looking bed I could barely make out, dimly lit in red, but looking something like the Sleeping Beauty... I want to go and make Magic Town my default neighbourhood, as this seems where the real magic and fairytales happen, but I do not know how, and I have not found www.thesims.com much use so far, so downloading, importing and exchanging stuff; I can read Sims web pages, but not comment on them, and I don't know where you get the supposed cheats and tips! So translating the magic into the mundane seems a bit of a challenge so far, and I guess that seems the 'moral' or upshot of this dream/astral story ;-P

Lobster telephone, a la Dali and Winnie!

2006-10-12T02:58:00.000+10:00
If I had a mobile phone that did not challenge me, I would enjoy it in a Daliesque design like the one shown here, maybe with an I am the Walrus ringtone, that would definitely stand out in a crowd! lol

Day/night 1 of the Astral Travel and Dreams course at gnosticweb: Despite my fears and misgivings on reading and viewing the excellent course material for the week, all went well tonight, as I woke up, after going to sleep doing the progressive muscular relaxation exercise, and did not have to jump out of bed to go to the loo, and the first dream/astral thing that occurred to me seemed the little, simple Sims projection I found holographically projected in the Buddha-light on the ceiling (Sims and TV deprivation last night, through catching up with email?!) - just a cupboard this time, containing something like a fancy hot tub... That led me into creating whole new Sims characters in my mind, on the astral, and moving them into new Porte Rouge villas (my favorite, or ideal, Southern-type mansion), working out who I would move in with a downloaded McDonald's franchise, to attract customers to the lot as a new enterprise, maybe with a popcorn vendor stand, as well as leaving room for giant vibrating love-beds, heart-shaped hot tubs, faithful robot or zombi servitors etc. Forget the so-called 'Sims magic': these little Sims projections on my ceiling I wake up to seem little astral portals indeed, although it took me hardly any mundane time at all to run through endless astral possibilities, perhaps in a parallel astral universe, in my mind; talk about the lion, the witch and the Sims astral wardrobe! lol

Although it took me no time at all to mentally run through all this, it took me so little time in fact (without even needing to do the dream-recall mantra), that I may have to go back to bed just to rest, as I see the clock time does not even read 3 am yet, after only 4 1/2 hours sleep or so, although funnily enough, I do not feel tired, and quite refreshed (maybe it pays to use your sleep-time more efficiently this way, by allowing yourself time to go to sleep in a more "conscious" and mindful way!) ;-))

(ii) I did have to go back to sleep for a bit more rest, and turned up a second dream fragment, in the same Sims format: me with Josh as a little kid, toddler, a recurring theme for me anyway; maybe I should have pursued that one further, and used the mantra, but I felt like I had already done enough work for one night! ;-))

A very, very funny video...

2006-10-08T11:06:00.000+10:00
...about August Strindberg, absinthe and a bizarre little character called Helium; check it out at Comedy Central! (Ignore the message that you won't find it available till 2007: just enable the popups, and it works!) ;-))

http://www.strindbergandhelium.com/absinthe.html

They also have a really funny one about the Shrub and his famous mispronouncements, as well as numerous on cartoon characters, such as Mortimer Koon (speaking of animal medicines, try a wacky raccoon on for size!) and the maximum security ward for animated characters that never saw the light of day... Thanks, Winnie, for making my day with these! hehe

o O - the inner meaning of today's Tarot, the Devil: a new addiction, to add to my collection of addictions? I now find myself addicted to Strindberg and Helium cartoons ("Heliuuum!"), when I had never heard of them before; thanks again, Winnie! I did not have nearly enough addictions, and now just cannot get enough of this one, either! lol

Today's I Ching

2006-10-05T05:57:00.000+10:00
>The present is embodied in Hexagram 9 - Hsiao Ch'u (The Taming Power of the Small): There will be progress and success. We see dense clouds, but no rain coming from our borders in the west.
There are no changing lines, and hence the situation is expected to remain the same in the immediate future.
o O...more of the same, i.e. drought?
>The things most apparent, those above and in front, are embodied by the upper trigram Sun (Wind), which represents penetration and following.
>The things least apparent, those below and behind, are embodied by the lower trigram Chi'en (Heaven), which represents strength and creativity.
i.e. more sun and wind but no rain? I had better go learn some weather magic... ;-P

Red Self-Existing Earth: a day of synchronicity!

2006-10-02T08:33:00.000+10:00
A spooky thing, this day of synchronicity ( this Red Self-Existing Earth does not mess about - but best to stay grounded, although at times Red, earthy days, like Skywalker, tend to want to go into orbit!): I just got the same Tarot card three days in a row, in three separate decks, all before me, as we speak - Arcanum V, the Hierophant (or Pope: Dalai Lama in my Tarot): the Hierophant, looking very Sufi-like in the Tarot of Ceremonial Magick, Ganesh/Lord of Obstacles, seated in the centre of a spider web, in the Secret Dakini Oracle, and "Master of the Head", or spirit-guide, who "dances on the head of the Fool" (i.e. for me, Papa Legba) in the Voodoo Tarot.

What can this mean but the blessings of spiritual friendship?

I also just read about this in Women Who Run With The Wolves this morning:

"Having a lover/friend who regards you as a living growing criatura, just as much as the tree from the ground, or a ficus in the house, or a rose bush out in the side yard... having a lover or friends who regard you as a true living breathing entity, one that is human but made of very fine and moist and magical things as well... a lover and friends who support the criatura in you... these are the people you are looking for. They will be the friends of your soul for life. Mindful choosing of friends and lovers, not to mention teachers, is critical to remaining conscious, remaining intuitive, remaining in charge of the fiery light that sees and knows."

- Clarissa Pinkola Estes (p. 110).

Colin Jenkins, of Gawith Villa, also has some very good things to say about picking the real from the phonies in his book; in its interspersing of poems with snippets of haiku-like prose, it rather reminds me of Basho's Deep Road to the North!

"When we travelled to Bendigo [in Victoria] we saw some nuggets of gold as well as black opals. The black opals we found made us very happy. We were so sure that by selling them we would become wealthy. However, here I am still trying to sell my stories.

"When I was at Mt Gambier [in South Australia] I noticed the lake was as blue as the Pacific Ocean; ever more so on the southern part of it. I also noticed that the mountain looked incredibly blue.

"That blue lake is right on the border between Victoria and South Australia. When I was on the Murray Princess boat, I was taking photographs of my friends. However, I was distracted by the lovely things I noticed; white and black swans. Strangely, these photographs didn't turn out very well. My friends are blurry in the pictures, but the swans look fantastic.

"Later we travelled to the Twelve Apostles. Some of these Apostles must have been in church, because I could only count eight of them." [In fact, only seven of this Victorian landmark off the Great Ocean Road remain now, lost to sea erosion! But I love how Colin says they must have found themselves in church, or something! lol]

"After our swim we continued our walk to the cave. When we arrived I wanted to see if we could find any hidden treasure but it was too deep and too dark to see. I was worried about going inside. Anything or anyone may have been guarding that treasure.

"On another day I went to Eden with my parents. We saw a mineral fountain and tried the water. The water was so clean and good tasting that we decided to stay for a few days. We joked that Eden must have been the lost garden of Eden. This seemed even funnier when I realised that the bananas I had been eating during our time in Eden came, in fact, from Queensland. We wanted to taste the delights of Eden but were only eating phonies." [lol!] (Colin Jenkins, The Good Lady Witch, pp. 22-23).

And a poem of his I think you will also like follows:

"A POEM BASED ON THE STORY 'WALK WITH A WOLF'

The watery sun is puncturing the light
through the misty cloud
To the South the clouds are greyishly light
The bare branches of the spruce trees
look like a lady's laughter
She laughs with the howling wolves
They are subtle, gracious, eminent."

- Colin Jenkins, ibid., p. 24.

>The plot thickens, just like barley soup.

*stirring soup vigorously, and enthusiastically!* ;-))

The idea of Red Self-Existing Earth (and synchronicity) also seems to sit well with today's I Ching:

The present is embodied in Hexagram 11 - T'ai (Peace): We see the lesser gone and greatness come upon us. There will be good fortune, with progress and success.

The first (bottommost) line, undivided, suggests the idea of grass pulled up, and bringing with it other stalks with whose roots it is connected. Advance on the part of its subject will be fortunate.

(i.e. interconnectedness at grass roots level?) ;-))

The fifth line, divided, reminds us of king Ti-yi's rule about the marriage of his younger sister. By such a course there is happiness and there will be great good fortune.

(Not quite sure what this means, however, but perhaps the idea of forming new connections, new friendships, even perhaps new neural pathways in the brain?) ;-))

The sixth line, divided, show us the city wall returned in to the moat. It is not the time to use the army. The subject of the line may, indeed, announce his orders to the people of his own city. However correct and firm he may be, he will have cause for regret.

The situation is shifting, and Yang (the active masculine force) is gaining ground.

The future is embodied in Hexagram 57 - Sun (Wind): There will be some little attainment and progress. There will be advantage in movement onward in whatever direction. It will be advantageous to see the great man.

The things most apparent, those above and in front, are embodied by the upper trigram K'un (Earth), which is tansforming into Sun (Wind). As part of this process, docility and receptivity are giving way to penetration and following.

Which reminds me of the old Christian song:
"Spirit of God in the clear running water,
...Blow, blow, blow till I be
but breath of the Spirit blowing in me!" ;-))

The things least apparent, those below and behind, are embodied by the lower trigram Chi'en (Heaven), which is transforming into Sun (Wind). As part of this process, strength and creativity are giving way to penetration and following.

Likewise, "Spirit of God, creation is groaning...
blow, blow, blow..." (etc.) ;-))

Frozen in time: the giant squid in the Melbourne Aquarium, 2nd last day!

2006-09-30T18:19:00.000+10:00
Phew! I just made it, and did manage to check out the giant squid in the Melbourne Aquarium,and here you see the sketch I did of it, while standing there; a bit of a challenge for both artist and scanner, believe me! At first, I did not believe I had found it, because it no longer lives, but lies preserved in ice, and lots of other people did not believe it either. But it looks neither very large nor very scary, in its bed of ice... If you still don't believe me, that it really does look a bit like this, the official postcard-photo follows, also a bit of a challenge for the scanner, and, as you see, I could not get the text at all... Its living relatives, the Humboldt squid, called "red devils" by the fishermen of Mexico, seem much scarier, and command a healthy respect!

A good Big Day Out/holiday excursion

2006-09-30T17:33:00.000+10:00
And much as I wanted to, I couldn't entirely escape the footy Grand Final either, because the Aquarium reminded us to catch the last five minutes or so on their own big screen, so I did manage to see the Eagles put a final nail in the Swans' coffin (http://afl.com.au/default.asp?pg=news&spg=display&articleid=301141 pg=news&spg=display&articleid=301141 - you may have to copy and paste this link to the stats as an unbroken link in your browser, if you want to check it!), but it looks like the Swans did not even really get a look-in this day of the Blue Lunar Eagle (see, I told everyone it looked like the omens favored the Eagles, and they have landed!)... I recommend the Aquarium to anyone living in or passing through Melbourne, as it represents a really good day out: funnily enough, a similar cool but sunny, early spring day saw Bjorn Erik and me visit the Bergen Aquarium to check out the spider exhibition, and I reckon a job in the aquarium, especially diving among the sharks and rays at feeding time, would amount to one of the world's coolest jobs! I really envied those divers, but had fun also "diving down" and popping my head up, gopher-like, through some of their little glass bubbles, for a fish-eye view!

Discussing fish "smarts", i.e. memory, learning, communication, sharks came up trumps every time; apparently they recognise the divers individually, despite the anonymity of their wetsuits and helmets, and can apparently sense whether a person seems nervous or relaxed by their heartbeats, and respond appropriately, by either swimming around them in a relaxed way, or avoiding them. They also have a special sensory organ for detecting electrical fields around fish, so maybe they actually read auras? And they have lived longer on this planet than practically anything else, since before the dinosaurs in fact! And now their worst enemy, the worst enemy of practically everything else, seems... us! ;-P And I will keep my eyes open on the beach this summer for a little spiral, rubbery, twisted thing, which you could mistake for a bit of tyre or kelp, that might just possibly represent the egg of a Port Jackson shark (yes, some sharks do lay eggs, although most bear live young!)...or possibly some other weird shape, from some other species? Go, the Sharks! (Why do we not have a footy team named after them, although the Rugby League does have a team called the Cronulla Sharks) ;-))

Welcome to my world!

2006-09-29T18:53:00.000+10:00
A little collage I made: says it all, really! ;-))

Stunning original antique absinthe posters, from La Belle Epoque!

2006-09-28T09:38:00.000+10:00
http://www.absintheoriginals.com/absinthe_posters.html

Sims update: I have got the Goth senior family, grandparents of little Cassandra, to have (not adopt!) another one, when they seemed past their prime, and raise him into little Gomez Fester Adam Goth (thinking of the Addams family), lol! So what relation does he have to Cassandra, i.e. the son of your grandparents? lol

Their huge, haunted mansion, with adjoining cemetery, seemed a bit big and unwieldy, not to mention overfurnished, with all the dying rubber tree potplants, despite the maid and gardener services doing their best, so I moved them all into a slightly smaller mansion, still with ample room to put all their favorite things, and less of the sheer clutter: the Porte Rouge Villa, named for its fancy schmanzy red doors all around the place, downstairs! I think I have created my best ever kid's room, upstairs, for little Gomez, with a picture of an admiral overlooking the study/computer desk, a leopard skin rug on the polished floorboards, and otherwise absolutely every fun thing a child could wish for! Also nice green velvet drapes, like the ones in his parents' master bedroom, and nice white lacy ones on the windows on the landing. I like the feel of this house, and I could actually live in it myself: it has kind of a real, old-fashioned "Southern belle" type feel to it, and a real "New Orleans" atmosphere (but not haunted and oppressive, like their previous mansion), and I also moved in the cutting edge of domestic service technology, a robot servant, which seems all you could ever wish for in domestic service, with the added bonus that you can use the toilet while the robot cleans the bathroom, and not feel embarrassed, unlike with a human maid! They also seem the only one of my families to afford not only Servo, the robot servant, but also both a vibrating love-bed, AND a heart-shaped hot tub (at the upper end of the bed and tub markets)! ;-))

They also have two nice little Siamese cats, appropriately and academically named Hecuba and Aristotle (Gunther works as a college dean).

The only drawback seems that this scenario has crashed on me twice already tonight: only up to the Sims Unleashed (i.e. with pets) expansion pack, and already the program has got a little too big for my computer to handle? ;-P

I WANNA PARTY!!! lol

P.S. I actually judge a family by its kid's rating, as opposed to its parents', and little Gomez's has dropped from an A+ to a B+, despite my best efforts, so I will give them a little time to (hopefully) refresh themselves, before revisiting, OK?

P.P.S. I have re-created the Goth snr family, at a relatively minor level (minus kid!) in neighbourhood one, also in my coveted Porte Rouge villa mansion, hehe!

Future possibilities of weird digital technology?

2006-09-25T15:18:00.000+10:00
Reflecting on the weird things I have seen displayed on my TV screen lately:

(1) the TV still on in the morning, because I basically only put it on late at night to help me to get to sleep, and sometimes someone is reading the news on SBS in Japanese or Russian, or something, only the newsreader looks like a Sim!

(2) Sims scenarios I have not created, let alone saved, playing themselves out wildly on the TV screen, in disaster mode, because uncontrolled by any me at the helm, as "Big Brother/Sister", i.e. fires, houses burning to the ground, war scenes, Sims dying all over the place, etc., as will happen if you leave the game at all unattended; then of course, if left on inadvertently, you always have the option to quit and not save, but when these unsolicited Sims scenarios appear in the corner of my TV screen (or sometimes, more hypnagogically, hologrammatically and mysteriously in the reflected light of my Chinese Buddha ball on the ceiling), you have no control over them, because you never initiated them anyway, and they just fade into the ethers again when you switch the TV or the Buddha ball off... What happens exactly, in these cases, I have no idea, because I usually find myself in a hypnagogic state anyway, and therefore fairly befuddled, and in a quasi-dream-like state anyway...

Help! the Sims have invaded or possessed my TV (not to mention my mind)? But how can they do this in the first place? Since I have turned the computer off, saved such games as I wanted to save, and only left the TV on, to go to sleep... But why should the TV and computer communicate with each other anyway, when neither of them seems particularly communicating with me? Why should the computer in particular communicate anything at all when switched off? (Who said computers did not have their own binary-bit dreams, when in their downtime, switched-off mode? If our brains resemble computers in some ways, why should computers also not resemble our dreaming brains? Deep questions indeed, for the cognitive scientists and AI practitioners among us to ponder, on the cutting edge between psychology, philosophy and computer science/sci fi, here?)

On the practical, or mundane level, I realise it suggests a possibility of captured little animated webshots of live Sims scenarios, and playing them as little animated movies on my TV, although how to do this, I have not the foggiest, at the moment...

Josh possibly has some clues, since he did play a DVD once from my DVD drive directly on to my TV, but I have no idea how he actually did this, and he seemed like a cool computer wizard or magician, at the time!

Somehow it seems related to the fact that I have the computer and TV connected physically to the same power socket in the wall? ;-P

R.I.P. carved Indian peace-pipe :-((

2006-09-20T16:09:00.000+10:00
My carved Indian (from India) old faithful peace-pipe just died on me last night, i.e. it still sucked, but I could not screw the bowl back on to the stem after cleaning, and the main requirement of a working pipe, which sounds pornographic, I know (!) seems that it must both screw AND suck; if it doesn't suck, then, like a vacuum cleaner, it sucks! ;-P

So now I find myself in the market for a new pipe, and the only tobacconist around here that stocks them won't get any till Friday (when it will receive quite a big shipment!) - but in the meantime, I would suffer pipe-deprivation, and must smoke rollies, which I have never done well!... ;-P

So I also went to the bong shop, to see if they had anything in the way of ordinary tobacco pipes, and they had a couple, not much, and their normal ones seemed way too dear, much dearer than in the tobacconist's, so I got a baby corn cob, which doesn't screw (too young to screw? lol), but hopefully it will suck, temporarily, until Friday; and a weird little smoke (from Missouri, USA) it seems too... Funnily enough, Josh's father thought he could see me as an old lady smoking one of those, and I thought him tripping, at the time! lol

And they declare pipe-smoking bad for you, but so far I have outlived all my pipes, so stick that in your pipe and smoke it (as the 10 of Wands in the Voodoo Tarot would say)! lol

Sims update: my second alien abduction, and this time I saw it with my own eyes - Bella Goth, nurse, average job performance, with above-average logic rating, got into a little amateur astronomy, and, while gazing at the stars late at night through their telescope on the 2nd floor balcony, got well and truly "beamed up, Scotty!" Eek! OK, in the interests of "weird science", let us hold it right there, and see how Mortimer does, holding the fort as an average science teacher (with potential to get into a little "weird chemistry" of his own, in Cassandra's 2nd floor kitchenette)...

Cassandra seems no longer a super-kid, btw, rather a "bad little kid" in her "bad little kid" T-shirt, with no interest in either weird chemistry or astronomy...

The Mozarts, however, continue to do well in their new residence, after I resurrected them from their double tragedy (both parents died, one fatal night, of that wandering sickness-virus I told you about, which actually haunted what little sleep I had that night of the "heavenly insomnia"!)... They had a back-from-the-dead party, and rock on - although the hamster died, in the family room (no longer the kid's bedroom, in case their deaths did get caused by an allergy to the hamster!), despite the continued best attentions of A+ Wolfi Junior, so maybe the hamster did carry the fatal virus, in which case, good riddance to bad rubbish? (And maybe they can get a decent pet, when I graduate to Sims with Unleashed Pets?) lol

P.P.S. Yes, in the interests of "weird science", Bella did live to tell of her weird alien-abduction tale (or not!), and came back from her gazing experience with renewed super-powers to repair both little Cassandra's computer (when it went bung!) and the dish-washer, which flooded... So, if she remains a stay-at-home mum after all this, who cares? She will have a wealth of experience to relate, to whoever listens.... ;-))

Today's I Ching

2006-09-20T06:09:00.000+10:00
Today's I Ching, Hexagram 3, "Difficulty at the Beginning", the image of a lady retreating from a suitor to whom she feels attraction, suggests to me the association of playing hard to get, i.e. feigning initial reluctance or unwillingness, will make someone or something pursue you all the harder... Interesting image; not at all sure how it will relate to my life today. What does anyone else with access to the I Ching think?

Since my hexagram of the year equates to number 50, Ting, "The Cauldron", I currently work on constructing a third leg for my cauldron: with the Tarot and runes relatively more familiar, I hope that the I Ching, in its relative unfamiliarity, will supply a more stable base for my bubbling witches' brew ;-))

Hexagram 1, Active Heaven

2006-09-19T06:31:00.000+10:00
With yesterday's hexagram, according to The Tao of Chaos, insomnia seems a very real possibility, and I certainly found it so, unable to get to sleep, despite the best intentions, and waking up early... Not particularly depressed or anxious, just very, very tired from excess of yang energy yesterday; interestingly, this also relates to the insomnia card in the Voodoo Tarot (9 of Swords), which links it with angelic energy, while the I Ching calls it "dragon energy"... ;-))

Sims update (for Kelly, and anyone else interested!)

2006-09-17T12:05:00.000+10:00
I have created a few "super-kids" by now, boys and girls, A+ grades, happy-go-lucky, well-adjusted, play with, feed and clean their hamsters, have plenty of time for fun after minimal study, bring up their dysfunctional parents (lol!): Cassandra Goth also turned into one, after some doubts, and allowing plenty of time, before revisiting that household, for the characters to "refresh" themselves (a little trick if you don't like how a scenario goes: quit and save if it has redeemable elements, quit and don't save if it seems a total disaster, like when one of my mothers got sick, with a virus, picked up from her super-kid daughter, from school, and died... You have to watch sickness sneaking in: the kids usually pick it up - from school, or an allergy to their hamsters, which they otherwise love? - and tends to spread to the parents, who then find it harder and harder to get to work, even if they had good, or reasonable jobs, and for some reason the Sims game does not provide medical treatment among the available "services" you can ring, so there just doesn't seem much you can do about it; hot baths and chicken soup provide some temporary relief, but do not cure! ;-P)

Funnily enough, I find myself more interested in the family dynamics of households with kids than any "hot dates" for the singles, although I have got up to expansion pack 4, Hot Date!) - however one of my happily married couples, the first one, the Mozart family, average parents of my above-average Wolfi Junior, did manage to have a "hot date" just grooving and dancing, and kissing, to the jukebox in their kitchen, while the kid happily amused himself blowing soap-bubbles!

Btw, the bubble-blower seems a great "fun-refresher", as close as the Sims families get to drugs... lol! You buy this bubble-blowing machine, especially if the kids seem excited about the idea when they talk, and the whole family sits around this thing like a giant water-pipe, or bong? lol! getting really silly and giggling, with bubbles pouring out rather than smoke... Just like marijuana for the whole family? The family that bongs on, stays together? lmao)

Superkids as some of my kids seem, they still seem in some way "freaks" as they have no friends in the neighbourhood, and even when Wolfi Junior got invited to Sylvester Newbie's birthday party, he just stood around outside, although others had asked him in; i.e. he just took one look at the crowd gathered within, and thought, "Nuh... not my kind of scene"? lol Even Cassandra Goth does not respond positively to him when he just rings up for a chat, and they both have their own recycled phones in their rooms! lol So, no little Mensa Junior society happening in the neighbourhood... but perhaps that just amounted to a crazy, freakish idea of my own! lol

But you gotta love how the kids' funtime interests and pastimes (chess, painting, music, on both electric guitar and piano) gets their parents in, and helps them with their job skills! (what I mean, by the idea of "kids bringing up their parents"!) hehe

Oh, btw, one other crazy thing that happened: Bella Goth, after an unsuccessful attempt to adopt a second baby, although she sacrificed her medical technician job to do this: i.e. at least one partner, and they mostly seem mothers, because they have the less well-paying jobs, has to demonstrate some initial commitment and dedication, although fathers can do their share of co-parenting, to relieve mum, when not too bummed themselves!) decided to tinker with their homechemistry lab, for a bit of fun, and trying to get refreshed, as the potion had had this effect before, and instead of refreshment, she got turned into a lumbering female Frankenstein monster, which effect, thankfully, soon wore off while Mortimer and Cassandra still found themselves at work and school: he has the job of science teacher, btw!)... So you have to watch that messing with chemistry sets: sometimes you get weird side-effects: another one with a chemistry set even got fined for releasing toxic fumes into the neighbourhood!) But Bella's monstrous, if temporary, transformation, seems as close I have got so far to anything weird, like an alien abduction! Talk about "weird Sim science", lol!

I still haven't found out yet how to upload webshots, so unfortunately I cannot send pictures of any of this yet! ;-P

P.S. On Sims update: breaking news - just happened today! My first Sims alien abduction - omg, little Cassandra Goth, on waking up in the middle of the night, after a quick toilet dash and her usual minimal (A+) study, decided to use their home telescope, on her 2nd floor balcony, to gaze at the stars... Omg, amateur astronomy seems possibly as dangerous as amateur chemistry, because, while Mortimer and Bella rattled around downstairs, fixing breakfast (as you do!) they suddenly heard screams emanating from above, ran up to check on Cassandra, and broke down in tears when they found her missing, and the telescope deserted... I quit, and did not save, unsure as to whether the "alien abduction" effect has permanence, like the Grim Reaper effect, or remains only temporary, like the Frankenstein monster effect! ;-P

P.P.S. (Meta-game reflection): Still too scared to go near the Mozart family for a while, as sickness seems to have got a hold, via Wolfi Junior, so maybe they need quarantining? Maybe this also amounts to a hint, from the game itself, to start developing the "Hot Date" scenarios with the singles, as the families have reached, or reach, their maximum potential at this stage? ;-p

The Tao of Chaos

2006-09-11T12:19:00.000+10:00
I have strange thoughts on digital vs. analog (from the Tao of Chaos, mentioned yesterday), on waking up at nearly noon, having slept my sorrows away at Collingwood dropping out of the finals, to our first truly "solar" spring day... although why the sun continues to shine, with Collingwood dropped out of the finals, I have no idea! How dare it? lol

I changed my watch from my digital, footy season watch to my analog, non-footy-season, Spiderman watch, and it occurs to me, this seems probably a good thing, because analog has such advantages over digital, that airlines have even reverted to it, for their measuring instruments, i.e. digital only gives you discrete numbers, separate chunks of information, e.g. "you have 50 l. of petrol left in your tank", but it does not tell you whether this means, "almost full" or "almost empty", as an analog measurement and display will! Analog clocks and watches show you the relationship between hours, minutes and seconds, where digital ones do not, i.e. if you don't know the convention that 11:59 will flip over to 12:00, you might think it will just go on forever, to 11:60, 11:61, etc., until it runs out of room on the LCD display, like the numbers on a pocket calculator! lol

Do kids brought up with digital clocks, watches and calculators really know how to "tell the time", I wonder? ;-))

Yesterday's I Ching
>> The present is embodied in Hexagram 64 - Wei Chi (Before Completion): There may be progress and success in these circumstances. We see a young fox that has nearly crossed the stream, when its tail gets immersed. There will be no advantage in any way. The first (bottommost) line, divided, shows its subject like a fox whose tail gets immersed. There will be occasion for regret.

I certainly did have occasion for regret, listening to the footy! ;-P

Maybe Collingwood getting to the finals, and then dropping out, equates to the inner meaning of "before completion"? So, while the Collingwood cheer squad will NOT sing at the Gawith AGM, as threatened, promised and even permitted, I won't necessarily cry into my lunch either; every year, Jews say at Passover, "Next year, in Jerusalem"; every year, Collingwood supporters say, "Next year the flag"? Oh, well, we mostly gave them a good run for their money, while it lasted! *sigh*

(The Tarot did not look good yesterday, either, what with the 3 of Swords in my cyber-Tarot, and the 10 of Swords in my personal Tarot: oh, well, the good thing about the 10 of Swords seems that Azaka the labourer rises to a brand-new day, and a rainbow of future promise, having already seen the worst!) lol

Daija View: Pluto... an archetype in transition

2006-09-09T10:24:00.000+10:00
Pluto a Planet? Or Not? How does this affect us Astrologically?...

Pluto, if you've noticed, they have redefined as a "dwarf planet." According to the new definition, we define a planet as a celestial body that (a) has an orbit around the sun, (b) has enough mass to be nearly round and (c) dominates its orbit. The astronomers have tried to define only what "planet" means in our own solar system, without considering planets around other stars. The new resolution also defines a class of "dwarf planets" that meet the first two criteria above, but not the last. This class includes Pluto as well as a slightly larger object known as 2003 UB313 discovered in 2005 (Sedna, now Pluto's bigger sister, not little?), and probably several other icy bodies in the Kuiper Belt beyond Neptune. It also includes Ceres, the biggest of the rocky asteroids circling the sun between the orbits of Mars and Jupiter.

So astrologically, what exactly does all this scientific hype mean? What should we do with Pluto's demoted dwarfed status? Actually, nothing. ...Pluto dwarfed or not, truly acts like what he represents. Not satisfied in the physical, trying desperately to return to his 'spiritual or supernatural status' of nothing vs. something. Of course many people may feel uncomfortable because one of the facts we felt sure of -- that we have nine planets in our solar system -- they have suddenly taken away. Actually, astronomers have disputed Pluto's status as a planet for years, and that disagreement came to a head when they discovered Pluto-sized 2003 UB313 last year, in 2005. Did this new object also amount to a planet, or something else? The debate led to the classification of both Pluto and the new object as dwarf planets. The new system seems more likely to last. We now have four small rocky planets (Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars) and four large gas planets (Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune). The asteroid belt separates the two groups. In addition we have a number of dwarf planets, comets and other smaller objects in the outer region called the Kuiper Belt. Astronomers expect to discover several other dwarf planets in the next few years. Many of these objects seem to most likely represent debris left over from the formation of the solar system. If they taught you a particular phrase to help in remembering nine planets in order, such as "My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas," you may wonder what phrase to use now. Astronomy Professor Phyllis Lugger at Indiana University suggests the following: "My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nachos."

So astrologically, what shall we do with Pluto's demoted dwarfed status? Actually, nothing, in my professional opinion, because Pluto has ruled Scorpio since 1930 or so, and because astrologically, we've also given Pluto an archetypical personality to coincide with the constellation associated with the 8th house. That personality represents transition-transformation and the desire of moving from the form of mass in the physical to the form of spirit -- which of course equates to our natural essence of being. This personality while needing or desiring you to see it while here on this earth, in physical form... never exits from the true status of SPIRIT or etherial, as in supernatural/spiritual. Pluto dwarfed or not, truly acts like what he represents -- not satisfied in the physical, trying desperately to return to his spiritual or supernatural status with the perpetual tension of nothing versus something. Yet, while here in life playing his flute, he physically hides behind a secretive bigger-than-life HUMAN ego that tends to erupt secretly, or behind closed doors. More often than not, especially seen in throes of passion, for example, in the bedroom, this personality expresses via extraordinary sweaty exhaustive displays that could take a variety of twists and turns while on our human way to the heights of carnal satisfaction. No wonder I've been skeptical of the Scorpian Nature -- even my own! We all have a little bit of Scorpio in our nature to some degree or another. And if you're a true blue Scorpio Sun personality, that seems pretty awesome. Removing Pluto, and replacing Mars, as your planetary ruler will guarantee only that you now will become only the second hottest Red Hot Lover of the Zodiac! Western astrology altered tradition and replaced Mars with Pluto as the ruler of Scorpio. So does this mean for all you hot and passionate Scorpios out there that you suddenly have lost your energy, sensuality, or karma considerations? Heavens no! In fact to the contrary. Pluto, astrologically and astronomically recognized as the ninth planet -- or reduced to status of dwarf doesn't change the solar system at all, nor does it affect the archetype of the 8th house, astrologically. The 8th house still seems where your greatest transformation takes place, and in every way, especially spiritually and physically, while present on this planet earth. I plan to replace Pluto with Mars, as the ruler for Scorpio, returning to traditional astrology. And in so doing, my dear tantalizing Scorpios this will only enhance your natural desires for change, and of course, make you all that much actively Hotter and more intense and even with more robust activity in the process! Cool your jets, and relax. . . you've still Got it per se, and there's no need for Cialis or Valentra, just yet!

Open email letter to go with article to Bjorn Erik tomorrow (Red Lunar Moon)

2006-09-04T10:49:00.000+10:00
>While in France most of the locals brought up the dragon over and over (expecially when discussing St. Michel)and made sure I knew that the dragon was paganism. Many of the stone coffins had Dragons at their feet.

You could also interpret these dragons as some sort of guardian spirits, surely? Even Michael has something fierce and dragon-like about him; if you see the William Blake engraving of Michael slaying the dragon, Michael looks particularly mean and dragon-like, not to mention sadistic, while the dragon just looks anguished and distraught! ;-P

>Gone, but never forgotten: so the endless theorizing about what the Grail is and where it can be found has been going on since the the Christianizing of the British Isles. For every pagan tale fitted with a holy hat (like the grave-stones tea_pi mentioned with dragons at their feet and Christian symbols on their crowns), the imagination is haunted by what lies buried there.

And nowhere did this pagan/Christian syncretism happen more seamlessly and non-violently than in Ireland, Brendan, so sometimes we do not know whether we look at a Christian artefact with Druid ornamentation, or vice versa! I know they boast of Patrick that he drove "all the snakes" out of Ireland, but I think we can take that as some sort of metaphor, perhaps for defeating the Druids in some sort of display of wordcraft? ;-))

>Next morning, a fisherman saw her corpse floating near the shore and recognized her by her lily-white skin and golden hair. She was buried under a rock on the shore with the dirge of the waves as her requiem. Every year, on Beltane eve, it is said that the Kelpie gallops across the green on his sea-horse swift as the wind, with the mournful ghost of a maiden held fast on the saddle before him.

Does it not strike you as funny, Brendan, how we love to anthropomorphize Death, a tendency which Terry Pratchett for one vigorously and humorously resists, with his Death, who ALWAYS TALKS IN CAPS, LIKE THIS, lol! If we must have an image of Death at all, the whirling vortex of a whirlpool itself would seem to me far more appropriate, and certainly corresponding well to the amorphously murky, watery depths of Scorpio, as it does in the Tarot! ;-))

> Winnie! It was YOUR Birthday.:) HAPPY HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a joy knowing you

Many happy solar returns, whomever! lol

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Al-Hallaj

...Spooky; on reading this article, I now see why my beloved chose to call himself after him! ;-))
In fact, it seems to me very appropriate that I print this out (when I have access to a printer, tomorrow) for my beloved, after a long letter-writing lapse, cos I had no idea what to reply by way of encouragement to his last, very despairing letter (which you can see for yourselves at www.bjornerik.blogspot.com), i.e he remains Al-Hallaj, and I remain, as ever, Javad Nurbaksh, "In the Tavern of Ruin" ;-))

http://www.gnosis.org/ecclesia/lect153.htm

>just got to read these words... wonderful.......perhaps you have a manner of rememberance we all here can choose or refuse:) to participate in on the Sept 8

Use the readings in any way, manner or ritual format you see fit on that day? I will ;-))

>and perhaps others would like to contribute to or add to or just participate in. would you be willing to form a little ritual for us here?

I would have no idea how, t, sorry! ;-P

>For the circle was the simple affirmation of that spaciousness which is consciousness itself.
Nice; reminds me of the Hermetic-Gnostic line: "God is the circle whose centre is everywhere and whose circumference is nowhere" ;-))

vbeg @ It was a divine schizoid madness that overcame him as he began to identify with such powers more than his own mortality. He loved some of them far more than his own limitation. The only thing that kept his madness from being was that at the core they all somehow merged into one Being-ness. Whether Goddess of Love or Angel of Death, the Crucified One or the laughing Buddha, each identity arose finally as a fluid manifestation from a formless Presence. And in this light too he saw eating, drinking, defecating, urinating humanness. He accepted all that appeared without judgment or loss of common sense.

Beautiful!!! Or in the words of Mike Scott:
*i saw the crescent
you saw the whole of the moon* ;-))

>what he evokes in the triangle is the reflection on the surface of the mirror of consciousness itself. And humbled, knew the mirror still gathered rust.

"Awareness is a mirror reflecting the four elements.
Beauty is a mind that is open,
and a heart that generates love."
(Thich Nhat Hanh, mindfulness gatha on looking in mirror) ;-))

>I have also come to appreciate Hendrix.

...as I have come to appreciate Elvis, hardly surprising since his Heartbreak Hotel became the #1 hit the year of my physical birth (1956)? You gotta love it when they spotted him as a "white man with a black man's voice" - possibly due to Native American blood? ;-))

Speaking of the Beatles, in the context of my Musical Tarot, I think also Paperback Writer got included (as King of Swords)... the court cards proved particularly difficult to pin with songs! lol

And of course, Norwegian Wood, among others, which my own beloved nearly ruined for me in Norway, as it amounted to the only thing he could play on guitar, along with a small composition of his own; except now it gives me nostalgic goose, or gnosis, bumps, whenever I hear it? (the something-or-other of Cups, I think) ;-))

> "O! I hello the moon!"

See today's subject- and signature-lines ;-))

And then the springtime brought on its usual (literal) fever, as does the transition into autumn, from which I slowly recover today; taking it easy with these inspirational words helps, as does the gentle and healing day of the Blue Cosmic Hand/Deer (Mayan calendar) itself!...

I still find said spring fever difficult to shake, as we speak; I find it difficult to identify which season I like the most, except in Norway that would definitely equate to winter, when we had SNOW!!! Norwegians thought me mad for enjoying it so much, but believe me, REAL snow amounts to a definite novelty for an Aussie (I got born in the wrong country; even my Chinese horoscope said a Monkey/Pisces could do well in the job of "ski instructor"... as if, born far from any snowfields here! But funnily enough, that seems the first thing I decided I wanted to become when I grew up, at age 5... though where I got the idea from, god/dess only knows) ;-))

I can sure tell you which season I like least, and that would equate to spring, with autumn following a close second; even though we all look forward to spring, and welcome its first signs in the returning light, flowers and morning songs of birds (a hallelujah of magpies, hehe!), its equinoctial instability does very strange things to my system indeed, i.e. first I want to shave my head, to resemble the sheep who also get shorn of their winter coats about this time ("oh, the springtime it brings on the shearing; click go the shears, click, click, click!" Aussie traditional bush song), I find that the days alternate between mild and balmy, and sullen and overcast (like today), and at night I just cannot get warm, no matter how I try to snuggle under the doona, that seemed more than enough all winter, with the result that I have spent the last long weekend wracked with coughing at night, and presumably keeping all the other tenants awake... Hopefully, I will find myself acclimatized enough to the new season to return to work tomorrow... And they say that, statistically, more people commit suicide in, yes, you guessed it! spring... Presumably because you can survive a whole winter (and even the holiday season, in the northern hemisphere) chronically depressed, but when spring comes, and your life has still not got any better, while everyone else looks more cheerful, you just give up... ;-P

*April is the cruellest month*(T.S.Eliot) ;-P

Actually, come to think of it, even in Norway, spring seemed just the season when all the snow turned to slush, and sludge! Let's NOT hear it for spring! o O... do I hear the sounds of distant poets champing at the bit already, with their spring rhapsodies? Call this an anti-rhapsody, if you like! lol

> I just want to understand the shadows on the wall

So sad, thisisthedove, and so reminding me of what happened to my beloved and me; but perhaps, as Al Hallaj, he flies on, anyway (I KNOW he does!). Translating from the Norwegian Krakeviks Songbook CD his parents gave me one (gotta revisit this CD in the evening!):

"In the Evening

"In the evening when it gets dark and all go to rest
then I shut up the stable and the barn.
And the sparrows bed down, each one in its little nest,
then you too presumably go to your rest.
But since I no longer know how to pass the time,
for in the long nights I feel so full of longing.
I just don't feel like sleeping.

"Now you stand before the mirror and comb your hair,
so black and serious your eye.
Then your heart may well beat, but why it beats,
you don't exactly know just yet,
for you haven't let anyone come close enough to you yet.
But your poor clothes hang on the back of the chair,
your shirt and your socks and your trousers.

"It's getting dark across the way and autumn is approaching,
and the mist thickens over the hedge.
On the paths in the woods, many have lost their way,
and the stars rise so fiercely.
But if you cannot come tonight, little friend,
then send a message and tell me when you will come again.
I have not seen you in such a long time."

(To Petra, by Krakevik; translated by Claire, with Bjorn Erik very much in mind!), i.e. attempting to translate poetry also seems an art-form in itself? lol

I leave this one also in today's digest, because I also intend to print it out tomorrow, with the article on Al Hallaj, to send to him! ;-))

I incorporated the idea of the Holy Grail into my own Tarot, as the Ace of Cups (what else, Ness?), using a Michael Leunig cup I brought him from Australia, that became his special cup, and a Renaissance angel cup (angel playing the lute) he gave me, which I blended together in the shape of my spider goblet... When my angel cup fell and broke a week before our fatal denouement in 2002, I knew it represented a very bad omen indeed... But it seems better to have known your personal Grail, and lost it, than never to have known it at all? And as we like to say, we still have an afterlife, or a next life? ;-))

Maybe we cannot contain the REAL Grail in any literal, material object, because we just cannot contain, or hang on to it? i.e. it might visit us, and bless us, if it likes, but we can never, by its nature, retain such a visit and blessing long on the material plane, by its nature? OK, call me a hopeless, tragic Romantic, if you will, but I feel the necessary physical loss propels it over the edge into the realm of the larger-than-life, archetypal or mythical dimensions, the realm of "courtly love", necessarily from afar? ;-))

The Sturm und Drang surrounding this reminds me also of this month's Mayan oracle card, the Hero Twins, Xbalanque and Hunahpu, who had to go down and defeat the lords of death in a mystical ball game: just another Sunday game of football, about which I wrote a little Lovecraftian short story on the wyrd_crossings list, hehe! lol

And one of the few good things about spring down under seems that, if your footy team has survived into the finals, footy season continues, and we live on to fight another day! lol

(We meet the Western Bulldogs next Sunday: another showdown in the Western corral... hehe)

Love, Dragonwizard/Claire xxx
"I tell you, in order to give birth to a dancing star, you must have chaos in you. And I tell you, you - you have chaos within you!" - Nietzsche.

"I polarise in order to purify,
Stabilising flow.
I seal the process of universal water
with the lunar tone of challenge."

A poem someone posted on the Slouching Buddha list yesterday (with apologies and thanks to whomever posted it!):

> When did you stop being my lover?

Why do you close that door...

why does your fire burn so high when your playing;

yet, you put it out when you really Know What you hold?

You say that my Touches are like Chocolate...

but i'm afraid to REALLY touch you

you'd shy away

we had only begun to Rise....

and in that instant you shut your eyes

do you keep us from flying?

what scares you so??

and Why am I So Willing.....

I don't question your love

I just want to understand the shadows on the wall

****"Expectations are resentments under construction."

Anne Lamott

Counselling stuff ;-P

2006-08-30T22:32:00.000+10:00
web: www.theaca.net.au email: philip@theaca.net.au
PRESS RELEASE
23 August 2006
Victorian Government Says "No" To The Regulation Of The Counselling Industry
After 3-years research and investigation, the Victorian Department of Human Services brought to a conclusion the possibility of a regulated model for the Counselling Profession, in the State, and Nationally.
The nature of Counselling results in very few complaints being brought against Counsellors. Counselling, as opposed to Psychotherapy, is more about empowering clients to make their own decisions....

...and yay to that, might I add? lol

Strange thoughts about gravity

2006-08-30T19:28:00.000+10:00
I had strange thoughts about gravity, coming home from Gawith Villa this arvo, and watching Colin do his usual gravity-defying, leaning-tower-of-Pisa thing: on the tram, it occurred to me, gravity seems the most negligent of forces, at the sub-atomic level, BECAUSE gravity only = a bending of the space-time continuum around objects of mass (Einstein), AND at the sub-atomic level, objects, if any, look very tiny and don't take up much space, hence the negligibility of tiny, sub-atomic, so-called 'particles', even at the so-called sub-atomic level!

I don't really get all this What the Bleep stuff, but then neither did Niels Bohr...hehe! lol (But maybe in some deep and synchronous way this blog post contributes to an ultimate 'Theory of Everything'? hehe).... Welcome, all you slouching buddhas, to comment on this post, and a lotus to every single, one of you coming buddhas! ;-))

Nice one, Pies!!!

2006-08-27T18:10:00.000+10:00
Looks like today's Tarot of the Princess of Wands (Petro Hounsis, Voodoo Tarot, see link in sidebar) may have helped Collingwood resoundingly put the last nail in the coffin of wooden-spooners Carlton, and today's cyber-Tarot of the 5 of Wands (Petro Ogoun, i.e. Fiery Warrior, q.v.) also signifies a battle worth fighting on....i.e. soldier on, Pies!!! You have not lost everything, yet!!! GO, PIES!!! Pies seem horrible when cold, but when hot, NOTHING beats them!!! Shame about my hero Alan Didak (normally Mr Footy Q, as opposed to IQ, or EQ) having to take a short holiday, too long at this time of the year, though... ;-P

At last! The Absinthe Bourgeois 'Chat Noir'.

2006-08-22T17:11:00.000+10:00
They recently added one of the most striking and charming of all absinthe images to the Virtual Museum - the famous poster for Absinthe Bourgeois, showing a black cat enjoying a glass of the company's product. These posters have tremendous rarity, but recently someone found a few in almost mint conditions still in their original art nouveau frames, as part of a cache of original documentation from the old Bourgeois factory. Link to the Virtual Absinthe Museum here: http://www.oxygenee.com/absinthePOSTERS9.html.

An updated Tarot reading on the Middle East, as requested by Josh ;-))

2006-08-16T07:14:00.000+10:00
I will stick to my beloved Voodoo Tarot of New Orleans (cross-referenced with the Tarot of Ceremonial Magick), since I don't even LIKE my own Tarot any more, although I still regard it as a valuable learning exercise; on the K.I.S.S. principle, I will keep it down to four cards, one for each leader, and one for the probable outcome... ;-))

Very weird cards... As in the previous reading (by Sepand), they contain no fire, and this time, no Major arcana, either!

1. Ehud Olment (Israeli leader) - 10 of Pentacles: very materialistic, and concerned with security needs for the future; busy stockpiling; needs awareness that that spoils, which one does not put to good use! i.e. things can go off under his nose, as he busily collects them. Extraordinary wealth and material prosperity, accumulated over many years. He should recycle his wealth by acquisitions and philanthropy, i.e. use it for the betterment of the conditions of his people (and others?), not destruction. If properly applied, true wisdom and happiness.

2. Hasim Nasrallah (Hezbollah leader) - 6 of Pentacles: a childlike or childish person, the trickster in this situation, making mischief, up to no good (and presumably not in the relatively harmless way of small children!), i.e. a child playing with matches, only a bigger box than children normally have access to! Investment of labour or resources results in high yields. A settling down. Temporary success.

3. Foud Siniora (Lebanese leader) - Page of Swords: the most rational person in this scenario; wisdom in the handling of material affairs, well able to carry trust and responsibility, ability to translate dreams into physical reality, cleverness, firmness and aggressiveness. Can find himself anxiety-ridden, crushed by responsibilities, especially those of the family. He should learn that sometimes it seems alright to abandon responsibilities, and cast all cares to the winds!

4. Probable or likely outcome, based on present energies - Page of Cups: a certain idealistic romanticism seems in the air; perhaps Siniora can realise his dreams of a lasting ceasefire after all? A symbiotic relationship: these three need each other more than meets the eye. All seems "sweetness and light" for the moment!

Today's Tarot: from my Tarot - arcanum X, "astral fortuna"

2006-08-15T09:18:00.000+10:00
The thought behind this one, based on the TV program Wheel of Fortune, and the Melbourne movie Angel which based itself in turn on that, seems that too many synchronicities can amount to a bad thing! Note tiles spelling out letters of the name Adriana, in this sketch of the shrine dedicated to her ;-))

A Tarot reading on the Middle East, by Sepand

2006-07-30T10:48:00.000+10:00
1) Present position:Q swords - an aggressive woman, keenly perceptive, not unrelated to the city of New Orleans in some way, confident, gracious, just, but can also appear cruel, deceitful, unreliable; I think instantly here of Condoleeza Rice and her recent intervention (New Orleans connection via Afro-American origins?) - perhaps more rests on the decisions and judgment of this woman than meets the eye, i.e. if you want to pray for peace in the Middle East, pray for Condoleeza?

2) Immediate influence: 2 pentacles (Jup in Cap) - an ironic comment by the Tarot in this case, "plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose!" i.e. the more things change, the more they remain the same! Too many seriously vested interests (Cap) to make any change on the surface more than superficial (Jupiter)? ;-P

3) Goal or destiny: Ace cups - hmm, the Middle East originally gave us the idea of the Holy Grail, did it not? And all the bloody crusades that ensued since, over its fate... Will we find the distant goal or ideal of love and peace there a chimeric illusion, or reality, I wonder?

4) Distant past foundation: 10 swords (Sun in Gem) - maybe the worst has already happened, i.e. it just doesn't get any worse than this! This complete madness and disaster may well signal the end of people's delusions and folly, the "mother of all wars" as the "war to end all wars", again? (cf. 2 of P above) ;-P

5) Recent past events: K pentacles - another key player, along with Condoleeza; not sure whom the cards intend here. Who appeared most recently on the scene, anyone who pays more attention to the news? Generally a solid and reliable person with good instincts, unintellectual, laborious, materialistic; can also appear shortsighted, stupid and superstitious - I can only think of George Dubya, aka. the Shrub, here - any other suggestions? lol

6) Future influence: 5 swords (Ven in Sco) - a losing battle, not worth the effort, bound to end in defeat; inadequate energy to maintain peace; reason undone by sentiment.

7) The questioner: 2 swords (Moon in Lib) - Sepand himself, abiding in equilibrium above the disruption, maintaining a slightly uneasy mental peace, keeping own antagonisms and affinities in reserve, trying to get a more objective overview of the whole situation.

8) Environmental influences: 7 pentacles (Sat in Tar) - success unfulfilled, i.e. expected profits turn to loss or even liabilities - not only a losing battle (5 of Swords) but financially and economically disastrous and costly as well ;-P

9) Inner emotions (traditionally "hopes and fears"): 8 pentacles (Sun in Vir) - only retirement from the fray can result in any honor - save your money and resources for something more worthwhile! (My card for today, btw) ;-))

10) Final result, outcome: Water (Hanged Man) - martyrdom, loss; suspension, death, suffering; stasis, paralysis of will, apathy.

Lacking suit: Wands (i.e. intuition, real spirituality, will).

>Comparison among Q swords/2 pentacles/Water made me think that the "new aeon" hasn't launched here yet (As it seems reasonable): An effort to change the current Patriarchal influence.

Not necessarily, Sepand; Athena (Q of Swords) every inch a "daddy's girl", exclusively, i.e. a goddess who actually serves the patriarchy! ;-P

>>The people tend to resist change generally (5swords) by the act of fanaticism (Venus in Scorpio).

Not a bad interpretation, Sepand, i.e. acts of terrorism, whether individual or global, only tend to spin the wheels of the "same old, same old" losing battle/cycle of violence?

>>The Sun has always presented himself in the horizon, in perspective (K pentacles/Sun in Virgo); causing people to ruin each other as they "regard" his non-presence (K pentacles governs Sun in Gemini interestingly); bringing unstable peace of Moon in Libra which again its governer (Q of swords) has created it as its by-product

Idealistic approach (Ace cups) not necessarily anything to do with Condoleeza, Sepand, in fact she rather represents the Machiavellian (literally!) interests of the ruling patriarchy - but then so did the whole idea of the Grail originally, anyway? ;-P

>>The sons die in war and the remained feminine "peace" (2 pentacles) gazes toward the "Sun" (K of pentacles).

Everyone looking to USA to restore its "pax americana" (oxymoron; cf. Iraq!) ;-P

>What the succession of 7 of pentcales toward 8 of pentacles in eighth and ninth positions imply?

What do you think of my interpretation above, Sepand? ;-))

Wisdom of the Maya card for the 1st month of the Year of the Red Magnetic Moon

2006-07-26T16:27:00.000+10:00
Month of the Magnetic Bat: Venus Underworld (remember,that for the Mayans Venus coincided with our understanding of Mars, so the interpretation might seem odd and contrary): Mayans timed their times of warfare to when Venus "culminated" (the opposite of the situation here), so Venus in the Underworld denotes a period free of major conflict, i.e. relatively peaceful, tranquil and hassle-free... cool! ;-))

Happy Mayan New Year and volunteer birthday to me!!!

2006-07-26T15:54:00.000+10:00
Woo hoo! Today, just as I had got into the groove of the Mayan New Year of the Red Magnetic Moon, after welcoming it in and celebrating it last night, and we lined up for Katrina's 2nd (Gawith) cake, at lunchtime at Gawith, the volunteer coordinators came in to tell me I had passed my 2nd milestone as a volunteer there, so I unofficially/officially co-celebrated also with Katrina and Gazza (who shared a birthday, exactly 10 years apart, on Saturday). I felt almost as spoilt rotten as Katrina herself, since her worker Brygida not only remembered to pick me up a meat lovers' pizza at Bakers' Delight, but also kindly refused to let me pay for it, and I also felt thoroughly stuffed after not one, but two pieces of birthday cake! How could I not have remembered beginning something as momentous as volunteering, and thereby starting a whole new life, and lifestyle, on such a momentous and awesome day as this? Whatever... since my 5oth birthday in April turned into such a huge anticlimax, despite the kind attentions of Sebi afterwards and the beautiful gift from Bjorn Erik, much afterwards, I have decided that this means my real birthday must now take place on July 26th, since I got somehow mysteriously "born again" 2 years ago. So, while I may find myself still a toddler, maybe I can look forward to having a second everything, second childhood, second adolescence, and...who knows? Unfortunately, I also share this new birthday with John Howard, so they tell me, but I feel more people will shrug and say, "Who cares?" to that one. So now this former sidereal Pisces has turned around and become a sidereal Cancer (still soppy and watery, though, so I guess I can still claim the King of Cups as my Tarot card!) lol

In fact, just to remind myself of this momentous red-letter day also for next year, why don't I go and update my profile to that effect right now? lol

(No, becoming "born again" does not mean I have become one of those creepy fundamentalist types, as I did in my previous adolescence... or, at least, not until my next adolescence, due in about 17 years, aged 67? lol)

Maybe this happens when you have a beautiful Jupiter lurking in the wings, in the 12th house, in Cancer (i.e. exalted in the sign and accidentally dignified in the house)? hehe

A new addiction...

2006-07-24T19:40:00.000+10:00
OK, I will admit to it; I have found a new addiction even more riveting than Literati (believe it or not!), namely the virtual world of the Sims, according to the packaging, "the world's no. 1 selling PC game EVER!" It frightens me, but once one of these little creatures engages you, you just can't stop; I found the whole set of 7 discs at 25% at Chadstone last week, and felt I could not afford not to get it, $140 worth at $35, since the concept of virtual social simulation fascinated me ever since I read about it Psychology Today magazine. It takes a little while to get the hang of, but once you do, it becomes Big Brother, in which you play the role of Big Brother (or Sister), meets virtual, or webcam, reality. I started with the Goth family on the second disc (Livin' Large), which promised extreme situations, like roach infestations and alien abductions. The family suffered a number of traumatic and tragic events, such as finding their space invaded by the "tragic clown" who came to life from a painting on the wall, losing their adopted baby to social services for failure to look after it properly, and losing their natural daughter to military school, because of her failing grades and extremely dysfunctional behavior. When the Grim Reaper came to take Mr Goth, Bella mourned briefly over his urnful of ashes, but now she gets on with life in her own little house, and seems much happier there. Basically, you just have to keep them fed, watered and amused, with either serious fun or just plain fun, and Bella has turned out to represent my only character who managed to get a job (all the others seemed too depressed to even want to look!) as a subway musician, although she does not play music at home, preferring her virtual reality module for "kicks", feeding and watching her fish and watering her plants and pottering in the garden, when not at work. She has not yet had a "hot date" though, despite the title of disc 3, and has no friends, seeming at times a "socially challenged moron", who occasionally loses track of time and pisses off all her would-be friends by ringing them at night, and herself by attempting to call them during their working hours. It seems she equates to a lesbian, also, favoring black leather chaps, and the closest she got to a "hot date" downtown seems jiving to a jukebox with some hot black sheilas.... ;-))
I have found it disturbingly easy to lose all track of time myself playing this, or rather, letting the simulation unfold. It also does strange things to your visual field when you have played it too long, i.e. seeing everything in terms of pixels, which swarm about like ants over the floor? The weird thing about it, though, seems that nobody ever has sex in it, and two characters cannot even sleep in the same double bed! Apart from that though, the simulations seems pretty true to life so far, although I wonder what happened to the alien abductions (mind you, Cassandra Goth did talk a lot about aliens before finding herself packed off to military school!)... lol

A gnostic moment: the colour of magick?

2006-07-04T07:48:00.000+10:00
Last night I dreamt wonderful dreams, in which I channelled Thomas Merton, the last of the great Catholic surrealists since James Joyce!
This morning I woke up and looked again at my card of the day, Ace of Cups, Ayida Wedo, in my beloved Voodoo Tarot of New Orleans. Suddenly, even before meditating, I saw it with new eyes, and it felt as if "scales fell from my eyes". I had never before realised why she looks so butch, almost mannish, and thought the background behind her a rather nondescript colour, not at all watery, as one would expect for the "root of the powers of water". I suddenly realised, this = octarine, my own personal colour of magick, the colour of the iridescent sheen on soap bubbles, the colour of the possibly impossible, impossibly possible marriage of fire and water, the rainbow (Ayida Wedo) and the feathered sky serpent (Danballah), the heart of Voodoo gnosis. I also realised that my rare moment of real magick equated in fact to my marriage to Bjorn Erik, also our very own attempted Blakeian marriage of heaven and hell, on earth! Now I seemed fire, he water, now vice versa (but actually personality-wise I = water, King of Cups, and he fire, Prince of Wands, as I later discovered from the Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory); in some ways I seemed too butch, too mannish for him, but not really...! We still have this "marriage", but one cannot realise this "impossible dream" for too long on the mundane, earth plain?
After meditation, my daily card boiled down to this one, plus Rada 6 (Papa Legba, storyteller: hence this urge to write it all out!). And it too now represents for me a possibly impossible, impossibly possible marriage of fire and water, the woman arising from the sea to have her hands kissed and ignited by the sun (interestingly, this card corresponds to Sun in Scorpio in the Tarot of Ceremonial Magick, i.e. also hinting at deep mysteries: the little mermaid of Hans Christian Andersen, only now, as I realise, more Scorpio and enjoying life, than tragically Pisces?) ;-))

Latest from Bjorn Erik: belated 50th birthday present!

2006-07-02T08:04:00.000+10:00
http://bjornerik.blogspot.com/

And he seemed very well when we spoke on the phone on Friday night, as well! Now I enter my 51st year with some beauty, grace, dignity and elegance; he always had much taste than I! ;-))

First 4 Liber Intranaut illustrations

2006-06-30T08:17:00.000+10:00

1) "Endless Mind", as requested by Su (note tiny little "help" in corner
2) Introducing Chaostation: bit of a challenge, doing an organic tesseract, as curled-up spider!
3)Inside the Hub: had to do it from above, to get in the entrances to all the pods
4) Sigils of Hub and all pods, incorporating Auxiliary room, as pendant

Liber Intranaut illustrations (2)

2006-06-30T08:00:00.000+10:00

1) Black pod (synchronicistically entitled "Ghost Dance" by ska music program on 3PBS FM!)
2) Blue pod (or "doll's house, or sandpit massacre": thought it needed a sandtray, a staple of every play therapist, and got carried away, playing! lol)
3) Orange pod (had to incorporate my own Yahoo! literati avatar here, as Orange pod worked especially well for me here!)
4) entrance to Green pod (as decided democratically by a straw poll of fellow campers in the Upper Yarra Valley

Liber Intranaut illustrations (3)

2006-06-30T07:31:00.000+10:00

1) Spirit, dragon or fairy tree, as observed in Green pod (I couldn't get in nearly everything I could see, but it gives the idea of interrelationships also with unseen entities, as well as seen?)
2) Heart of Green pod (don't know if I really captured the afternoon tranquillity of this pool)
3) Ochosi (Voodoo hunter loa) in Red pod: drafted this in Photoshop before painting it - circle of stones basically a truncated Stonehenge, and I do feel pleased with how the stones look "alive", and each have individual character (a personal favorite - want to keep this one!) ;-))
4) Purple pod (started off as the entrance to Green pod, did not get democratically elected as too abrupt and precipitous for the gentler Green pod, so it got turned into a passionate beach scene instead, incorporating "pillar of water", as opposed to pillar of fire?

Liber Intranaut illustrations (4)

2006-06-30T07:02:00.000+10:00
1) Octarine pod (a bit "cartoony" and manga-style, but I like how I rendered the opalescent sheen of the soap bubbles, and delicate background in soft pastel) ;-))
2) Yellow pod (only one painted on a board, during art group at Gawith villa, intended as a tribute to both the visual and poetic arts, incorporating the poem by A. O. Spare as a kind of text melange; the hand might do in black and white as a kind of alchemical, thumbnail logo, for the rest of the text?)

P.S. Had a very vivid dream last night (Blue Magnetic night: good night for dreaming!): Mick Malthouse (Collingwood coach) proposing to me, and gently seducing me by licking/kissing me all over... He did not seem that bad really, and only 3 years older than I!

Interpretation: More passionate about football than BEP at present, i.e. football as erotic displacement....d'uh! What else seems new? lol

My latest blog discovery...or why Mike Scott spent so long in Ireland? hehe

2006-06-17T11:46:00.000+10:00
Mike Scott and the Waterboys' blog: this = what they originally intended blogs for, imho!!! And Ken should especially check out Mike's post on "what I heard in Duncan's fiddle", for the Scottish dimension!!!

My apologies to the Waterboys: I did complain on their blog that I could not access their songs directly from here, but The Stolen Child roars out from my speakers, as we speak!!! hehe

*with a fairy hand in hand
with a world more full of weeping
than you can understand...* ;-))

The best band in the world, according to the Living Scotsman: a really insightful article here, and beautifully illustrating the living Celtic (competitive) alliance! hehe *fervently and devoutly drinks to that* (the Celtic blood in me will drink to any Irish/Scottish worthy cause! hehe)

Dropbears

2006-06-13T20:14:00.000+10:00
Hey, how come I find myself well and truly back in the "drop bears'" club?

the fate of Robin Fletcher, evil black witch extraordinaire

2006-06-13T19:47:00.000+10:00
http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5478,19451810^661,00.html

WOO HOO! Victoria soon to catch up with (almost) the rest of Australia? Our full moon magick, i.e. Victorian pagankind united, actually achieved something this time? hehe ;-))

Ansur would love this...

2006-06-13T06:15:00.000+10:00
...I woke up this morning thinking of zebras, for some strange reason (possibly something to do with the low-grade fever-deliria or full-moon dreams of the loooooong weekend!): how zebras seem surely one of the little cock-ups of the Creationist "God" of evolution: lovely creature, the zebra, beautiful markings, surely designed to live among leaves and grass - but in black and white? It would have to find itself able to run very fast, to escape - but then I have never known a zebra to escape a cheetah, have you? lol

Obviously these "dark" thoughts also relate to the ascendancy of the Demons over the black and white Magpies this dreaded month of the 6/6/06: what did I expect, indeed? My Collingwood magick needs recharging... ;-P

The only good news seems that the Demons obviously mistook the Magpies for fundies (black-and-white world-view): that will learn me for barracking for them against the Saints, weekend before last!

Scrying update (see post on feng shui/geomancy update, below!)

2006-06-06T16:29:00.000+10:00
>Scrying has always been a fascination of mine, basically cause I can't seem to see a damn thing. I have tried mirrors, water, flame...

I had not had any success with these at all, either, or perhaps not the "calm self" required, but this afternoon I could share with my friend Usch that I have in fact made some little progress with the Buddha-ball: besides the initial visions of Marie Laveau (Voodoo queen and original High Priestess of New Orleans, no less! See post on "feng shui/geomancy update" below), I have since actually seen and conversed with Papa Legba himself through the medium of the ball, and I also had a vision of the Prince of Disks, when I got that card one morning, although he did not seem so chatty, rather dull and boring, and a bit sad, in fact... I don't know who to expect tomorrow morning (scrying works best after morning Tarot meditation for me), but as I have the Justice card, I wonder if Agwe (normally Lord of the Ocean Deeps) might appear in his guise as Loup Garou (the Wolf of the Forest)... But I really have no idea who or what to expect; I find you cannot force the spirits to appear, and they come and go as they damn well please! Also I had to set aside my expectations (from previous reading) about things going cloudy, and then black etc., because I just don't get all that! I just look at the ball, and straight away the configuration of bubbles looks different, and has formed into something else, sometimes morphing again within the space of the session. So, besides having a "calm mind", I think the key to scrying amounts to setting aside your expectations, and letting come whatever will present itself; at least, I have fun with it this way, and Usch reckons it a good sign that I have "clicked into it" this way! ;-))

(Quite the opposite of ceremonial magick, I expect, which "commands" highly specific spirits to appear on demand! Scrying seems about feeling blessed by whomsoever deigns to appear... ;-)) )

>Thinking about this , I guess it is possible to recognise a lunar and a solar mode of divination; in lunar modes, one tries to obtain the answer through a medium (as in scrying) or an oracle , in other words one does not try to "look" into subconscious mind but trusts it to give the right answer in a rather general way, in a solar mode one tries to evoke a symbol of the object of study and examines it directly, lacks the overall understanding that lunar modes can offer but good for investigation of details. Now if Horus has two eyes representing sun and moon, would it be a good idea to try a lunar divination first and "interpret" the answer using a rather solar mode? (Though I feel that in a sense the solar eye corresponds to the modes we described as lunar and vice versa)

Hmm, interesting thoughts indeed, Pasha; thanks for sharing!!! Since I obviously gravitate towards the more lunar modes, perhaps no wonder that the scrying visions tie in so strongly with my preferred oracle (Voodoo Tarot of New Orleans)... Actually, lunar light represents the reflected light of the sun anyway, so I can see no difference between lunar and solar modes, really... Or maybe, with the Justice card as my card of the day, I should try, in a solar way, for a more balanced appreciation of both? Horus (the hawk) has also flown into my medicine wheel this month... ;-))