Sunday, May 15, 2005

Des conneries et salauds (or pardon my French) ;-P

Someone rudely awakened me ca. 2 am last night (yes, I had the sound switched back on my speakers, which I had had turned off!), an Alessandro from France, so, an Italian Frenchman, just saying hello, and wanting to chat, despite the big, bold "gone to bed" status message I had displayed on my Messenger. So I told him off in no uncertain French ("espece de con! Vous m'avez eveille d'un profound sommeil.......allez-vous foutre!") and then he sounded all hurt, with a "pourquoi tu m'insultes?", so I ignored him, as a complete idiot. If he understood French, did he not understand the bit about his inconsiderately having woken me up? If he understood English, did he not understand the "gone to bed" status message? And why did he begin to 'tutoyer' me, when I had stuck to the 'polite' vous form even when roundly cussing him out? Espece de crapaud! (Pardon my French) lol (In other words, take this as a warning, all who tend to ignore status messages: they generally do correctly reflect my status!)

A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort in northern Minnesota. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read. One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and starts to read her book. Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?" "Reading a book," she replies, (thinking "Isn't it obvious?") "You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her. "I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading." "Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up." "If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman. "But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden. "That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment." "Have a nice day ma'am," and he left. MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads, it's likely she can also think.

2 Comments:

Blogger Sebastian Aristos said...

Yikes, yikes and triple yikes ! If an Italian Frenchman woke me up in the middle of the night, I would think that I was in heaven and would have a very different (but perhaps much less colouful) French response to him calling.

5:42 pm  
Blogger Sebastian Aristos said...

And I like the little story at the end too.

6:17 pm  

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